Real help needed! OCD - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

[tripleplay]

I had many goals when I first got involved in this community. One I them had nothing really to do with getting girls, but, obviously, it could play an indirect part if I can get a grip on this. So...

I've never posted about this on an internet forum. And, to be honest, only my close family really know I suffer from this.

I've never actually been diagnosed with this condition, but I self-diagnosed myself years ago as having OCD - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. For as long as I can remember (going back to my early teens, I guess) I have been plauged with feeling like I HAVE to do certain things - these things range from having to count letters or words on a page, to having to walk through doorways more than once or turn lights on and off. Not always, but sometimes.

These sequences normally involve the numbers 2 and 3 - most often 3 and multiples of the number 3. Often I'll end up doing all sorts of sums and sequences with these numbers.

Obviously this stuff is REALLY distracting sometimes, and, over the years, I've probably wasted a helluva lot of time with it. It effects me most when I'm on my own - I seem to be able to control it somewhat when I'm around other people (I can imagine it would look VERY weird if other people saw me do these things). Hence why I've been able to keep this a secret for so long.

I think it does affect me quite a lot, and I reckon it prevents me from having a COMPLETELY normal life. I've never really researched into it that much, I always put it aside over the years and thought it's not really a big deal. But I'm starting to tackle all sorts of inner game issues now (since finding the community) and I think this is all linked in with anxiety and inner game struggles.

You see, I feel like if I don't do these obsessive compulsive number things (the light switches and touching things multiple times, etc) then bad things will happen. This can range from me getting a disease, right up to a loved one dying or something. This becomes much worse in high tension situations, like when I'm waiting for an exam result or something. Anything important and the OCD becomes a lot more pronounced.

I feel sometimes that I can actually CONTROL the outcome of certain things clearly outside of my control - like sporting events, for instance. If I'm watching a game with my team playing on TV or something, I'll feel like I have to touch the floor 3 times or they'll concede a goal or whatever.

I know it sounds really crazy.

If I really focus all the time, I can get a grip on it and stop doing this things. But it requires maximum concentration nearly all the time! I'm worried that this is such an ingrained habit, repeated over so many years, that it'll be really difficult to get rid of forever.

So I want to know if anyone else has experienced this? Can you give any advice? Are they things I can do to cure this? Hypnosis, maybe? Do you have links to any helpful articles/websites?

Any help would be much appreciated. It feels good to get this problem off my chest.

Thanks in advance,

 

[Eccentric]

In all honesty your best bet is to see your doctor and explain what your feeling and going through. Obviously he's not a therapist, but he will probably put you on Prozac or something similar to help you relax for a while.

 

[tripleplay]

In all honesty your best bet is to see your doctor and explain what your feeling and going through. Obviously he's not a therapist, but he will probably put you on Prozac or something similar to help you relax for a while.

Thanks for the reply.

However, I'd rather overcome this problem without the use of any kind of medication. I wonder if that's possible.

 

[ready123]

I have a mild case of Tourette, linked to OCD, so I know what you're going through. Go see a psychiatrist or neurologist and try medication. If you don't like it, you don't have to continue. It's just a neuro-chemical imbalance

And don't backwards rationalize your failures as caused by the disorder. Look at Howie Mandell

 

[Bible_Belt]

I am usually very against meds, but if your OCD is keeping you from living a normal life, Paxil has helped a lot of people. My ex-gf used to stay home on weekends to organize her sock drawer; Paxil helped make the OCD manageable.

 

[Obsidian]

I've had similar problems, but you obviously haven't researched the disease at all if you're bothering to ask this question. Look up OCD and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and then do the therapy on yourself. It will probably take a while before you start to really get a hang of your condition, but within a year or so I predict you'll be way better off.

 

[Potbelly]

Er....wtf? Some of the stuff you described I can easily see in myself. I like to blow off eraser shavings 2-3 times after erasing something...just to make sure it's clean lol.

STOP DIAGNOSING YOURSELF MAN, DAMN YOU DON'T HAVE AS MANY PROBLEMS AS YOU THINK YOU DO

 

[PrinceBeavis]

I sure am no doctor....but, what if you looked closely at the fear...what if you embraced it, sort of viewed it as strapping yourself into a rollercoaster? You know, that whole "feel the fear, and do it anyways" / "Make fear your friend" thing? Sort of..."so you're afraid? I'll show you 'afraid'!" Just willfully climb in, pull the bar down, and ride it out.... like it or not, the outcome is still positive..
It's like, if you're the one who is actively inducing fear, that sort of makes you the master of fear, and so able to control the fear.

....hell....I could use doing that myself.

 

[DJVladdy]

hello guys.
I'll be the first to admit that i'm kind of like you, in a way that I went to my doctor, TOLD her i think i have ADD, and convinced her to prescribe me adderall. So yea i get drugs legally because I made up an illness for myself

Bro, don't bullsh1t me, the rest of the guys... and especially don't bullsh1t YOURSELF. Two things are happening here:

1. You are convincing yourself that you have a pseudo-semi-real disorder, so to speak; because I do not believe in OCD, anxiety, or depression are ILLNESSES. They are personality flaws meaning you should get your sh1t together.

2. You are looking for a disorder to have. I went through that phase when I was about to go to a therapist for prozac or paxil because i felt very depressed and had some social anxiety symptoms. I did not to that, because I told myself the magic words: "Vlad, man the fvck up". I suggest you do the same bro.

 

[ready123]

practice what you preach

before you preach

and OCD is not a personality flaw

 

[DJVladdy]

ok, Mr bipolar

 

[DJVladdy]

But seriously, ready I DO practice...
Because ive been in his situation and I've dealt with it. And the first thing I said, I just wanted to get some stimulants that I otherwise would get on the street, you feel me? So yea i guess that was kind of a random intro lol.

 

[tripleplay]

Hey DJVladdy,

You're way off base here, man.

If you read my posts, I mention, on more than one occasion, that I don't want to pursue medication to get rid of my OCD. I want to do it without the use of drugs! That's why I find the suggestions for alternative methods (such as Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, NLP, etc) so interesting. So in what way am I trying to get drugs that I don't need?

I'm not making up a disorder. Like you, I do see it as more of a personality flaw. That is why I posted it HERE, as opposed to going to a specialist with it! I feel it's an inner game issue (read my post again!), so, therefore, the community can help me with it.

I have never taken ANY kind of medication for a personality flaw. There are other ways to overcome these things. Hence why I posted this here.

Your attempts to AMOG me come off ridiculous, especially considering the context.

I'm seeking help here WITHOUT going to a specialist and making a huge deal out of it. You should be able to respect that.

Cheers for the feedback,

1. You are convincing yourself that you have a pseudo-semi-real disorder, so to speak; because I do not believe in OCD, anxiety, or depression are ILLNESSES. They are personality flaws meaning you should get your sh1t together.

2. You are looking for a disorder to have. I went through that phase when I was about to go to a therapist for prozac or paxil because i felt very depressed and had some social anxiety symptoms. I did not to that, because I told myself the magic words: "Vlad, man the fvck up". I suggest you do the same bro.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Like you, I do see it as more of a personality flaw.

A personality disorder is not a flaw; you're just different. Trying to be "normal" is like trying to teach a left-handed person to be right-handed; it's an outdated idea and a waste of time.

Personality disorders are not flaws, because they make you do some things better. OCD gives you a great attention to detail, if you can just obsess over productive aspects. I know an electrician whose work looks like it is being photographed for a book each time, yet he won't stand in sawdust to work - everything has to be clean b/c he has ocd. Yet, it seems wrong to say that his disability makes him do better work. It's not a disability, just a difference.

 

[warrior1]

hey tripleplay have the EXACT SAME problem as you. With walking though dooors a few times and flicking light switches. I still do that occcaasionally. I had to do tihngs in multiples of 8. I also had to keep at looking at the clock b4 i sleep. For instance i remembered whebn i wasd younger, the last time i have to see whether it was 11XX pm or 1XXam had to be 09, 21, 31, 43 or 51. If the clock turns to 122... i have to wait and go to sleep at 131.

 

[Obsidian]

Bible Belt, what you said makes sense in theory, but in reality, OCD almost entirely focuses your energy on wasting time rather than doing anything productive. People who wash their hands a lot are about the closest to what you're saying. But really, even those people are wasting time, chapping up their hands unnecessarily, wasting soap and water, etc. When I take multiple choice tests, for example, I usually have to focus really hard on what I'm doing and check everything over a whole lot to make sure I'm filling in the right bubbles (and sometimes consciously move on even though I'd feel like being more cautious). But while that might seem like just high caution, I really think the anxiety of it disrupts my concentration on the test as a whole and causes me to waste time doing needless checking. So overall, I don't think there's anything to be proud of with regard to having one of these conditions.

And tripleplay's insistence on overcoming his issues without drugs is understandable. For the most part, it's thoughts that cause mental illness. The answer therefore isn't chemicals but corrected thinking.

Overall, I think CBT combined with DJism will really overcome most of the disease. I've really gotten over most of my mental issues since escaping from the matrix.

 

[PrinceBeavis]

Keep it up, dude.

 

[tripleplay]

It's great to read other people's accounts of their similar problems. So thanks a lot for that, guys. As well as all the other advice in this thread. You've been great.

I guess this is the online equivalent of making the sufferer aware that other people suffer to, so as to ease his suffering with a comparison of situations.

It does ease it somewhat when you have other people's experiences right there for you to compare to yours. You begin to realise you're not alone in all this. I certainly think there are different levels to this whole thing, though. I'm going to start using this frame about finding it interesting and funny how these weird things work. I'm going to get curious!

I've been working really hard over the last few days trying to keep a handle on this thing. Like I said in the first post of this thread, it takes massive concentration, but I think it'll get easier as I gradually overcome and break through the habit. Like I've said already, I want to beat this without the use of medication!

One thing I will say: Over the last few days, I've really been getting a grip on the problem. It's required a lot of focus, but it's an incredibly liberating feeling when you take CONTROL and don't listen to the impulses telling you that you have to do something. It's like this amazing, self-created and completely new power!

It really is a powerful feeling. I'm working now to turn this into a strength, rather than a weakness.

 

[Desert Fox]

Wow you think you have OCD? I might have it, I walk downstairs, think I didn't lock the door and I go back and check the lock...happens a lot.

Could be OCD, or it could be I DON'T WANT MY SH1T STOLEN.

Relax bro, you are a normal guy and you are maybe a little superstitious. You think you're crazy? What about those nutjobs who pray whenever something bad happens like it'll make a difference? What about those indian rain dances that do jack sh1t? What about all those other bullsh1t beliefs?

Relax relax relax, compared to the average person you are more normal than them and they still think they're normal.



As for me the only OCD thing I can think of is on exams where you bubble in the answers, I blow away the excess eraser shavings and lead particles after EVERY ANSWER. Then I go back and erase around the edges of each oval or circle like a madman. After that I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS have to rub my erase on the desk until the black smudges come off and it's perfectly clean.

But I don't htink I have OCD and even if I did, who gives a **** I'm still smarter than 99% of my class so fvck it man. You're fine. good luck dealing with this PEACE!

 

[playerone]

Alright i know this is an old post. But just to clear up a few things on OCD. If you are constantly thinking of something, or counting numbers, switching the lights on and off, it does not mean you have OCD. Like many doubters said, they could be just keeping a good habit and making sure of things.

From an OCD point of view, these repetitive actions and overthinking are called "rituals". If you are having OCD, you won't feel like it's a NEED to do it. You know it is nonsensical and unnecessary. You know it is awkward if you do it under public's eyes. You want to stop doing these rituals. But you can't, and it is becoming an obsession. As a result, you may keep doing these rituals, hoping to relief yourself. However, it only provides temporary relief. After a while, you will realise that you are thinking about it again, and hence it makes you want do it over and over. It is going to drive you crazy, and maybe you can get panic attacks from doing so.

THAT is OCD, not because you're playing safe, being careful, or any crap reason that you make up.

If you are NOT having OCD, these rituals may be just good/bad habits. And usually you do not feel it is unnecessary or awkward. You do them, and you don't feel uncomfortable at all. That's the difference.