"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Random thoughts on lust : Quagmire

Pandora

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I have some friends that are ruled by lust. I call them Quagmire archetypes. They are constantly in creep mode. They let sex ruin their lives. Some of these men are successful but have multiple "baby mommas". These are men of all races.

Ever since I got married I have forced myself to calm down. I am no where near as bad as I used to be. This allows me to self reflect. I see myself in these guys.

Once you go down the PUA route you can get stuck there. Being good with women is a gift and a curse. Once you crack the code it is difficult to go back.

I have one preppy friend that looks like a total yuppie. You would never suspect that he is a slave to his penis. He has a live in women but routinely prowls bars and clubs for young women. We are too old for that! He also routinely uses hookers domestic and international. His horniness knows no bounds lol. Other than that he is a great person.

I actually think a lot of lust is just female validation issues. Is it really the orgasm you are chasing or the approval from an attractive woman? I think it is the latter.

The problem with lust is that it cant be quenched. The more you try to satisfy it the bigger it grows. If you try to ignore it then it eventually mutates into something weird and it eventually explodes. Maybe the answer is balance.
 
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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crowolf

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Women's most powerful weapon is their appearance, sex appeal and seduction/mind games.

If a man decides to not be impressed by any of that (for example when he is focused on his goals), then women have no power over him.

I've thought about this lately: how lust is such a killer of us achieving our goals and growing in life. Instead of doing what matters, we chase some pu55y. That's so silly, really.
 

Pandora

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Women's most powerful weapon is their appearance, sex appeal and seduction/mind games.

If a man decides to not be impressed by any of that (for example when he is focused on his goals), then women have no power over him.

I've thought about this lately: how lust is such a killer of us achieving our goals and growing in life. Instead of doing what matters, we chase some pu55y. That's so silly, really.
Its so dang silly man. Spending half our lives chasing the orgasm.
 

Vanderdonck

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I actually think a lot of lust is just female validation issues. Is it really the orgasm you are chasing or the approval from an attractive woman? I think it is the latter.
Hard to say. Some guys have kind of an addiction. But I think validation is also a factor. Not just from women but from everyone. Some guys need the world to know they are a player (which can be a bad look).

I don't judge, to each his own, but I think with experience comes a more suave vibe that women pick up on. They can tell you're good with women and you don't need to prove it. Even a guy like me, I'm settled down and sexually satisfied, but I treat women in a way where they feel attractive and attracted, even if it's just on a superficial level. I have no need to prove I can bang a girl or demonstrate that I once read some pickup material or whatever. My game is internalized and my energy reflects it.
 

The Duke

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I actually think a lot of lust is just female validation issues. Is it really the orgasm you are chasing or the approval from an attractive woman? I think it is the latter.

The problem with lust is that it cant be quenched. The more you try to satisfy it the bigger it grows. If you try to ignore it then it eventually mutates into something weird and it eventually explodes. Maybe the answer is balance.
For me it was always about conquering a challenge and winning. I'm a hunter. I guess you could call it a need to self validate. It really doesn't matter if its women or something else(business, hobbies, hunting animals, etc) I want to go after.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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