DinoCassanova
Senior Don Juan
I had to take a one-day (same day actually ; I left and returned the same day) business-related trip to St.Louis earlier in the week, and on the plane on the way back I happened to wind up seated (in economy class ; blah) next to a halfway-decent looking lady. She turned out to be a few years older than me, 33, married incidentally. I sat clammed up the first little while there (reversion to habit / old AFC ways) but then I thought about all of this and I knew I had to do something. I had no clue what to say, how to open. It had been a long boring day at this seminar and I really wasn't in the mood for much "banter". But still........ this is a perfect opportunity at least for practice, right?? So anyway she was peeling an orange, as it happened, and so I used that and I said, "Would you mind putting your orange out?" (I was planning here on trying to make a joke relating it to a cigarette, you know, but that didn't really work out). She looked at me like she didn't understand. I had to keep it going, quick, so I said, " I'm sorry. It's just that I can't stand being in fairly small enclosed places with citrus fruit. The ....... " (I paused here because I was now basically blanking out) " .... scent of it ... nauseates me." She kind of laughed and she said, "Oh, well, I'm sorry about that." (She actually did NOT continue to peel the orange for the rest of the flight, I noted). Then from there I proceeded with just casual small talk. "Dino." I said, holding out my hand. "And you are?" (I've found this is a fairly effective and assertive seeming way of getting someone's name). "Sarah", she replied. I took her hand in a regular handshake and then covered it with my other hand (the so-called "continental" handshake; I read somewhere it comes off as more sincere-seeming). "Nice to meet you," I said, smiling. We talked on, through the rest of the flight, increasingly comfortable with each other's company it seemed. At the end, I used the recommended, " So listen how can we continue this conversation once we're back on the ground??" She said, " Ugh....ya know......unfortunately I probably can't. I'm married." I paused , as though to let that sink in, then I decided, well she's married, and after all she's not that big of a deal looks-wise, so F it I might as well go into something more like what I think of as my "CON Juan" mode. I just kind of sighed and shook my head. She asked , "What?" I said, " You're married. I'm glad to hear that. Why wouldn't you be? It's just that , well, next week would have been my own third anniversary, so ironically I've got marriage on the mind lately. " She asked what had happened. I said, " My wife, may she rest in peace, used to tell me she wanted me to go on. To do things. To not be afraid of life." She of course asked what had happened. To which I replied that my wife and I had met very early on in med school ( I didn't even finish college in reality) and I described our "whirlwind affair" (I actually used those words believe it or not) and I told Sarah that "my wife" had gone to the Republic of Congo to treat tropical diseases amongst the Ituri pygmy tribes. "Ever the idealist, " I said, " Well, she ended up pricked with an infected needle, in a makeshift hospital in the jungle, and , well, you can pretty much guess the rest. I got down there, as soon as I could, they were treating her at some god-forsaken hospital in Brazzaville, I remember it was around Christmas time, but it didn't even feel like it; it was hotter than hell. And I basically just stayed there with her, at her bedside. I read to her. Hemingway. She didn't make it to see the new year. So, to make a long story short, I left Africa, shortly after that. When I got back here I got out of medicine entirely, had to really, and went into what it is I do now." Asked what that was I told her I'm now a "buyer" for Playboy. "Big career change," she said. The culmination of all this chicanery was that she said, as we were "de-planing" actually, "I'd like to hear more about Africa. " I had left it go cold pretty much after her, "big career change" comment. We'd just sat there. I wanted her to digest the story. She said, "Let me give you my cell number, ok?" I resisted and said, "God no. I don't want to cause any problems, or anything !" She said, "Well what?? It's not like you're doing anything WRONG ! I mean we can meet for coffee or a snack or something sometime , downtown. I work in the city and I take long lunches. " Thus she number-closed herself. I have no idea whether or not I will ever use it however. I'm not sure that I really want to risk being the "other guy" , if it were to go that way, which IS incidentally the vibe I was getting, with a married broad.
But it's not all successes here in this "FR". I tried running a two-set at a local sports bar earlier tonight, and botched it up horribly. Started off weak, started feeling weakER when I felt the whole thing just sort of slipping out of my control (anybody know that feeling??) , and eventually got a double walk-off. Harsh. Well, win some lose some.
Overall , I'm feeling good though. The "old" me wouldn't have done ANYthing in either of those situations I just described. I guess , as we've said here before, that represents the overall greater and more important success.
~Dino~
But it's not all successes here in this "FR". I tried running a two-set at a local sports bar earlier tonight, and botched it up horribly. Started off weak, started feeling weakER when I felt the whole thing just sort of slipping out of my control (anybody know that feeling??) , and eventually got a double walk-off. Harsh. Well, win some lose some.
Overall , I'm feeling good though. The "old" me wouldn't have done ANYthing in either of those situations I just described. I guess , as we've said here before, that represents the overall greater and more important success.
~Dino~
