"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Recently turned DJ from AFC. Relationship management help plz.

sageproduct

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Me

-20 year old undergrad @ a public u
-Live alone in apt in big city
-Total AFC before this year. only kissed 4 girls ever, only 1 of which i had any interest in, never even seen nor touched a boob, never had a gf
-6 mo. ago i got into daygame and started cold approaching like a MADMAN. malls, grocery stores, train station, street, employees, milfs, anywhere and anyone i want.
-huge spike in confidence, social skills. no sexual results past kissing until a month ago but making huge progress
-although i do go to college parties and have plenty of college friends, i definitely prefer a more "adult" lifestyle of doing interesting things on weekends, going on dates during the week, and bars/clubs at night.

Her

Call her Sky. 23 year old grad student, very pretty but doesn't know it. Good sense of humor, super sweet, loves cuddling, makes an effort, all things that i like.

I met Sky at a bar beginning of Sept. Talk for 20 min, REALLY hit it off, we love each other, like her so much I don't give her more than a kiss on the cheek and just take her number to take things slow. Next day, text her, set up date until she reluctantly she tells me she just moved here 2 wks ago and has a bf back home.

I'm crushed because I never connected that well with a girl so quickly. I tell her that I'm cutting contact w/her because I can't just be friends w/her.

Then...

I cut contact. Until two weeks ago, I've got a couple new plates so I randomly decide to text Sky out of the blue. She's real excited to hear from me and suggests we hang out. So we do.

Boom, so many signs of high interest from her. She's ready to kiss me w/in 30 minutes of the date starting, I go for it soon after. Make out, grab food, she agrees to come to my place.

Watch a little netflix, then bring her to my AWESOME new memory foam queen bed, 90% of clothes come off. First time I ever take a bra off, I fail at it so she takes it off herself lol. I touch boobies for the first time in my life haha. She doesn't seem to want to go further, so I honestly tell her this is the farthest we go because I like her and want to take things slow.

Smooth Sailing

So past couple weeks, everything's going real well w/her. See each other 2-3 x a wk, text every day, she sleeps over a couple times, deep late night talks, lots of making out, shows high interest (almost always complies w/anything i say or do, makes time for me even when i can tell she's kind of tired). Sunday she even shows up at my place and drops off cookies she made.

Still slow sexually. Which is fine for me because it's my first time doing ANY of this stuff. Let's just say I blew a load for the first time w/her this monday, and no orifices were involved.

Last week I went out and sarged to keep the AFC in me from taking over. Picked up two solid plates, texted them but no meetups yet.

Sky's great. I actually didn't want to see anyone else. At this point in my life I want a relationship because I've never had one, and I want to lose my virginity in one. Although I really like her, I assure you I do not have one-itis. I have had one-itis PLENTY of times and I know this is not it.

But...

I fwcked up. I stupidly gave too much weight to the advice of one of my closest female friends, who said it was soon enough for me to ask Sky to be my gf, and that I should do it in a "cute/special" way. Now my friend is not an idiot, she is one of the smartest girls I know and gave me very useful pointers in bed and also was the one who was pushing me to keep talking to other girls after seeing Sky even though I didn't really want to. It's my fault for misreading the situation.

Last night I had plans w/Sky, I broke them. Then I surprised her at her place real late w/hot cocoa (inside joke) and a rose. I tell her "I don't want to see anyone else right now. I want you to be my girl"

To cut the whole thing short, she tells me she's not seeing anyone else but is not looking for anything serious cuz she just got out of a relationship (yes, yes, I understand what that really means). Says she doesn't want to see anyone here, but if she were to go back home...

I play it cool enough, say "I thought you might feel that way, but I just want to tell you where I stand."

So.

Time for me to pull back immediately right? Hit up those other girls, cut Sky down to once, maybe twice a week, but otherwise act pretty much the same way?

Plus, don't bring up ANY relationship stuff unless she does right? I know the DJ convention is the man escalates sexually and lets the woman handle all the relationship stuff. I strayed from it, I messed up.

The Others

3 Plates, in order of desirability:

1. Really cute girl I cold approached while she was working at clothing store. Got a first date w/her tonight :)
2. Cute gamer girl I cold approached last week. High interest, no first date yet. Attractive in very alternative way that only some guys appreciate (pink hair, lip piercings). I've never gone out w/an "alternative" kind of girl before but I kinda like this one. I like games, she likes games.
3. 27 year old asian girl, super short, went on one date w/her before seeing Sky. She's alright, nice but not terribly interesting. Seems to have pretty strong interest in me.



OTHER QUESTION

I do NOT need to mention/bring up to Sky that I'm seeing other girls, right??
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

switch

Master Don Juan
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At this point in my life I want a relationship because I've never had one, and I want to lose my virginity in one

1.losing your virginity doesn't mean anything, this definition(virgin) can only be used when refering to a chick, men can't lose their virginity, because we don't have a hymen
think, when a girl loses virginity she loses her hymen, but what about men?
does your **** come off when you have sex for the first time? lol unless you are futanari....thats well another thing
anyway losing your virginity is nonsense produced by the media

2.a relationship won't change or improve your life....but it can make it worst

27 year old asian girl, super short, went on one date w/her
^ha ha ha in fact im dating a midget asian aswell atm..lolz

4.as for sky ..dump her ass in dumpsvill, this post shows that she is giving you a headache, therefore get rid of her or LJBF her..she's a dead end

5.gamer girls are usually stoners...ditch her
 

Kbomb

Senior Don Juan
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You basically went full afc mode on this girl, making you unattractive as hell. Your female friend is an idiot btw. I know your not supposed to believe that but she just gave you awful advice no one would ever give you here.

Secondly, its salvageable but you have to man up and be funny and aloof. Get your manhood back. Your ultimatum ultimately revealed your insecurities and inability to handle the unknown.
 

sageproduct

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switch said:
1.losing your virginity doesn't mean anything
Lol about the hymen part. I've definitely heard that case. This isn't something that's super important to me, but I do have a preference.

2.a relationship won't change or improve your life....but it can make it worst
Thx for the insight. It's just something I've never ever done before, and I feel like I need to try it to gain some perspective, both on the world and on myself...it would be great to really get a better understanding of my own shortcomings.

as for sky ..dump her ass in dumpsvill, this post shows that she is giving you a headache, therefore get rid of her or LJBF her..she's a dead end
Lol man that's a little extreme, I don't see any reason to do that. She's not holding me back in any way because I'm seeing other girls starting now. She's far from a headache, she's always got a positive attitude and makes me feel good. Nothing wrong with continuing to see her once a week.

Unless my lineup fills up so more that she gets bumped off, lol. I don't readily see that happening soon though.

5.gamer girls are usually stoners...ditch her
Lol. Hey, I'm pretty new to this still, so I'm gonna give it a shot :)

Kbomb said:
You basically went full afc mode on this girl, making you unattractive as hell. Your female friend is an idiot btw. I know your not supposed to believe that but she just gave you awful advice no one would ever give you here.

Secondly, its salvageable but you have to man up and be funny and aloof. Get your manhood back. Your ultimatum ultimately revealed your insecurities and inability to handle the unknown.
Thx. I know I went afc mode. I wouldn't say full afc mode lol, but somewhere in between. Roger that, funny and aloof. Slightly juice up the teasing and "game"yness around her, give her a LOT less attention, time, and affection.

I don't even want a relationship that much, it just seemed like the right thing to do. A man is supposed to know what he wants. But let's be honest here, I don't know what I want because I have no experience to go off of. It's ok though. As of this typing I basically have three dates lined up already with each of the other girls from the previous post-tonight, sunday, monday. Gonna show up an hour early today as well and sarge a bit then probably hit the bars after for more.
 
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