Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Red pill knowledge backfires, rule 1: don't talk about fightclub, also marriage.

LiveFreeX

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Hi guys,

I'm writing this one to see your take on things. Last night, I was out with a colleague. We seem to hit it off really well and both have similar interests, however, during dinner he tells me he is going to ask his girlfriend to marry and in the same breath tells me that he thinks its okay for her to cheat on him once. I was a little blown away and maybe jumped the gun on this one a bit but I tried to intro him to game without slamming him... it was a touchy subject because I could see he is completely omega male on this one. Wife has short hair, he likes long hair and he feels she doesn't care. They live a long way from the city because of wife's job and wishes he was closer. She makes about equivalent money to him. I couldn't help myself as he rattled off red flags, it was like watching a slow motion trainwreck. I tried to tell him about 'The Game' while at the same time offering a red pill/blue pill analogy.

He became a little flustered, he is certainly an above average intelligence kind of guy and quickly wanted to leave. I felt as though I was offering him a religion as I mentioned it would be a new way to help him see the world by 'studying' the material.

As many of the forum members are fully opposed to marriage and are educated quite extensively on the subject, I would likely offer more support to them if they chose to marry or not to marry from THEIR standpoint. This is what I wanted to offer to him but what came out was more awkward and weird than anything. I felt terrible later on as he went into full denial mode and wasn't willing to jeporadize anything he had with his gf. What could have been a very cool relationship between two friends, suddenly went sour.

He gave me an analogy that fat people like cake, just like people like to cheat and if you step between them and the cake then you'll only make them angry and not want to be friends with you. I countered that you should not be around the fat person as they will eventually destroy your life for eating the cake. In my mind, eating the cake would provide temporary satisfaction while ruining this person's life in the long run, whilst denying the cake would change the fat person's life for the better. The reason many people are disgusted with their spouses for eating the cake would be because they wouldn't eat the cake themselves. It would eventually drive you insane letting an important person in your life destroy themselves. I said that I have the expectation of my wife not to cheat as I have the same expectation of myself. My brother is a recovering alcoholic whose vices ruined his life and screwed up a large part of his health and relationships with others.. what you are unable to control in yourself, will eventually control you and negatively affect those around you. He said he didn't share that viewpoint and thought it was perfectly ok for his soon to be wife to cheat on him... I felt as though this was already happening in their relationship and was a defense mechanism of sorts.

His view didn't extend from an alpha pespective on cheating but an omega cuckold one. We had a previous conversation where he told me his gf and he had come to the conclusion that gender was only a construct...more likely his wife is a feminist and been busily brainwashing him. It is such a waste to be in China and have THIS mindset, basically eating out of the trash at a 5 star buffet. The women here are submissive and great but it seems like omega westerners are coming here and choosing the most westernized women they can find.

I felt as if he was calling out for help but maybe I jumped the gun here. I feel as though I may have lost a perfectly good soldier....

Why am I so upset? Is my crusade against feminism ruining potential friendships or is feminism ruining the common man? Game has changed my life, made it better in many respects. Admittedly, game has ruined my ability to be 'happy' with 'the one' but allowed me to select my mate through careful testing, qualification and selection. I know I am getting quality because I have such a rigid standard for a woman. I don't mean to jump down anyone's back for it but I think when entering into marriage, you have to select the best possible mate for you, not just choose her because you 'love' her and aren't able to pinpoint reasons for this. In many ways, I'm not 'in love' with my wife as I know my north american brainwashing has programmed me to seek unhealthy relationships and fall 'in love'. My wife possess almost none of the qualities I have found attractive in the past but logically hers will be very healthy for me in the future and for raising a family. I really believe this is what marriage is for: raising a family. I believe one must select the best possible female with family raising characteristics as opposed to slutiness/sexuality or blind attraction. I guess I'm saying, you have to kill the 'in love' part of you before you are able to see clearly what marriage is and how it can be an advantage for the man.

I made the analogy to my wife tonight that there are two types of women: fruit and candy. You can eat as much fruit as you like, it makes you healthier and it tastes pretty good. You can also eat Candy, and while candy is sweeter than fruit initially, it will rot your teeth in the long run and will make you sick in the end if you eat too much. My wife was a little upset but I assured her that I do dip my fruit in chocolate occassionally in the form of sexy clothing for my wife, however, you can't dip your candy in fruit and make it any healthier for you. I have never heard of anyone eating a healthy diet consisting of pure candy with a little fruit on the side.

In my colleague's situation his 'wife to be' is neither fruit nor candy. More like a watermelon sized turd wrapped in a banana peel and dipped in chocolate.

Am I wrong here?
 

backbreaker

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this a losing cause.

the problem isn't his view point it's his self esteem. any guy who has such low self esteem he's okay with a gilr cheating on him and rationalizes it, even tries to propose.. i mean seriously dude you dont' think he's thought about this ****? he knows what he's doing. he just thinks this is the best he can do so he is making the best of a ****ty situtation
 

goundra

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u can't even really lead them to water, man, much less make them drink. they'll go to the water eventually, but that doesn't make them SMARTER.
 

Findog

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I keep my red pill views to myself mostly. I once sent one of my friends a link to one of Rollo's posts on rationale male without any commentary, just the URL. He went apesh*t, accused me of being a misogynist and having "issues" with women. Blue pill viewpoints are so deeply ingrained and accepted in society that you should not be surprised when people react extremely negatively upon being exposed to red pill ideas.
 

typical

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I'm going to say both of you guys are wrong, your views seem a bit too black and white ... but there is a tonne of truth to it and I understand what you're trying to say. But I have a slightly different outlook as the two women I'm dating right now are hot pieces of candy but can cook clean and are good with kids (from observing how they interact with my nieces and nephews and hers) and both can hold down decent jobs.

That mate of your's is a lost cause, let him be you can not save them all.
 

Zarky

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Is my crusade against feminism ruining potential friendships or is feminism ruining the common man?
Well, number one, this has nothing to do with "feminism" and everything to do with the fact that your friend is a giant shmuck.

But number two, as the Spanish say, "If you speak the truth, have one foot in the stirrup."

Then again, maybe the guy is wise. Maybe he understands that he's a shmuck, knows he'll always be a shmuck, and has embraced his shmuckiness and doesn't worry about it. Just as not everyone can be CEO of the company, not everyone can be a non-shmuck. If you went up to some guy who's been a middle-manager in a Fortune 500 company for the past 30 years and said "Hey buddy, why are you a lowly middle-manager? Don't you wanna be CEO, don'tya don'tya?? Why aren't you CEO by now, why?" He'd probably tell you to f*ck off. He feels lucky to be middle manager and have a somewhat decent life. He knows he'll never be CEO so why worry about it?
 

EastWind

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It's very human to feel superior because of a perceived "advantage" of viewpoint or knowledge, in this case knowing "game" or simply knowing things about relationships. And so you feel - partly to save the guy, partly to flaunt your own advantage of information - that you have to teach him something.

I've lost people because I sprung the red pill on them, too.

These days, when I do feel compelled to say something, I just broadly describe my point of view on the subject in question. If you really want to help people, make them see something but let them feel like they came up with it. For example, in your case, you could have said "I don't think I'd be comfortable with my wife holding the views your girlfriend has - she'd probably put her career first and not care about me enough" etc. This is just off the top of my head.

Also, when trying to "enlighten" others, always keep in mind that all of us here might be dead wrong about everything we believe we know on the subject of women and relationship. It doesn't look that way, but then for hundreds of years people knew the earth was flat.
 
U

user43770

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EastWind said:
It's very human to feel superior because of a perceived "advantage" of viewpoint or knowledge, in this case knowing "game" or simply knowing things about relationships. And so you feel - partly to save the guy, partly to flaunt your own advantage of information - that you have to teach him something.

I've lost people because I sprung the red pill on them, too.

These days, when I do feel compelled to say something, I just broadly describe my point of view on the subject in question. If you really want to help people, make them see something but let them feel like they came up with it. For example, in your case, you could have said "I don't think I'd be comfortable with my wife holding the views your girlfriend has - she'd probably put her career first and not care about me enough" etc. This is just off the top of my head.

Also, when trying to "enlighten" others, always keep in mind that all of us here might be dead wrong about everything we believe we know on the subject of women and relationship. It doesn't look that way, but then for hundreds of years people knew the earth was flat.

Good post.


I hate it when people try to push their views on me. I'm a hypocrite, though, because I occasionally find myself trying to do the same thing.

I convince others that their views are wrong about as often as they convince me - rarely.

I like to think of myself as a modest person, and I am when it comes to my need for attention; I'm an egotistical fvck when it comes to my beliefs, though.
 

3countriesPlan

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lol dude a ton of the girls here are totally masculine --- the boys carry the girls purses and the women talk in voices and accents deeper than the mans alot of the time.. plus Im sure youve seen how they spit in their bfs faces in public... they will tend to attract the omega desperate western afc who is just happy to have some female attention.. of course there are good ones, the southern ladies are fantastic, but up north...., wow.... just wow
 

scrouds

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If you want to do good, you're going to have to learn the soft sell.

I probably would have asked him, "so you don't mind if I bang your gf?" Get him thinking that he should demand more. Plant the seed and let him grow it himself. When that starts coming in, plant some more seeds.

Only men that have openly admitted they want to learn better ways should you dump stuff on them. And even then, dump stuff that's on or near his level. You don't give a man ASD stuff to look at if he's not even approaching. Don't even give him closing stuff if he's not approaching.

But first, plant some seeds and let them grow of their own accord. If they never take, that's on him.
 

Rave18

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LiveFreeX said:
Hi guys,

I'm writing this one to see your take on things. Last night, I was out with a colleague. We seem to hit it off really well and both have similar interests, however, during dinner he tells me he is going to ask his girlfriend to marry and in the same breath tells me that he thinks its okay for her to cheat on him once. I was a little blown away and maybe jumped the gun on this one a bit but I tried to intro him to game without slamming him... it was a touchy subject because I could see he is completely omega male on this one. Wife has short hair, he likes long hair and he feels she doesn't care. They live a long way from the city because of wife's job and wishes he was closer. She makes about equivalent money to him. I couldn't help myself as he rattled off red flags, it was like watching a slow motion trainwreck. I tried to tell him about 'The Game' while at the same time offering a red pill/blue pill analogy.

He became a little flustered, he is certainly an above average intelligence kind of guy and quickly wanted to leave.
I felt as though I was offering him a religion as I mentioned it would be a new way to help him see the world by 'studying' the material.

As many of the forum members are fully opposed to marriage and are educated quite extensively on the subject, I would likely offer more support to them if they chose to marry or not to marry from THEIR standpoint. This is what I wanted to offer to him but what came out was more awkward and weird than anything. I felt terrible later on as he went into full denial mode and wasn't willing to jeporadize anything he had with his gf. What could have been a very cool relationship between two friends, suddenly went sour.

He gave me an analogy that fat people like cake, just like people like to cheat and if you step between them and the cake then you'll only make them angry and not want to be friends with you. I countered that you should not be around the fat person as they will eventually destroy your life for eating the cake. In my mind, eating the cake would provide temporary satisfaction while ruining this person's life in the long run, whilst denying the cake would change the fat person's life for the better. The reason many people are disgusted with their spouses for eating the cake would be because they wouldn't eat the cake themselves. It would eventually drive you insane letting an important person in your life destroy themselves. I said that I have the expectation of my wife not to cheat as I have the same expectation of myself. My brother is a recovering alcoholic whose vices ruined his life and screwed up a large part of his health and relationships with others.. what you are unable to control in yourself, will eventually control you and negatively affect those around you. He said he didn't share that viewpoint and thought it was perfectly ok for his soon to be wife to cheat on him... I felt as though this was already happening in their relationship and was a defense mechanism of sorts.

His view didn't extend from an alpha pespective on cheating but an omega cuckold one. We had a previous conversation where he told me his gf and he had come to the conclusion that gender was only a construct...more likely his wife is a feminist and been busily brainwashing him. It is such a waste to be in China and have THIS mindset, basically eating out of the trash at a 5 star buffet. The women here are submissive and great but it seems like omega westerners are coming here and choosing the most westernized women they can find.

I felt as if he was calling out for help but maybe I jumped the gun here. I feel as though I may have lost a perfectly good soldier....

Why am I so upset? Is my crusade against feminism ruining potential friendships or is feminism ruining the common man? Game has changed my life, made it better in many respects. Admittedly, game has ruined my ability to be 'happy' with 'the one' but allowed me to select my mate through careful testing, qualification and selection. I know I am getting quality because I have such a rigid standard for a woman. I don't mean to jump down anyone's back for it but I think when entering into marriage, you have to select the best possible mate for you, not just choose her because you 'love' her and aren't able to pinpoint reasons for this. In many ways, I'm not 'in love' with my wife as I know my north american brainwashing has programmed me to seek unhealthy relationships and fall 'in love'. My wife possess almost none of the qualities I have found attractive in the past but logically hers will be very healthy for me in the future and for raising a family. I really believe this is what marriage is for: raising a family. I believe one must select the best possible female with family raising characteristics as opposed to slutiness/sexuality or blind attraction. I guess I'm saying, you have to kill the 'in love' part of you before you are able to see clearly what marriage is and how it can be an advantage for the man.

I made the analogy to my wife tonight that there are two types of women: fruit and candy. You can eat as much fruit as you like, it makes you healthier and it tastes pretty good. You can also eat Candy, and while candy is sweeter than fruit initially, it will rot your teeth in the long run and will make you sick in the end if you eat too much. My wife was a little upset but I assured her that I do dip my fruit in chocolate occassionally in the form of sexy clothing for my wife, however, you can't dip your candy in fruit and make it any healthier for you. I have never heard of anyone eating a healthy diet consisting of pure candy with a little fruit on the side.

In my colleague's situation his 'wife to be' is neither fruit nor candy. More like a watermelon sized turd wrapped in a banana peel and dipped in chocolate.

Am I wrong here?
Are you sure he wasn't actually inviting you and left cause he realized it wouldn't happen ?

Edit: Sorry, backbreaker has already covered this point in his post. Didn't read it carefully :eek:
 
Last edited:

sageproduct

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LiveFreeX said:
It is such a waste to be in China and have THIS mindset, basically eating out of the trash at a 5 star buffet.
LOL

Too bad Chinese girls are ugly and boring.
 

LiveFreeX

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Guy called me out at work asked me to demonstrate my skills to all the women and see how they would feel if I tried my 'GAME' on them. Then he described it as manipulating women and said you should just be a gentleman.. obviously women reacted badly to hearing about it... I tried to downplay it as charm but the women did their usual bs, they gave the 'charm can't be learned' superiority talk, as all women know game better then men apparently...ending in the thats 'creepy' stuff. He went on a bit of a tear at work, I'm glad I didn't give him the forums or any of the sites away. He was really hostile to it. I didn't push it on him or say anything. All this after we had spent the evening together playing chess... I was really surprised.

Lesson learned, let people suffer. The Blue pill guys have the worst reactions.




3countries: I've never seen that before but I'm guessing those are 1st tier city girls and city guys, super rich super spoiled.. most of the good quality girls are located in tier 2's, 3's and the countryside... out there if a woman spits in a man's face, she'd have her head knocked off.
 

Down Low

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LiveFreeX said:
In my colleague's situation his 'wife to be' is neither fruit nor candy. More like a watermelon sized turd wrapped in a banana peel and dipped in chocolate.
Reminds me of most of the women I fvcked.

Look, if they guy can stand criticism and self-criticism, he deserves your friendship. If not, not.
 

Interceptor

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I cant take anything seriously when someone writes about the subject of romantic partnerships and intimate relationships and espouse that
"you have to kill the Love part of it (from yourself)".

I dont agree with the guy who wants to get married saying he'd be ok with her cheating once.
Never be ok with cheating of any kind ever. Fact is most women would never forgive you nor forget the incident if it happened with you. No need to extend a special priviledge or double standard.
If you truly love and deisre your woman, and are able to respect the monogamy you wont give in to cheating. You will still be attracted to other women , but youre not going to be drooling over piece of ass. You will maintain your composure and discipline and respect your relationship.

Anyway, whatever you do dont "kill your love" or anything like that.

Good luck.
 

taiyuu_otoko

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LiveFreeX said:
Am I wrong here?
Yes. Nobody wants somebody else's opinion, unless they ask. Even then they only want to be told they are right (kind of like most people on this forum).

What other people do is their business. Unless it affects you directly, don't worry about it.

The ONLY time I could see getting into it on this particular subject is if it's your childhood BEST FRIEND who is about to make a HUGE and OBVIOUS mistake.

Even then it's likely a waste of time.
 

LiveFreeX

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I suppose you guys are right. I should not have opened my mouth. Will know for next time.

@Interceptor: Not to derail this thread but for me dude, being 'in love' also means being out of control. Whomever is 'in love' isn't in control of themselves or the direction of the relationship. I'd rather be at the wheel, I like to keep 'love' out of my mind and in hers at all times. The only guys I've known who fell in love with a girl, let the girl drive and ultimately end their relationships and destroy their lives... Those same guys became jellyfish and were at the beck and call of their wives/gfs (I also have firsthand experience at this). When I suggested foregoing the wedding ceremonies and pocketing the cash they would become appalled (these are seperate cases), instead spending 10's of thousands of dollars and going into debt to give their 'love' the time of their life. I make a ton of demands from my wife and expect them to be fuffilled usually by the time I get home, stuff that would make other dudes blush/cringe.. If I want her to dress up nice, I throw her some money and tell her to go buy something sexy. She knows if she doesn't do it, I'll leave or take another girl at the drop of a hat. Some people say that I'm not a very good husband but I'm just keeping myself from making concessions for my life out of 'love'. I want my life to be a certain way, have most of the freedoms of being a single guy and do things my way. She looks at me to lead her so thats what I do... when she whines about sh1t, I can stand my ground without feeling an ounce of guilt. I take no disrespect and in return I don't get any. Our wedding cost totalled 2 american dollars.

When she asked me about the ceremony, I said I was keeping the money to invest in a house. I was very firm about this, nothing else was said. If she doesn't like the way I run the ship, she knows where the door is.

The one who controls most, loves least.

I think this is the best advice to give to newly wedded men. Stay out of love, stay in control.
 

AlNess

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Interceptor said:
I cant take anything seriously when someone writes about the subject of romantic partnerships and intimate relationships and espouse that
"you have to kill the Love part of it (from yourself)".

If you truly love and deisre your woman, and are able to respect the monogamy you wont give in to cheating. You will still be attracted to other women , but youre not going to be drooling over piece of ass. You will maintain your composure and discipline and respect your relationship.
This is a mature point of view. I know that "love" is usually considered a curse word around here, and equated with supposedly being "AFC;" but we are not robots, nor are we made of stone. If love doesn't factor into a person's marriage, that person got into it for the wrong reason.
 

DMSR76

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LiveFreeX said:
In my colleague's situation his 'wife to be' is neither fruit nor candy. More like a watermelon sized turd wrapped in a banana peel and dipped in chocolate.
LMAO @ this quote. This is awesome.
 
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