Reached out to an old flame...how should I read this txt convo?

[R.U.G.]

So no more texts since the last update but now she keeps sending me pics of her cat every now and again LOL I haven't responded, I'll respond in a few hrs with something basic like 'looks like you two are getting along well!'. I mean what else can I do? I going to send her my d*ck pics in return hahaha - not that I've ever done that before, nor do I plan to. Nor can I say 'ok now let's see your other kitty instead'.

Time for my bike run...I need it to stop focusing on women so much and just friggn' get sh*t done like I was before I joined SS, now I'm post whoring like bigdave lol

Stop chasing and let her come to you. No more contact until she reaches out and types something. Unless you want a pen pal.. That is what it's going to turn in to.

 

[HankHill]

OK so she asked me what dates work next week, I told her two dates, she said either is fine so I picked Fri night. I'm really not sure what she's thinking, she may just want to have a platonic friendship or a lay who knows? I'm going to escalate by dropping some sexual comments, may be a trip down memory lane and some touching on the arm, hair etc. If she warms up great if not I think I need more female friends anyway. I've never been friends with my ex's and I'm realizing that surely boosted my ego but might not have been the best decision because who else knows you better than your ex? so might be worth it just for a chick's feedback on new relationships etc plus this is the only chick I never fell hard for so no big deal. Of course, as I said my goal is FWB but it's not all up to me.

 

[R.U.G.]

OK so she asked me what dates work next week, I told her two dates, she said either is fine so I picked Fri night. I'm really not sure what she's thinking, she may just want to have a platonic friendship or a lay who knows? I'm going to escalate by dropping some sexual comments, may be a trip down memory lane and some touching on the arm, hair etc. If she warms up great if not I think I need more female friends anyway. I've never been friends with my ex's and I'm realizing that surely boosted my ego but might not have been the best decision because who else knows you better than your ex? so might be worth it just for a chick's feedback on new relationships etc plus this is the only chick I never fell hard for so no big deal. Of course, as I said my goal is FWB but it's not all up to me.

You and memory lane with this chick aren't very good (I.E. remember the dead cat issue). It's best to just let things go naturally and not preplan anything. You will be a nervous fvck if you allow your mind to explore the what if scenarios. Just have everything ready. If she's coming to your place, have food, wine, and fresh condoms. Also, if you are good with massages, get some good quality massage oil. The massages are very easy for you to move into touching and then sex. It will come naturally as they will relax and bond with you touching her body in semi-intimate areas. This has always worked for me, but I've read up on this stuff. After about 10 - 15 minutes, ask to remove her bra, start massaging that area, turn her over and start massaging around the breast area. Soft messages and touches. If that is okay, move to the areolas down to the navel and the sides. There are some good Youtube videos on sensual massage. This Youtuber is really good:

https://www.youtube.com/user/MyTinySecretsTV

 

[HankHill]

Not THAT memory lol I meant things she liked to do in bed.

Knowing her she's likely going to ask a variation of these two questions:

1. Did I sleep with anyone since our breakup (6 mos ago). I did but even though I hate to lie not sure I want to admit this to her it's going to complicate things.

2. Am I dating etc. Again, I'm thinking of either saying yeah just went out on a couple of first dates, nothing serious or say I'm taking a break

What's the smarter response to these lol

 

[R.U.G.]

Not THAT memory lol I meant things she liked to do in bed.

Knowing her she's likely going to ask a variation of these two questions:

1. Did I sleep with anyone since our breakup (6 mos ago). I did but even though I hate to lie not sure I want to admit this to her it's going to complicate things.

2. Am I dating etc. Again, I'm thinking of either saying yeah just went out on a couple of first dates, nothing serious or say I'm taking a break

What's the smarter response to these lol

1) You know I don't kiss and tell with a smirk on your face, then jump to an interesting topic.

2) I'm testing the waters. Nothing serious yet, but I am keeping my options open with a cool smile/smirk.

Whatever you do, DON'T throw it back at her. Positive vibes and topics only. I know, this can be a hard task to accomplish, but you must stay light hearted and happy.

 

[strikerace13]

wow she gave you a opening with the vacation and you wimped out on it. She was seeing if you where the man or a wimp, to bad you choose the wimp.

 

[HankHill]

Huh? hahaha I don't know where you saw this opening you're referring to but regardless I'm not going to put my life on hold at the last min and invite myself on a vacation simply because she mentioned it. I have far more important things going on in my life to give my exes so much importance.
Note that we're meeting next week - she didn't want to meet on Sat and suggested this week, I suggested next week - again, because if she says jump I'm not going to ask how high.

 

[strikerace13]

She asked you about your plans for a vacation, which is a way to see if you are boring or fun. Which to a girl is about going to a new place and having fun and sex.

 

[HankHill]

I see what you're saying but also remember that this is not a new girl; she already knows me, what I do and how fun I am. She asked because she knows each summer I go to my vacation house but I didn't plan to this year so I told her I'm staying local instead, which is/was true. I could invite her to the said trip but again I don't want to go. I could make up some lie and say I will/did but I'm not going to do that.

In the end, we're seeing each other so mission accomplished

 

[strikerace13]

She found out everything she needed to know by what you said, as women love to know if there ex is worst off then when they left you. That's why I never go back to a ex ever, it ended for a reason. So if you haven't changed anything about yourself to a higher value male, then you are beating the same dead horse. She will find out your the same desperate person as before, because your going back to your ex and you have no skill to get someone new. She will keep you around till she gets someone better, then drop you like a brick. Your the only option she has right now, as she has no other better options right now.

 

[HankHill]

I guess I'm confused what your point is here? You're making a lot of assumptions including that she dumped me when it was the other way around. Two, I have no expectations nor can I see myself in a relationship with her. My only reason for reaching out as I said before was to see if FWB is in the cards and even if it's not I wouldn't mind having her around as a friend since I don't have feelings for her (and that's why I broke up with her).