"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Really Need Some Honest Advice...

AverageJoe5

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Bascially I became the person I wanted and the DJ I wanted to be a few months back. Ended up with some girl, but s*** turned sour and I ended up wasting six months of my life it feels like. Now I feel lost, insecure, and really unsure of myself and who I am now. I want to be that person again, but it seems like part of myself is stopping me. Idk. I just need some advice from anyone who felt like this and was able to get above it. Here's some information about myself. Starting second semister of first year of college, good looking, can be social and all that stuff but don't feel the motivation to, want to but then feel unsure of myself. Idk what to do anymore. So I figure might as well as ask for some advice. Thanks.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Cloudtopsun2100

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now is maybe the time you would rather sit at home and get real good at world of warcraft.. but thats like consoling yourself with the bottle.. you need to stay out there socializing and doing your thing.... good things will slowly happen - it will be hard at first but like a snowball it will get bigger and bigger faster and faster.. work hard now and in a month you will be back in your "game"

some things to do are to take up a sport-- start working out whatever... maybe even studying up on a foreign language.
 
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AverageJoe5 said:
Now I feel lost, insecure, and really unsure of myself and who I am now.
Your security and confidence is based on having a girl -- this is a no no!!! Have a greater purpose in life!!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Last Man Standing said:
Your security and confidence is based on having a girl -- this is a no no!!! Have a greater purpose in life!!
I second that.
 

ye yeah

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I agree as well,i was in that same situation.. i let a one itis dominate my life for 4 months,till the point my friends thought i was depressed.. i found a passion,a particular hobbie,and devoted myself to it.. and a year later,im a different person.. and im going places.

you need to find a passion or a role model or an inspiration to do something in life,whatever you wanna do... think about you and nothing but you.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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AverageJoe5

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Thanks. Feels like I've really been letting myself down in life. Got to step up. Seems like I spend so much time wondering what the problem is and how I got there when I should really focus on fixing the problem and moving on. Kind of always been a problem of mine dwelling on the past mistakes and judging myself too hard. I know that's what keeps me from achieving that status I had. The real problem is not that I can't do the stuff, it's weird. In my head part if me feels like I was great, but I went and ****ed it up, and I can never achieve that level again. Guess I just have to suck it up, remind myself who I really am, and just do it.
 

jamescr73

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i feel ya brother. I got out of a 3 year relationship that ended pretty badly, back in August. It took me a month or so to get out of the slump, but now ive got a list of girls, and things are getting better by the day. When you start to think about the girl you were with, think about the bad parts of the relationship and how you didnt need that crap in your life, and how youll find a better girl the next go around. Thats what i had to do to finally get out of the slump and get back out there.
And the other guys are right. Dont base your confidence level off how many girls you have in your life, base it off everything else in your life. Your carrer, your accomplishments, etc. The girls will fall in place when your confident the rest of your life is working for you. And in the mean time, go to a bowling alley and get some numbers.
 
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