"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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really need help here. PLEASE CHECK THIS OUT

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Don Juan
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ok first of all, please no insults or anything.
ive been dating this girl for 2 years now and it was the best, we were best friends and we did everyting together but recently ( last six month ) she began to take me for granted and i felt really used, so i was talking to couple other girls, she found out but thought that ive been cheating on her with them, so she asked for a break, and i broke up with her. Then i began to act really messed up to her ( i wasnt there for her ) ignored her calls and put her last on my list. This went on for about a month, and then one day i realized i still wanted to make it work, but when i ran back she didnt want me anymore and she had a crush on some guy who WAS there for her while i wasnt. she says she still loves me and later on she doesnt know whats going to happen so maybe we can still get back together, but i dont know what to do. please guys help me out. should i act like im interested in another girl to make her think shes really losing me so she'll come back? or just play the patience card, and be her friend till she's ready.
note: she sed " when im ready, you're the first person im going to turn to "
she sed she didnt want to " put up with all the **** in a relationship" right now

please guys its been couple months and i cant eat,sleep or go out and have fun, my college classes are **** to me and i keep missing work. PLEASE GUYS, ill do whatever it takes, just help me out here.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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skip2mylou781

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DEFINITELY make her think that she'll lose u forever, its the thing i DIDNT do after my last breakup that woulda saved me, but instaed i acted like i would always be there for her, and yup i lost her!

for ONE day, i made her believ she might lose me, and she ended up callin me and tellin me she misses me and wants to see me, then when i saw her, i blew it by tellin her i love her

lesson - make her think she'll lose u forever unless she takes actioN!
 

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ok now, so what do i do? do i let her know that i am? or what should i pick up her calls? or what? what should i say/do. tell me EXACTLY what to do.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Don Juan
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yea, this advice isnt really helping?. can i please get some real advice on how to GET HER BACK? not disses to make me feel worse thanks
 

skip2mylou781

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there r threads in the tips section on how to get an ex back, go search for it

basically u need to make her afraid to lose u, but at the same time let her know u have feelings for her but are willing to walk away
 

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thanks a lot lou. i know i need to suck it up, but theres things that i cant let go, **** weve been through, she literally saved my life ( not from myself ) and i saved hers and well, we were engaged btw.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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Her'es my advice and this will be a tough pill for you to swallow, but in the long run you'll be better off.

You sorta screwed up.... not totally, but by being aloof for a while then suddenly coming back to her, you shifted the control. And look what happened when you did that... She doesn't want you anymore.

Cut off all contact with her, indefinitely. Tell her if she really wants to work things out, to give you a call; otherwise tell her you're not gonna wait around for her to make up her mind.

That's all there is to it... she's the one who's creating all this drama and you're letting her do it. Stop that sh!t by not talking to her, at all. Not even a "hello, how are you? " nothing.. give her nothing.

If she really loves you, she'll come back.
 

skip2mylou781

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formation said:
thanks a lot lou. i know i need to suck it up, but theres things that i cant let go, **** weve been through, she literally saved my life ( not from myself ) and i saved hers and well, we were engaged btw.

how old are u 2?

u cant b a jerk in this case, u have to let her kno u love her and all that, but u cant be needy/insecure, u need to show her u WOULD or CAN walk away.....if she loves u, she wont LET u walk away.....and if shes a *****, she'll just let u walk away and that'll b that, in which case she wouldnt have been worth it anyway
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Don Juan
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so if she calls me to just " talk " should i just tell her im busy and or say " i told you, when your ready to work things out THEN call me "
 

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im 21 she was 20 shes turnin 21 in couple weeks. so if she calls to TALK what should i say
 

snbatman

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formation said:
thanks a lot lou. i know i need to suck it up, but theres things that i cant let go, **** weve been through, she literally saved my life ( not from myself ) and i saved hers and well, we were engaged btw.
Well, it seems, maybe the relationship is based on false, yet understandable feelings of obligation. Maybe she feels, deep down, that she was only really with you because she felt that she "should" be with you since she saved your life and you saved hers?

I don't really know man, but this isn't healthy for you or her. I wouldn't play "games" here. Lay it all out on the line, this isn't some girl you met in a bar or club for 5 minutes are just trying to go to bed with. This is someone you have history with and that you really do care about.

Try the games if you want, but only you can truley know what the right path is in this situation.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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formation said:
im 21 she was 20 shes turnin 21 in couple weeks. so if she calls to TALK what should i say
You say this:

"I want you to be 100% honest with me, and tell me why you're calling. If it's just to chit-chat then I'm not interested in that... but if you really want to work this thing out, I do too and we should meet up and talk about this in person. "
 

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heres the thing, shes very .. i dont know the word, wait yes i do " *****y" she gets angry easily and when shes frusterated, all hell breaks loose. when ive tried to open up to her, she doesnt really want to here it because it makes her feel guilty that im sad. and i dont want her to run back to me out of pity...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Krang!

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formation said:
heres the thing, shes very .. i dont know the word, wait yes i do " *****y" she gets angry easily and when shes frusterated, all hell breaks loose. when ive tried to open up to her, she doesnt really want to here it because it makes her feel guilty that im sad. and i dont want her to run back to me out of pity...
Dude - that's just wrong. :nono: When YOU try to open up to HER SHE doesn't want to hear it because it makes her sad!!?? wtf - read that again man, as long as she has that power nothing is gonna work.

Be a man - don't play games, tell her you are willing to invest in her if she will do the same with you but anything less is unacceptable to you. And hey - she will most likely leave you and you will be better off. Meet other girls, concentrate on school. It WILL be HARD but this isn't healthy for you - don't let this girl have so much power over you. Lay down the law then forget her...
 

skip2mylou781

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i got a feeling u were AFC in this relationship cuz she acts like shes all that and has command over u....u need to change that by yes, LAYING DOWN THE LAW
 

snbatman

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AngelusPUA said:
He happily broke up with her because he was sure he could get someone else but he couldn’t and then he went crawling back.......... he is a moron
Yea, good call. I reread his original post again and that's exactly what went down.

What a loser.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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