Reflections and Goals

[Desdinova]

So I'm sitting here, listening to America's least favorite rock n' roll band (The Knack) while thinking about my current relationship status and state. The thought occured to me to write about this last night as I was driving home.

Before I was married, I was single. Before I was single, I was engaged. Immediately after my first fiance dumped my AFC ass, I eventually moved back in with my parents. I had little responsibility, and plenty of time. I searched the internet for answers as to why my fiance had left me, and I eventually wound up here.

The DJ Bible unwound my mind, answered my questions, and taught me how to interact with women. Once I started to have some success, I set myself two major goals I wanted to achieve:

1) Get revenge on my Ex.

Many here see revenge as childish. I usually have to agree, but using the art of seduction to get revenge was fun. I attracted and fvcked one of her friends. A year after we broke up, she showed interest in returning to me. I invited her out to a bar, ignored her for the entire night, and number-closed another woman directly in her sight. It felt great!

2) Avenge my teenage-self

I did this by dating a woman I had a crush on as a teenager. I used to wait at the bus stop with her on our way to school. She was a solid 9 in looks, and I never had the ba11s to do anything about it. I got to feel her from the inside-out

I actually ran into her last week and she's still fantastic looking (even for a woman in her 30s with 4 kids)

As an added bonus, I was also able to turn a female friend into a lover.

I considered myself to be pretty damn good with women. However, I wasn't THAT GOOD. Looking back, here's how I mainly attracted women:

The Bar

This is where I attracted most of my women. I'd work the entire bar, interact with everyone, and make out with ANYBODY who was willing regardless of their looks. It all worked to my advantage. I was also out at bars 6 nights a week. Monday was my night off.

Female Friend

I had a female friend who was constantly hooking me up with her single friends. Every single one she hooked me up with turned into a successful date.

There were a few other ways I met women, but these were the main two. On the downside, I rarely approached anyone, let alone did any cold approaches. I could have succeeded much better had I broadened my horizons.


Marriage

Getting married was one of the most exciting things I ever did. After the wedding, it was one of the dreariest periods in my life. Here I was, a man who was fairly successful with women, and I was alone. She was never around. I couldn't go out and sarge, I couldn't get her to spend time with me. After my child was born, I had to basically spend my time raising him because she wasn't really around to help.

So now, here I am, single again. Am I currently successful with women? Not really. My life has changed since the last time I was single. Here are the new challenges I face:

Responsibility: I have a home to care for and bills to pay
Child: He occupies the best nights to go out sarging: Wednesday through Friday, and every second Saturday.
Job: I'm on call every few weeks. It's now become every second week because we're extremely under-staffed. This takes away from sarge time.

This leaves me with Sunday through Tuesday (and every second Saturday) to go out looking for women (when I'm not working.) It's very unlikely to find a bar packed with women on ANY of the first three nights of the week.

The solution? My gaming skills need to be altered, modified, and fine-tuned if I am to have ANY success. Bars are pretty much out of the question. Therefore, I have set myself some new goals for this new stage of life that I'm in:

1) Get Revenge on my Ex

Yes, this one's on my list again. My goal here is to seduce one of her friends, or someone in close proximity of one of her friends. I however DO NOT want to re-attract her like I did with my other ex. I ended the relationship, I don't need to reject her again.

As a bonus, I had fun with my previous ex again. I took her out on one date (she paid) and I never called her again.

2) Dust off my game

This has been a bit more difficult than I anticipated. I can't go out to the bar 6 nights a week anymore. I get two nights per week, one of them being Sunday. Not a lot of practice time there. After this realization, I came up with...

3) Become BETTER at picking up women than I was previously

This means that I have to pick up women in places OTHER than the bar, namely in PUBLIC. Unfortunately, women generally don't go out in public on Monday or Tuesday. They do however go out on SUNDAY.

Another goal I had was to complete the DJ Bootcamp. I ended up stuck on week 4, mainly due to my inability to carry a conversation. I put the bootcamp on hold to get this problem sorted. Have I done anything to improve this? Yes. I've been led on an incredible journey of information. I've got a good base to start with, I just need to build some conversation skills. I'm currently still working on this. After I get this skill under my belt, I may or may not finish the bootcamp. I haven't decided yet.

The things I've got going for me:

- A good knowledge of the Do's and Don'ts with women
- Good sense of humour
- My hair
- The ability to make a woman EXTREMELY horny
- Low approach anxiety
- Low fear of rejection
- Positivity
- Not Desperate

The road ahead is going to be an interesting one. I want to become the BEST person I know who can attract and seduce women. I will become that.

In light of my up-and-coming transformation, I've toyed with the idea of changing my username here, but I haven't decided on that yet.

Stay tuned for the re-birth of Desdinova...

 

[L B]

Nice! Keep us updated.

 

[zekko]

I don't get the revenge bit honestly. As long as you're living well, what does it matter what your ex thinks of you? It seems like you want to live on in her head in a certain way, by sleeping with her friend or whatever. I say who cares?

The other thing this post brings to mind is this: You said you were pretty good with women. Why is it so important to be really, really good with them? What do you gain from it? I know if you're going to be doing something, it's worth doing well. But if you're good with women anyway what do you hope to accomplish? A different lay whenever you want it? A brooad choice to select a LTR from?

 

[Sandow]

The things I've got going for me:

- A good knowledge of the Do's and Don'ts with women
- Good sense of humour
- My hair
- The ability to make a woman EXTREMELY horny
- Low approach anxiety
- Low fear of rejection
- Positivity
- Not Desperate

These are the main things you need anyways, and you've already got them. So I don't it's going to be that hard getting back into the swing of things. The main thing you want to do is make it become a habit with as little thinking as possible. And the way to do that is practice, practice, practice.

And I like the revenge on the ex. I'm currently trying to do that after she fuked me over. Everyone says to just leave her alone and don't talk to her again, but ef that, this slvt ain't getting off that easy! Anyhow, keep us posted.

 

[JCB]

You sound a little bitter Desdinova. Forgot the revenge and concentrate on yourself. When you focus your energies on bringing down other people you're just taking valuable time away from yourself.

 

[Desdinova]

Why is it so important to be really, really good with them? What do you gain from it? I know if you're going to be doing something, it's worth doing well. But if you're good with women anyway what do you hope to accomplish? A different lay whenever you want it? A brooad choice to select a LTR from?

Right now I'm just out to have some fun. I'm mainly seeking STRs. 3 months with a woman is a pretty nice amount of time before she starts to piss me off.

And why should I become better with women? Easy... SELECTION. I would like a broader selection than what I've got right now.

I can sarge a bar no problem. I can approach. I can get into sets. I can screw the bouncer's girlfriend. But put me out in public and I can't do 5hit.

The bar is great because everyone is contained into a single building. Social proof is easy to create. I can give a woman a little bit of attention at a time, then take it away from her. Then return to her table, and crank up the attraction. Then take it away again. I know how to do all that. I need something different for the purpose of challenge, selection, and to adapt to my own personal situation.

Forgot the revenge and concentrate on yourself.

And what's wrong with having both? I'm not in this solely to get revenge, I'm doing this all for my own benefit. The revenge part is just an added bonus, and I haven't put a time limit on myself to achieve it. However, when the opportunity does present itself, I'll take it.

 

[SoldMySoul]

Right now I'm just out to have some fun. I'm mainly seeking STRs. 3 months with a woman is a pretty nice amount of time before she starts to piss me off.

And why should I become better with women? Easy... SELECTION. I would like a broader selection than what I've got right now.

I can sarge a bar no problem. I can approach. I can get into sets. I can screw the bouncer's girlfriend. But put me out in public and I can't do 5hit.

The bar is great because everyone is contained into a single building. Social proof is easy to create. I can give a woman a little bit of attention at a time, then take it away from her. Then return to her table, and crank up the attraction. Then take it away again. I know how to do all that. I need something different for the purpose of challenge, selection, and to adapt to my own personal situation.



And what's wrong with having both? I'm not in this solely to get revenge, I'm doing this all for my own benefit. The revenge part is just an added bonus, and I haven't put a time limit on myself to achieve it. However, when the opportunity does present itself, I'll take it.

I think having the thoughts of revenge is normal and the Lord knows I have had my share of those thoughts. I do like the adage, "living a better life is the best revenge." When times are tough it is hard to live by that adage though. I constant strife to be the best I can too!!

Hey, DES, this would be a perfect opportunity to revive that fake profile on a dating site!!!! Man, that was one of the best threads ever around here! The entertainment value was just STELLAR when you did it!

 

[CrashOverRide]

Rollo had a great quote on revenge that really resonated with me. I'm paraphrasing at a very high level... but the premise was basically that the time and energy you spend focusing on vengeful thoughts and conspired actions is time you could spending improving your own life. Now that being said, I can definitely relate with how you feel Des. If the consumption of revenge needs to be done before you can feel any relief then by all means do it.

As far as your sarging situation... well you're going to have to day game it. Have you tried malls,restaurants,bookstores etc...?

On a Sunday you can go have a beer (or eat) somewhere and see if there's any lone wolves out.... or try to number close a staff member....

 

[Desdinova]

Hey, DES, this would be a perfect opportunity to revive that fake profile on a dating site!!!! Man, that was one of the best threads ever around here! The entertainment value was just STELLAR when you did it!

I actually created a female profile, just to see how things worked on the female end of things. It's a real eye-opener. I'd get chat requests every couple of minutes. The cool thing about having a female profile is that you can talk any way you want to these douche-bags. I received a message from a guy who was pretty built. Here's how that went:

Him: how come u wont chat with me?
Me: For such a big guy, you're sure a suck.
Him: HaHa, easy girl...jus tryin to chat & get to know this beautiful gurl is all lol

I can't believe how these guys can let themselves get stomped on.

As far as your sarging situation... well you're going to have to day game it. Have you tried malls,restaurants,bookstores etc...?

I've done it. Getting results is quite difficult. I'm currently working on re-vamping my game to get more results.

And as for the revenge, it's more for fun rather than to make the other person feel like crap. Women talk... A LOT. If I bone one of my ex's attractive friends, word will travel. I don't have to do a damn thing otherwise. But to bone the attractive friend, I need game to attract her.

 

[zekko]

But to bone the attractive friend, I need game to attract her.

That's true. I've seen a lot of guys try the "bone the ex's attractive friend for revenge" routine, and most of them got shot down. Then they all got together and had a laugh at his expense. So I'm sure it takes some skill.

I just tend not to care about my exes at all. They're exes for a reason. I've never wanted to get back with an ex, because that would be going backwards. That's probably one reason I don't get the revenge angle.

Now the girl friend I had in high school, I wanted revenge on her at the time, but that was the last, and that was literally adolescent.