"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Rape (Serious Question)

TheOneForce

Don Juan
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Hey serious question here :

About a year or so ago , my gf was raped by one of her friends when she went over to his house 2 see his sister. This was b4 we started goin out and she just told me earlier this week. For some reason she blames it on herself and i try 2 convince her that its not. The guy knew she was innocent, so he took advantage of her. She was all upset and cryin when she told me and said he raped her cuz she was bein a tease. (Which even if she was , thats no fvckin excuss, there is no excuss 4 rape :cuss: :mad: )

What can i do to assure her that it wasnt her fault and 2 stop talkin bad about her self ?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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AC/DC

Master Don Juan
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hyphy bay area, ca
Make her feel loved and cared about. DONT TALK ABOUT IT DIRECTLY UNLESS YOU NEED TO. Let her know you're there.
 

Mr_rogers

Senior Don Juan
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I'd do exactly what the above poster said, but remember, if things get too hairy and you just can't seem to convince her, get her some professional help, because rape can, and usually does screw people up for the rest of their lives.
 
Joined
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cuddle cuddle cuddle...

don't make any direct sexual advances without her full consent. dont try gunwitch here.

next her if something better comes along.

edit: don't try to be her psychiatrist anytime anywhere, show some sympathy, but don't try to solve any problems.
 

KillaCam

Master Don Juan
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Rape is a very serious occurance.

I concur with most of what has been said. Always keep the option of professional help open, as things like this can cause some serious mental and emotional damage.

I'm not sure how deep you are into this relationship, but being there is important. In saying that, you cannot let her become emotionally dependent on you, as healing is something that she needs to do personally.

You just gotta be there for her man. Normality will be difficult to achieve, but keep things simple with her, and hopefully the situation starts to head towards a more positive side.

Good luck.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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