I came across this site earlier whilst searching for instinctive attraction. It's very insightful and will help the AFC's get off their seats.
http://www.faithfreedom.org/articles/free-thought/secret-to-women%E2%80%99s-heart/
Here are the main pointers I found to be interesting.
Attraction
In physics, attraction happens when two oppositely charged poles are drawn to each other. To distinguish between them we name them positive and negative, or north and south. The bigger the charge, the stronger is the polarity and more powerful will be the attraction. Conversely, the lesser the polarity, the weaker will be the attraction.
The polarity between man and woman is called masculinity and femininity. Women are attracted to masculine qualities and men, to feminine qualities. The mechanism that triggers attraction in humans is the same that triggers attraction in animals. Attraction takes place in our limbic system – the mammalian part of the brain.
The brain stem – the reptilian brain, is the most primitive part of human brain. It is responsible for instinctive behaviors such as self defense, aggression, territoriality, sexual attraction, mating rituals and reproduction. The brainstem controls also automatic bodily functions like breathing, sleep and blood flow.
The limbic system – the layer that surrounds the brainstem is what we share with mammals. It is responsible for strong emotions such as happiness, sadness, rage, disgust, hatred, and passionate love.
The cortex – the newest brain layer to evolve is the layer that covers the limbic system. It is unique to humans and is responsible for cognitive functioning. It is what enables us to be conscious, rational, moral, ethical and in contact with reality. It is the neo cortex that helps us find logic, order, and causality.
Love is Animalistic
In love and in our mating behavior we humans are animals. Attraction and love are controlled by our brainstem and limbic system. The best way to understand sexual attraction in humans is to observe them in our mammal cousins. Female mammals, including primates are attracted to dominant males of their species. In animal kingdom courtship is always preceded by a fight and show of strength between males. The male that proves to be stronger – the alpha male – is favored by females and gets the privilege to pass his genes.
If male animals are aggressive, it’s because aggression is prized and encouraged by females of all species. Herbivore males have no reason to be aggressive for obtaining food. It’s the female of their species that rewards their aggression.
Why is it important for the female that her mate be aggressive? It is because a male that can fight can protect her. The male aggression in animal kingdom is never directed towards females. The prophet of Islam who said, “beat your wife,” was less than animals. Females are protected by males. She is not intimidated by strong aggressive males because she knows that his strength will NEVER be used against her, but rather it will be her protection.
Feminine qualities in humans are: being sensitive, gentle, sympathetic, tender, understanding, warm, yielding, soft, nurturing, graceful, communicative, intuitive, emotional, homemaker, motherly, receptive, responsive, cooperative, conservative, relational, and family and inwardly oriented,
Masculine qualities are: being muscular, provider, protector, aloof, stoic, logical, analytical, rational, homebuilder, outspoken, active, assertive, aggressive, courageous, ambitious, initiating, competitive, decisive, dominant, forceful, independent, self-reliant, adventurous, risk taker, powerful, authoritative, and society and outwardly oriented,
These qualities are not better or worse. They are not superior or inferior. They are complementary. Think of the polarity in a magnetic field. The question of which pole is better is absurd. They must be of equal strength in order to create the magnetic field. The stronger is the polarity, the more powerful is the field.
Attraction is beyond reason. Love is not the function of the rational brain. The New Age subculture encourages men to be sensitive, tender, apologetic, appeasing and lovey-dovey. It is politically correct to be effeminate. But it is incorrect from the evolutionally stand point. It is unnatural, conducive to tension, resentment, disappointment and divorce.
When a man evinces female qualities, attraction disappears INSTANTLY. If you are a gay, do as you please, but if you are a man wanting to date a woman, be nice to her, take her to an expensive restaurant, lavish her with gifts, smile tenderly and approvingly at whatever she says, be soft and gentle, ogle at her and tell her how much you enjoy her company, be attentive to her every needs and whims, and you’ll fall from her eyes faster than a meteorite. These wussy behaviors undermine sexual polarity and kill the attraction.
Women have no control over whom they are attracted to. The same is true for men. Remember that attraction happens in the brainstem and love in the limbic system. Logic is the function of neo cortex. Neo cortex cannot override feelings that are generated in the layers beneath it. Attraction is sparked inside our reptilian brain. Brain mapping has definitely shown the location where attraction and love are generated. We fall in love through our animal nature, not with logic. Females of all species are attracted to strong, dominant alpha males. Why should it be different in humans? Only in insect world females are stronger. Unless you are a scorpion or a spider, I suggest you act like a primate and be a man to your woman.
This is very standard info, but sometimes it needs to be spelled out to people in order for it to work.
http://www.faithfreedom.org/articles/free-thought/secret-to-women%E2%80%99s-heart/
Here are the main pointers I found to be interesting.
Attraction
In physics, attraction happens when two oppositely charged poles are drawn to each other. To distinguish between them we name them positive and negative, or north and south. The bigger the charge, the stronger is the polarity and more powerful will be the attraction. Conversely, the lesser the polarity, the weaker will be the attraction.
The polarity between man and woman is called masculinity and femininity. Women are attracted to masculine qualities and men, to feminine qualities. The mechanism that triggers attraction in humans is the same that triggers attraction in animals. Attraction takes place in our limbic system – the mammalian part of the brain.
The brain stem – the reptilian brain, is the most primitive part of human brain. It is responsible for instinctive behaviors such as self defense, aggression, territoriality, sexual attraction, mating rituals and reproduction. The brainstem controls also automatic bodily functions like breathing, sleep and blood flow.
The limbic system – the layer that surrounds the brainstem is what we share with mammals. It is responsible for strong emotions such as happiness, sadness, rage, disgust, hatred, and passionate love.
The cortex – the newest brain layer to evolve is the layer that covers the limbic system. It is unique to humans and is responsible for cognitive functioning. It is what enables us to be conscious, rational, moral, ethical and in contact with reality. It is the neo cortex that helps us find logic, order, and causality.
Love is Animalistic
In love and in our mating behavior we humans are animals. Attraction and love are controlled by our brainstem and limbic system. The best way to understand sexual attraction in humans is to observe them in our mammal cousins. Female mammals, including primates are attracted to dominant males of their species. In animal kingdom courtship is always preceded by a fight and show of strength between males. The male that proves to be stronger – the alpha male – is favored by females and gets the privilege to pass his genes.
If male animals are aggressive, it’s because aggression is prized and encouraged by females of all species. Herbivore males have no reason to be aggressive for obtaining food. It’s the female of their species that rewards their aggression.
Why is it important for the female that her mate be aggressive? It is because a male that can fight can protect her. The male aggression in animal kingdom is never directed towards females. The prophet of Islam who said, “beat your wife,” was less than animals. Females are protected by males. She is not intimidated by strong aggressive males because she knows that his strength will NEVER be used against her, but rather it will be her protection.
Feminine qualities in humans are: being sensitive, gentle, sympathetic, tender, understanding, warm, yielding, soft, nurturing, graceful, communicative, intuitive, emotional, homemaker, motherly, receptive, responsive, cooperative, conservative, relational, and family and inwardly oriented,
Masculine qualities are: being muscular, provider, protector, aloof, stoic, logical, analytical, rational, homebuilder, outspoken, active, assertive, aggressive, courageous, ambitious, initiating, competitive, decisive, dominant, forceful, independent, self-reliant, adventurous, risk taker, powerful, authoritative, and society and outwardly oriented,
These qualities are not better or worse. They are not superior or inferior. They are complementary. Think of the polarity in a magnetic field. The question of which pole is better is absurd. They must be of equal strength in order to create the magnetic field. The stronger is the polarity, the more powerful is the field.
Attraction is beyond reason. Love is not the function of the rational brain. The New Age subculture encourages men to be sensitive, tender, apologetic, appeasing and lovey-dovey. It is politically correct to be effeminate. But it is incorrect from the evolutionally stand point. It is unnatural, conducive to tension, resentment, disappointment and divorce.
When a man evinces female qualities, attraction disappears INSTANTLY. If you are a gay, do as you please, but if you are a man wanting to date a woman, be nice to her, take her to an expensive restaurant, lavish her with gifts, smile tenderly and approvingly at whatever she says, be soft and gentle, ogle at her and tell her how much you enjoy her company, be attentive to her every needs and whims, and you’ll fall from her eyes faster than a meteorite. These wussy behaviors undermine sexual polarity and kill the attraction.
Women have no control over whom they are attracted to. The same is true for men. Remember that attraction happens in the brainstem and love in the limbic system. Logic is the function of neo cortex. Neo cortex cannot override feelings that are generated in the layers beneath it. Attraction is sparked inside our reptilian brain. Brain mapping has definitely shown the location where attraction and love are generated. We fall in love through our animal nature, not with logic. Females of all species are attracted to strong, dominant alpha males. Why should it be different in humans? Only in insect world females are stronger. Unless you are a scorpion or a spider, I suggest you act like a primate and be a man to your woman.
This is very standard info, but sometimes it needs to be spelled out to people in order for it to work.
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