"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Random person claiming to be a chick contacting me on yahoo chat

StevenR

Senior Don Juan
Joined
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This person claiming to be a chick started sending me random emails, at first I ignored them but then I responded to this one because I got a bit curious and had nothing better to do. It is totally odd "she" is acting like she was my girlfriend or something. Is this some sort of scam? Anyone had this happen to them before on a chat or instant messenger?

the first quote is her, then it goes back and forth between me and "her".

<ding> 2:50 PM

hello are u there 2:50 PM

am here 2:50 PM

hw was yr day 2:50 PM

talk to me 2:50 PM

hello hun 2:56 PM

babe i miss u 3:53 PM

hello babe are u thre 3:53 PM

talk to me
who the hell are you? 3:54 PM
are u preteding or what? 3:55 PM

tell me babe 3:56 PM
This is silly. tell me who you are or I'll block you, I don't have time for silly games 3:57 PM
then who is thesilly player? 3:58 PM

babe are u out of ur senses
cos i dont nderstand u
you have a name, correct?
ae the not that farner 4:01 PM

i couldnt understand u 4:01 PM

who makes go mad 4:02 PM

tell me babe 4:02 PM

cos this unuall of u
are you from Nigeria, by chance? Did I inherit some sort of trust fund or something? 4:03 PM

is that what you are trying to tell me?

cos this un usual of u 4:04 PM

am an ameican
I don't know who you are, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt. If you think you are talking to your boyfriend, you have the wrong computer, the wrong IP address, you got a wrong number. I DON' 4:05 PM

I don't know who you are!
i was raisd and bor in schenectady ny 4:06 PM

ok 4:06 PM

but i felt so bad to hear that from somebody like u 4:07 PM

well its a pity 4:08 PM
who did you think you are writing to? I don't get it. 4:08 PM
pls tel me 4:09 PM

what happend to u todaybabe 4:09 PM

did one of ur animals die 4:09 PM

tell me 4:09 PM

ok 4:09 PM

i had u 4:10 PM

am not frcing myself on any body like u
lol you still haven't told me your name.
babe just tell what did u do for a living
I am the dude who invented sybians. Do you know what those are? 4:14 PM

look it up in google images
or u mean games 4:16 PM

oh..k 4:16 PM

If you wish to chat with me...am here busy am not forcing myself on you
I wish to know your name 4:18 PM

even if you want to know my name....you dont have to deny of knowing me
Is contacting random people on the internet a regular hobby of yours?
Dont you know the exact dating site you have your profile on it? 4:20 PM
I have had my profiles on dating sites, but I don't have a link to THIS address that I am aware of. Why hide who you are anyway?
I will like to let you who i am....Its caused me notting but i want you to it off your mind that am a stranger 4:23 PM

If i dont have link to your profile I will never contact you 4:23 PM

u there
thinking about it
Tell me your name
maybe later, I 'll have to think about it. how about you tell me your name first, or send s link to your profile 4:28 PM
Then its seem you dont want to chat with me... 4:29 PM

Are you a coward....C'mmon boy cheer up

A coward!? for all I know this could be some sort of elaborate phishing scam that I have never heard of. I am curious but I have to consult with some computer savvy friends first. My curiousity is not worth having my life screwed over by some shrewd scammer. I am sure you understand.
Boy....Am not a scammer...You dont have the kinda money i need for mylife 4:31 PM
but I invented sybians? Would I not be wealthy? 4:34 PM
I dont care about your money....But i want to get you
okay, but you have to admit the way you contacted me was a little odd, acting like you are already my gf or something. That is why I want to make sure you are not some guy typing away at a scam center in Lagos

Forget about the scam level....Am not a fool 4:38 PM

i cant fool you because i want to bring you up 4:38 PM

i want you to think like a man 4:40 PM

Get this off your head...Am a smart lady...A lady fo my name and full of alot of expreince how to treat kinda man like
I will like to ask you kinda questions now...and i will like y 4:43 PM

And i will like you to answer me true min 4:43 PM

Mind* 4:43 PM

Let me know when you are set for the questions 4:44 PM
I'll get back to you in a little bit
Are you scared...C'mmon You are a save....Never wil i hurt you.... 4:45 PM
you can ask whatever you want. I have a question for you.. have we had sex before? 4:54 PM
Yoo there 4:54 PM

Get back to me when yoo free...Or when you feel like knowing the kinda lady i am...Let me know when you are ready to know my names and where i live ok... 4:54 PM

<ding> 4:54 PM

Are you hidding anythung from me? 4:55 PM

I know you as a real person...I dnt meant to hurt you but i wan you to be honest with me then you are save
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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StevenR

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
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okay this is serious, can someone figure out where you physically live with just your ip address, by chatting with you online? I think it is some sort of bizarre prank I fell for, but she claims she knows me (but won't tell me who she is) and she made a bizarre threat if I cut contact.
 

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Yeah someone can infact do that.

IM chat safety protocols are a joke.

You probably don't have to be too worried though.

It could be a buddy messing with you or a person thousands of miles away which would make it impractical for them to come after you anyway.

Even if it is some weirdo that you don't know who lives in your area why waste time talking when they can get to you right away? So my take is even if it is someone you don't know from your area their joy comes from messing with your head moreso than outright attacking you.

Just block the person and completely ignore their im's if they get through the block and they should eventually leave you alone.

If that doesn't work you'll have to change your IM name.
 

StevenR

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
301
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So my take is even if it is someone you don't know from your area their joy comes from messing with your head moreso than outright attacking you.
yeah, you are probably right, I was wondering why "she" was talking to me at all. Then she claimed to be someone who personally knows me and in the course of our writing said this after claiming to know me and know "she" knew where I live-

We need to talk 5:42 PM

But returning the videos can wait till later.. 5:42 PM

Why cant you return the videos later..Just give me some little time to ask some personal questons from you before we close the chat
Me-
gotta go now
her, the bizarre threat she made after letting me know where I lived-

Try to think very well...and let me warn you 5:48 PM

Look very well before you sleep 5:49 PM

And tbe carefull of what you eat and where you go NOW
You not answering me 5:55 PM

Dontbe scared...its a threat but i mean everything a 5:55 PM

about my WORDs
 

Huffman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
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You CAN find out from the IP, but only if you use a static address, which most people don't have.

If your ip belongs to your college, it's easy to find out. However, if you're some random dial-up/cable/whatever user, it is near impossible.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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