Recovering beta husband questions

[Tnt_tucker]

Hey guys

I've just discovered game a few months ago, I'm 29 and married with 2 kids. I've been reading non-stop Rollo, Roisy, a bit of Roosh (why all the Rs?) etc and I've been trying to employ game in my married life. I'm happy with family life but want to bring out the inner alpha and obviously pound more (wife) poon.

I can see a bit of improvement in both myself and her responses from what I've put into play but I'm still trying to get my head around basics like how and when to initiate sex etc. I've been sticking to Rollo's advice to avoid fapping but this leaves a bit of a predicament: a) initiate sex, get rejected and lose the dominant position or b) have my wang turn into a vagina from not being used.

I'm not interested in an affair nor do I want to hear from djs with no LTR experience given that their response will likely be flippant and provide no help.

Can anyone provide advice on this? I'm particularly interested in just general LTR advice as well.

Cheers

 

[Tnt_tucker]

Edit: sex is a nominal once a week during good times, bad times don't even ask. On and off we've had negotiated desire agreements which always fall through. One big plus in this arena is that we somewhat consistently try anal. She doesn't like it but she keeps at it to please me and because I keep assuring her it will get better and be awesome for both eventually.

 

[Colossus]

I'd check out "Married Man Sex Life" by Athol Kay. He's a married guy who started learning and writing about game after similar issues. He has a whole plan outlined for your exact problem.

Counter-intuitively, getting more married sex isn't about her, it's about you. Almost all the changes are going to be ACTIVE changes that take place in your appearance, attitude, and life outside of wife.

The problem with family life is that women tend to lose attraction the more beta a husband gets. Beta qualities are natural and even necessary for a happy marriage, but it can be overdone, and they do kill a woman's sexual response to your presence. The reason why, which you may know, is that you no longer have any element of risk, danger, or competition in her eyes. She knows you'll be there, doing the same things, looking the same way, pandering to HER wants and desires rather than your own in hopes getting some wifey pvssy scraps. And that aint no way to live.

I could outline all the things you need to do, but just read his book. It's a quick read. You are going to get the same general advice here anyways.

It will take some time, but the essence of it is that you need to reestablish your alpha credit. That is-- less needy, more decisive, in better shape, less caring of her whims and desires, and more apt to TAKE what you want. There is an art to it though. You'll have to figure that part out. Also, I hope you know this by now, but NEVER negotiate sex with your wife.

 

[Epimanes]

I agree with colossus.

Its a great site.

In conjunction with married man sex life. I would also check out marriage builders. Its got some great tools for learning about eachother and lots of crow for both spouses to chew on.

 

[JoeMarron]

Yep, Athol Kay his book and his blog will set you straight. Like Rollo always says, you can't negotiate desire. She has to want to fvck you and the only way to get to that point is to become more attractive. Also, check out The Sex God Method and David Shade's stuff. Your wife will be far more likely to want to have sex with you when she knows she'll be screaming in ecstasy every time.

 

[speed dawg]

In conjunction with married man sex life. I would also check out marriage builders. Its got some great tools for learning about eachother and lots of crow for both spouses to chew on.

Learn how to become more attractive FIRST....before applying any of Epimanes' stuff. He means well, but that marriage builder crap will get him divorced unless he does it the correct way. Right now, his problem is that he's not making his wife's p*ssy tingle. Correct that problem first, then you can move on to this 'communication' or whatever.

TNT....in a marriage there ain't no faking game. You have to own it and live it. It's tough to give you just overall general advice, so do you have a recent specific example of some way your wife disrespected you? And not a rejection in bed, because her wanting to blow you and f*ck you comes AFTER you're raised her IL in you.

 

[Epimanes]

Marriage builders is about good beta... But you need a balance of both. If your too beta, you need more GOOD alpha. If your too alpha (or all azzhat alpha) and no beta, then you need to add some appropriate good beta. Too much of either and your bound for troubled waters.

Marriage builders is far from be all end all of marriage fixing so I don't reccomend you focus on it entirely. Mix it up.

Balance is key along with appropriate timing on which traits to display.

Epi

Edit: in other words, beta is about providing relationship comfort and creating the hormone oxytocin (too much makes her too comfortable and entitled) and alpha is about being exciting creating a dopeamine hit (too much and you end up being an azzhat she hates and will likely divorce).