Raising faltering IL

[pikachu69]

If I need to rebuild attraction which is fading and her IL is fading, how do I do this if see her out and about on campus?

Asking her out just gets me flakey non-committal answers. Is really showing disdain and ignoring her going to prop up her low IL?

I feel like ignoring her is going to take a long time to work, is she really going to notice I'm not pursuing her or trying to arrange a time to meet up with her anymore when I've been so resolute in chasing her for a date everytime i see her?

 

[theMusician]

If I need to rebuild attraction which is fading and her IL is fading, how do I do this if I see her out and about on campus?

Why do you need to rebuild attraction? Have you considered adopting a non-caring attitude and letting her see your less needy side? Why are you concerned with rebuilding her interest in you?

Asking her out just gets me flakey non-committal answers. Is really showing disdain and ignoring her going to prop up her low IL?

Ignoring her is ignoring her. Why not assume her flakey non-committal answers and plan around them? Why not plan before hand that she will give you these attitudes and go about setting up a "game plan" to overcome these obstacles? Or any derivation that works for you.

Maybe if you set your goal (getting a date with this girl),
then plan every step you need to take to attain it (attracting her, demonstrate high value, show your manliness and and decisiveness)
then if you plan all the possible obstacles you can think of (she outright says no, she is busy, she cant give you a decisive answer, etc)
and then you plan to overcome those obstacles (laugh it off and continue conversation to try again - keep things mildly sexual (tension), tell her no problem and dont try to plan a future date - instead try to just meet up with her again in a completely casual place to try again, or if she cant decide then maybe she is waiting for a man to lead her, if you dont then who will?). If you do this you'll probably succeed; spend a few hours on it, but remain detached from the outcome. if she fails as a date then she isnt worth it and you can fish from the rest of the sea.

I feel like ignoring her is going to take a long time to work, is she really going to notice I'm not pursuing her or trying to arrange a time to meet up with her anymore when I've been so resolute in chasing her for a date everytime i see her?

If you aren't excited about engaging in that behavior then dont do it and instead adopt an attitude and countenance of fun, pleasure, sexual excitement and manliness that she responds to, versus a obliging task of having to ignore her. If you enjoy being around her, show her, if you want to date her, do it, dont ask, lead her, take her on an instant date for coffee at starbucks or something similar and engage in a stimulating conversation. Be energetic and passionate. There is little need to worry about what you need to do if its stressing you out. Instead focus on enjoying yourself or dating her could seem seem like a chore instead or the fun that I am assuming you want to enjoy?

Thats my shpeel brother.

 

[Ease]

Patterns and predictability is a killer for IL. Everything goes nice and your beginning to like this girl. Without noticing you slip into patterns. You ask her out after every X days for 2 days later. You always phone her at X time. Etc etc, this makes her way too comfortable. You initiate interaction too often.

This is sometimes hard to spot, it can creep up on you and suddenly you find she's losing IL and taking longer to reply and seems flakier and less enthusiastic. Its sneaky.

Dont initiate till she initiates. I always need to find out when she's free before i can make a date, due to work/plans. Find out when she's free, but dont ask her out. End the convo and leave her hanging next time you talk.

Never leave messages/texts regarding plans. Phone her, if she doesnt pickup, hang up. Wait for her to phone back. Always, this is gold.

The number 1 way to rekindle interest is to pull back. Act aloof and uninterested. Cancel a date, rescheduel a date. Be late, leave early.

If you're early in dating stage with her, ie. first few dates, then you could wait till you see her face to face, if possible. Face to face she loses her flaky advantage, you arent stuck waiting for replies.

Never accept rescheduels or counter offers, with exceptions.

Sometimes a girl really isnt interested. 90% of the time she's playing the game. A girl playing the game with you is a girl with SOME interest level in you. Not enough, but enough to keep the relationship going.

You need to hook her in. When she's hooked in and invested, then you can pull back and let her chase you for dates. Untill then you need to keep it tight. Remember to stop chasing if you feel there is no game at hand.

 

[nismo-4]

First off, stop chasing. Stop catching feelings. Don't deny it, you are because you ended up getting into an attack pattern which is totally predictable, ooh listen to that word again!

PREDICTABLE!

That is the equivalent of BORING!!!

Now that you knocked down her IL, you may be in the friendzone. And you keep asking her out? Oh hell no! That is a major attraction killer bro.

Make this girl chase you! It's super effective! How do you do it? Ok, you need to make yourself the prize and make it look as if you'll leave at the drop of a hat with no letup! You work on that.

Case closed. Post some results.

 

[pikachu69]

Never accept rescheduels or counter offers, with exceptions.

.

whoa i made this thread so long ago i forgot what i was thinking at the time but thanks for the advice anyway.

i thought about what you said above here.. when i set up this date with this HB for the next day evening she texts me 10mins later to make it friday or thursday.

if you don't accept reschedules or counter offers then what do you say when she offers u a different time?