"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Quotes about women

trippychip

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Im not sure this has been done before but hey its worth a shot.

So guys what are some of your favourite true quotes about women. Funny or not, lets hear him boys.

"treat her like a dog and she'll beg for a treat. Treat her like a queen and she'll treat you like a servant."

"if you really truely care for her, buy her a treadmill."
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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Reed247

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You know

Your mamas so fat she sat on a rainbow and made skittles
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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NOT DIRECTED AT ANYONE!!!!

Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!
 

wind20mph

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hahahahahaha

Funny indeed.

That qout just gives you a sign of insecurities
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Mortukai

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No men who really think deeply about women retain a high opinion of them; men either despise women or they have never thought seriously about them. -- Otto Weininger

The same instinct that has allowed men to dominate our society for all of recorded history allows for selectivity in communication. Men know what information is important to convey and what is just a waste of time. Instead of talking on the phone about nothing, men are out running governments and exploring outer space. -- Corey McFadden

Masks.-- There are women who, however you may search them, prove to have no content but are purely masks. The man who associates with such almost spectral, necessarily unsatisfied beings is to be commiserated with, yet it is precisely they who are able to arouse the desire of the man most strongly: he seeks for her soul -- and goes on seeking. --Nietzsche

What passes for women's intuition is often nothing more than man's transparency.

If women said what they thought they'd be speechless.

Womens' intuition is the result of millions of years of not thinking.

If God considered woman a fit helpmate for man, he must have had a very poor opinion of man.

God created man, and finding him not sufficiently alone, gave him a companion to make him feel his solitude more acutely.

***

Them's are a few of my all-time favs.
 
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