"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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really confused with this girl..plz tell me what to do

D

dabo

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I am really new in dating stuff.. anywayz this is how my story goes..I have been friend to this chick for the last 8 months...she lives in another city,so i talk to her online(3-4 times a week).we usually talk about everything and long(2-3 hours)...

anywayz for two months ago i travelled to the city where she lives,to visit her and some other friends of mine...that is when i start to fall for her.she seemed like she was into me too...after i left the city i told her that i felt something for her and she was fine with it.so we started to take our friendship to another level..and everything seemed just fine until this happened:somebody(the guy she once had crush on) called her,while i was chating with her.then she was like she wants to talk to him now and get back to me later on if i dont go to sleep.i really got pissed and told her that if she prefered to talk to him then it was just fine and i got offline.

then i ignored her for some time(4-5days) ..she would write me something when she saw me online but i didnt answer back....after awhile i desided to talk to her again and take things slowly.

anywayz when she then asked me why i ignored her for sometimes,i told her that i was busy with some other things..since then she starts to act differently... ,she starts to get online less and less(like once a week and then once in two weeks)and when she got online she wouldnt talk to me like before..whenever i ask her why she doesnt get online that much anymore..she would tell me that she was busy with jobb and stuff.

anywayz she continued to act like this until her birthday(i sent her a funny and friendly card to her)but then things just got even to the worst..she completly stopped talking to me even though i wrote to her whenever she was online..I sent her a card saying that i missed talking to her and stuff and she didnt even answer back.....now i havent talk to her for one month.so to be hounst i dont get this girl.....has she maybe lost interest in me?plz guyz tell me ..shall i just forget this girl and move on?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Q

Qualtran

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Originally posted by dabo
has she maybe lost interest in me?plz guyz tell me ..shall i just forget this girl and move on?
Click to expand...
Yes, Yes.

Complete waste of time and effort to spend another second thinking of her.
 
T

TillTheEndOfTime

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Take this as a lesson to not be a friend for so long. It usually works against you.
 
R

Revolution_AM

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You probably shouldn't have gotten in a big huff over her talking to the other guy - don't ever give her a reason to be mad at you, just give her reasons to be more interested in you.

"when she got online she wouldnt talk to me like before..whenever i ask her why she doesnt get online that much anymore..she would tell me that she was busy with jobb and stuff."

She called your bluff, buddy, and then she used your tactic on yourself. And you fell for it! As she retreated, you pursued her further - the exact opposite you should have done. What you really should have done was stick with your tactic of only talking to her rarely, and if an IM of yours went unanswered, then you wouldn't IM her until she IMed you - because the ball was in her court. And if she never started talking to you again, all the better - you have better women to be pursuing, ones that DO show interest in you.
 
N

NRM

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Are you sure you were ever in a relationship with this girl?

You said that you told her you had feelings for her and she was fine with it. Doesn't sound like you asked for commitment, what else could she say? No, you don't?

I'm starting to have a feeling you created a whole drama-filled relationship in your head.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I

IsiMan84

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He does have a good point there. I just realized you didn't say anything about how she felt for you in that sentence. Either way you shoulda waited for her to say she was interested in you, cause it looked like you got the one-itis and she took over from there.
 
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