I think ive got some pretty deep issues when it comes to girls...
Bit of background.
I was the 'loser' type in school. I mean I had friends but I was always focused on my final exams and school work. I could have gone to parties but I chose not too. I didnt drink, smoke, take drugs, nor was a I worried at all about girls. As far as appearance went I was f*****. I was the smallest in my year, very skinny, pasty, bad skin, braces, short hair ect. I was the stereotypical nerd without the glasses. I was constantly told I would never get a girlfriend or anything like that. What made it worse is that I believed it.
Anyway I left for university/college and ended up having a good look at my self. I always knew what I wanted to look like/ become. So over the next 1 and a half years after leaving school I essentially transformed my self. Part of it was due to oneitis. Never did anyting about it because i knew i was not good enough.
I started lifting weights, took up martial arts again after years away form it and went running. I grew as well and ended up being a pretty decent height with sports trainer sort of body. Im not huge but im not skinny either. My face cleared up, i got a tan and the braces came off. Got my motorbike licence as well. To cut to the chase I look totally different from what I was. To the extent where people I went to school with for 10 years dont even recognise me. Even some of my friends I hadnt seen for years couldnt get over how mych different i was. The change during uni was pretty dramatic as well. There were a couple of girls that went from not even giving me a second look to being shy around me. (Thanks to you blokes on this forum)
To my problems...
Basically Im still in the mindset that Im not good enough. I tend to get oneitis a bit for girls and picture their perfect sort of guy. The sort of guy I eventually want to become. This tends to lead me to start training; running, boxing and weights.
I dont think Im useless with girls, I can make friends with them pretty easily. I can flirt and muck around with no problems. I have had plenty of girls hit on me, not bragging or anything. Ive had girls ask me for my number, so I dont think im totally unattractive. The thing is I dont know what to do... Its the sort of stuff I should have been learning and doing at school not uni.
Im still very insecure as well and i dont know how to fix it. When a very good looking girl starts talking to me or being friendly, I tend to put up walls or be a ****. (I try to drive them away by doing it but it doesnt seem to work) I instantly assume they want something from me to the point that I even avoid becoming friends with them.
In summary im pretty lost... I just want the magic bullet to put it all together or get over my insecurity.
Thanks
Bit of background.
I was the 'loser' type in school. I mean I had friends but I was always focused on my final exams and school work. I could have gone to parties but I chose not too. I didnt drink, smoke, take drugs, nor was a I worried at all about girls. As far as appearance went I was f*****. I was the smallest in my year, very skinny, pasty, bad skin, braces, short hair ect. I was the stereotypical nerd without the glasses. I was constantly told I would never get a girlfriend or anything like that. What made it worse is that I believed it.
Anyway I left for university/college and ended up having a good look at my self. I always knew what I wanted to look like/ become. So over the next 1 and a half years after leaving school I essentially transformed my self. Part of it was due to oneitis. Never did anyting about it because i knew i was not good enough.
I started lifting weights, took up martial arts again after years away form it and went running. I grew as well and ended up being a pretty decent height with sports trainer sort of body. Im not huge but im not skinny either. My face cleared up, i got a tan and the braces came off. Got my motorbike licence as well. To cut to the chase I look totally different from what I was. To the extent where people I went to school with for 10 years dont even recognise me. Even some of my friends I hadnt seen for years couldnt get over how mych different i was. The change during uni was pretty dramatic as well. There were a couple of girls that went from not even giving me a second look to being shy around me. (Thanks to you blokes on this forum)
To my problems...
Basically Im still in the mindset that Im not good enough. I tend to get oneitis a bit for girls and picture their perfect sort of guy. The sort of guy I eventually want to become. This tends to lead me to start training; running, boxing and weights.
I dont think Im useless with girls, I can make friends with them pretty easily. I can flirt and muck around with no problems. I have had plenty of girls hit on me, not bragging or anything. Ive had girls ask me for my number, so I dont think im totally unattractive. The thing is I dont know what to do... Its the sort of stuff I should have been learning and doing at school not uni.
Im still very insecure as well and i dont know how to fix it. When a very good looking girl starts talking to me or being friendly, I tend to put up walls or be a ****. (I try to drive them away by doing it but it doesnt seem to work) I instantly assume they want something from me to the point that I even avoid becoming friends with them.
In summary im pretty lost... I just want the magic bullet to put it all together or get over my insecurity.
Thanks