Recovering from bullying/male competitiveness

[Firefly]

Last year, I was forced out of my main social group due to jealousy and competitiveness. Essentially, because I was popular within the group, some people managed to start some rumors and encourage a complaint which forced me to leave.

I have since found a new social group which I am happy with. I have even had some members of my old group try to join this group. However, I still find myself ruminating over the behaviour of the people who ousted me, which is taking up a lot of mental energy. How do I get over this?

 

[Mike32ct]

My mom always said, "Consider the source."

You thought they were your friends, but they weren't. You now know what you were dealing with. So while it hurts, it should be comforting to know you are out of that group. You cut that BS from your life. If you continue to let it bother you, you are letting them WIN.

Enjoy your new group. If any members of the previous group come into the new group, be polite, but be sure to tell them as LITTLE about yourself as possible. They will want to know the latest about you and what you are up to.

Back-stabbers usually follow this cycle:

1. They "befriend you" quickly
2. You trust them and let your guard down.
3. You are open with them.
4. They have now secured the gossip material about you.
5. They will twist it around and use it against you.

So when old members try to befriend you again, they are just attempting to re-start the cycle at #1.

 

[glass half full]

exactly.

 

[evan12]

stand for your self and fight them , usually you have to show them that dont pass without price , and it is not backfire free . so they will think twice before messing with you