"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Reasons for being here

LuisGarcia10

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2004
Messages
310
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9
Location
England
I joined this site years ago because I wanted a girlfriend, and for the life of me couldn't go about getting one;

Recently I had a girlfriend, of only 3 months but I genuinely liked the girl, and surprise, surprise, dumped (twice in fact but I gave her a second chance.) Now I don't want to go into it and I don't want a load of ****e about being an AFC, I have my own ideas over what I did wrong but I honestly wasn't jealous, clingy etc, in fact she was accusing me of liking other girls (even though she was wrong.) I don't get oneitis very often, but I'm struggling to forget her, but that will come, i haven't spoken to her since Sunday now and it's getting better.

Now I look around and see approach jorunals, stories etc of guys seeing like 2 or 3 girls at once. I genuinely don't want that, not because I necessarily expect to marry every girl I meet, just think I am not the kind of person who wants to go out seeing different women every night. I just want one decent girl who I love and loves me back, you'd think it would be simple but apparently not!

Am I the only person on here with that attitude? I'm not having a go at it, it's fine by me if you want to do that, but I'm just genuinely curious! Basically my current worry, and I know this sounds pathetic so please feel free to slap me, but it took me ages to find my last girlfriend, and I really do not want it to take ages to find the next one.

I'm probably being melodramtic seeing as it's been only a week since I split up with my girlfriend, but does anyone else feel like this? I just want to be seeing someone else quickly and forget about her, but it seems a million miles away at the moment.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Swift Shadow

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2010
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39
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1
Hang in there buddy i'm in the same boat, it's been a week since me and my girlfriend split (i took her back a second time) and i'm finding it difficult.

I'm the kind of guy that enjoys long term relationships, i welcome a ONS but it's not as fulfilling to me, i'm using this anger over the split to motivate and improve myself.

My advice is to not break the NC rule, don't try and contact her in any way, don't look at any pictures you may have or any old texts she may have sent you, i know it's hard but at the end of the day she dumped you why should you want to cling onto her memory when she made you feel like crap.
 

Myrrdin

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2010
Messages
123
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5
Location
Middle of Nowhere
Here's the catch. Why you need to see more women. EXPERIENCE!!! There's nothing else like it. You may read, discuss whatever but there's nothing like the real thing. You need to fail. So that you may rise up even higher.

You don't have to close all the women you're dating. Just have a good time. Learn to be natural around them and not feel like an outsider.

You need all of this to get "ONE" of them that might be compatible with you. Why? Because once you find one of these, on with whom you just click and are compatible you will know how to get her and how to keep her. If you don't have experience how will you be able to do it?

Cheers
 

LuisGarcia10

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2004
Messages
310
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9
Location
England
Yeah I know, I agree with you and I wouldn't take her back anyway out of self-respect. My mates would think I'm an idiot taking her back for the third time anyway. Like I say I'm struggling at the minute but it will be fine in the end.

That wasn't really the problem of my post, it's just about finding another one really. I know as soon as I meet another girl that I like, and start doing the things I did with my ex again, then the feelings will pass and I'll be fine again, probably happier in fact to know that she's out screwing somebody else's head up.

My point is that it just seems so ****ing hard to meet new girls atm, just worried it's going to be another couple years really!
 

Nemic

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2010
Messages
58
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1
Location
TN
Experience is the key. You have to enjoy all aspects of the game of dating to find any LTRs to begin with. I think you don't enjoy the game part due to lack of experience and it continues to intimidate you, and its much easier to find a chick with IL, date her, LTR her, and never really learn how you got her in the first place to begin to know how to keep her.

I tell myself I like LTR, but I think I tell myself that cause I am just afraid of trying to get rejected. So Mind over matter. I tell myself I don't want an LTR, I want lots of short timers to get some experience so I can better find a good LTR in the future.

Something I told myself eons ago that holds true in most situations.
"Whoever cares the least holds the most power"

Its not hard to meet women, we just make it hard on ourselves to do so. I see myself do it all the damn time. Examples of stupid **** I do in my head. (why Inner game is so important)
Chicks in a Store: "Shes busy and doesn't want to be interrupted"
Chicks sitting alone: "She must be waiting on a BF"

The only time I've ever gotten a woman with these thoughts is when I meet someone from a social circle that I *KNOW* is single, and make it a point to flirt with.

I need to just Man Up, and personally I'm doing so by telling myself she is single unless I see a ring set. Its pathic now that I think about it. I'm more worried shes taken then if she even likes me. I KNOW she will like me, so now its just a matter of conversing, getting experience and getting those damn digits!

MAKE THE HO SAY NO!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Zarky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2010
Messages
3,213
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89
Location
SoCal
I'm here because it keeps me interested in the game. Sometimes I get lazy and stop searching for new sex bunnies and just bang the same girls over and over. Then I come here, read and talk, and it gets my interest back up.
 

Chickfight

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2010
Messages
477
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30
Yeah, I believe there is a perfect girl for everyone. Unfortunately, you'll have to go through a lot of girls to find her.
 

Relations

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 2, 2009
Messages
42
Reaction score
1
Fvck people

Why do I hate people so much? I fvcking despise these evolved apes that claim sentience gives them purpose in life. They are worthless to me and they make me angry. I'm sick of this bullsh!t. Fvck everything.
 
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