Raising Women as Equals

[Drum&Bass]

I was watching a show about an all girls soccer team and observed the behavior of the way women treated each other and their out look on life.

...and it hit me that women who are able to reject societies influence of what is important in life (marriage and babies) and pursue what makes them happy are the women that have the fewest social problems and seem to enjoy a much more enriched and fulfilling life.

I'm sure a majority of these women will at some point want a family but what sets them apart from most women is their individual interests not related to what someone can do for them but what they can do for themselves.

imagine girls were taught to work hard for things they wanted in life. They learned about disappointment, failure and struggle in their early years, basically having the same pressures and expectations as a man.

I think the key to having a balanced happy society in this day and age is to socially condition both genders to pursue individual goals outside and unrelated to a famliy structure instead of women being taught to find a good provider and men being taught to become good providers. (redifining feminity and masculinity)

 

[lookyoung]

Your wrong woman who are past the age of 30 and don't have a husband or kids are some of the most miserable people on earth.

Feminization has made woman more miserable. Woman of the 50's were much happier than the woman of today.

Family structure is very important to a woman. You will never see a woman that is 40-single-happy, unless she is a lesbian or has a mental disorder.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Some wisdom in the words of the young brother above. True, women over 30 who have noone to cling to are some of the most bitter b!tches you'll ever encounter. Pissed off that thier clocks are ticking and noone to clutter up thier butter gutters.

 

[jophil28]

LOOKYOUNG wrote , " .... unless she is a lesbian or she has mental disorder .'" Where is the line of distinction ?

 

[KarmaSutra]

LOOKYOUNG wrote , " .... unless she is a lesbian or she has mental disorder .'" Where is the line of distinction ?

You're an idiot.

 

[insidious]

Your wrong woman who are past the age of 30 and don't have a husband or kids are some of the most miserable people on earth.

Feminization has made woman more miserable. Woman of the 50's were much happier than the woman of today.

Family structure is very important to a woman. You will never see a woman that is 40-single-happy, unless she is a lesbian or has a mental disorder.

Dude, generalizations are the last refuge of the intellectually lazy.

I hear guys like you on a mission of torching female bitterness yet you aren't
far behind on the male side.

I'll tell ya who are some of the most miserable people I've run into in my life:
50-something married men who seek refuge and companionship in bars with other like-minded guys while they drink their remaining years away. And I speak from experience on that. And these were financially successful men.

If we're gonna categorize, let's start the list now.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Dude, generalizations are the last refuge of the intellectually lazy.

generalization

n 1: the process of formulating general concepts by abstracting common properties of instances [syn: abstraction, generalisation] 2: reasoning from detailed facts to general principles [syn: generalisation, induction, inductive reasoning] 3: an idea having general application; "he spoke in broad generalities" [syn: generalisation, generality] 4: (psychology) transfer of a response learned to one stimulus to a similar stimulus [syn: generalisation, stimulus generalization, stimulus generalisation]

Source: WordNet ® 2.0, © 2003 Princeton University


Generalization gets a bum rap. It ougt to be used in the way it was actually intended - drawing hypothesis and conclusions from a greater, general whole of observed behavior. Pay close attention to #2, "reasoning from detailed facts to general principles [syn: generalisation, induction, inductive reasoning]." I am sorry if this process offends you, but I'm interested in the general Rule, since it,_ and not the exceptions to it, help predict an outcome.

I am half my father and half my mother, my daughter is half my wife and half me. A child derives it's understanding of gender from the influences, or lack thereof, from the conditions both parents model AND modify for them. The basic logic is that my daughter will develop her understanding of the masculine from me and the feminine from my wife. If my attitude towards my wife's femininity is negative, I then modify this for her to the negative. If my wife devalues the merits of my masculinity, she then modifies my daughter's perception of masculinity.

The masculine has a natural propensity towards risk taking, while the feminine stresses security and safety; both are necessary elements in a person's emotional, intellectual and social maturity. When one characteristic is lacking the other will tend to be dominant. A child depends on it's parents to have a mature understanding of these functions of gender and when one is deficient or absent altogether it retards the overal maturity of the individual. Ergo, when Mommy consistently goes on about what an Ass-Hole Daddy was or how indecisive and spineless he is, the child then internalizes that masculine characteristics are negative and to be curbed. In the reverse if Daddy badmouths or abuses Mommy he likewise prompts a negative characterization of feminine traits.

Children do not think in abstract terms, they think in binaries - it's either on or it's off. They have not yet developed the mental tools to form objective understandings and are thus powerless to defend themselves from gender interpretations and biases set for them by their parent's examples. This is not to say that we are slaves to this initial programing, but on some level of consciousness it will affect our interpretations of gender characteristics for the rest of our lives.

I would argue that a great majority of AFCs and LSE women in the world suffer from this as a root cause of their interpretations of gender. AFCs raised by a single mother who herself was raised by a single mother will have no regard for any positive aspect of masculinity, likewise for girls, if the male element is absent or devalued. The same holds true for women lacking the self-esteem to act in their own best interests as a result of having that masculine influence removed.

This is not to undervalue the feminine either. Both sexes need this influence to develop empathy and accurately judge risk assessments to better deal with others as well as have a drive to succeed in what it is they want for thmeselves. Lets not forget there are also men who become abusers after having a lack of positive modeling of the feminine.

After 3 or 4 generations of this denigration of both genders, many individuals suffer from a retarded understanding of the qualities of gender. A single mother who becomes the grand mother of a woman who herself becomes a single mother is the result of a continued decay in appreciating the masculine. AFC fathers who spend a lifetime supplicating to their wives, whether in marriage or divorce, inadvertently teach their children (both male and female) that it is a masculine trait to do so because he has never learned otherwise and thus models his behavior for them without knowing this.

 

[insidious]

RoTo, I agree with you, but...

I will stand by my original assertion.
Perhap I should peel that onion away further:
Dude, generalizations are the weapon of the intellectually lazy.

a)Women are better off not accepting traditional gender roles;
b)Women are better off accepting traditional gender roles.

Argue it, debate it, make your case.. Simply to resort to some
rehashed Sosuave observation does nothing to strengthen your viewpoint.

In essence, I agree with 'lookyoung'...the OP made an observation which will obviously find no favor on this board.

I'm finding fault with the method of argument rather than the argument. Such sweeping generalities will obviously find a home on this forum, but they sound idiotic out in a culture which would benefit more by being slapped in the face with the cold hard fact. Slogans like "all single women in their 30's are miserable *****es" do not carry any weight.

To use my example from my bartending days:
I'll tell ya who are some of the most miserable people I've run into in my life:
50-something married men who seek refuge and companionship in bars with other like-minded guys while they drink their remaining years away. And I speak from experience on that. And these were financially successful men.

I could throw this generalization out on some MADD-related forum (if there is such a thing) to refute someone's point that middle-aged men don't abuse alcohol. It's a generalization that in itself would discredit the argument, but is a generalization based on a limited view of reality based on my own experiences.

Essentially, the generalization becomes the argument, and how can you counter a generalization?

 

[##17]

I was watching a show about an all girls soccer team and observed the behavior of the way women treated each other and their out look on life.

...and it hit me that women who are able to reject societies influence of what is important in life (marriage and babies) and pursue what makes them happy are the women that have the fewest social problems and seem to enjoy a much more enriched and fulfilling life.

I'm sure a majority of these women will at some point want a family but what sets them apart from most women is their individual interests not related to what someone can do for them but what they can do for themselves.

imagine girls were taught to work hard for things they wanted in life. They learned about disappointment, failure and struggle in their early years, basically having the same pressures and expectations as a man.

I think the key to having a balanced happy society in this day and age is to socially condition both genders to pursue individual goals outside and unrelated to a famliy structure instead of women being taught to find a good provider and men being taught to become good providers. (redifining feminity and masculinity)

My last girlfriend played soccer in high school, she has the curvy, muscular figure. MMMMMM....I love athletic girls.

Anyway, getting to your thread, I see your point, but women always will be women. They might be able to take care of themselves psycially, but they'll always look to men to lead them.

 

[Drum&Bass]

They might be able to take care of themselves psycially, but they'll always look to men to lead them.

I can understand that in order for progress/failure to be made there has to be a dominant character to assume control and responsibility (preferably a male).

So how can interaction between men and women improve ? How can society go about creating a nation of intelligent, compassionate, objective thinkers or at least abandon shallow, trivial, insignificant behavior and trends.

 

[Last Man Standing]

No One TEACHES men to be men or women to be women -- we are as we are created -- to say otherwise is part of the Homo/Hor agenda!!!

 

[Hitman10000]

So true and sad. Marriage is not what's it cracked up to be, if you're gonna hook up for life. Hook up with someone you find attractive and has an awesome personality.

Dude, generalizations are the last refuge of the intellectually lazy.

I'll tell ya who are some of the most miserable people I've run into in my life:
50-something married men who seek refuge and companionship in bars with other like-minded guys while they drink their remaining years away. And I speak from experience on that. And these were financially successful men.

If we're gonna categorize, let's start the list now.