Questions concerning LTR...

[Colossus]

Alright, I'll try keep this brief. But first, a little background info....

Ive been dating this girl for about 2 and a half months. For all intensive purposes it's a fairly commited relationship-(i.e.-- No cheating, calls me everyday, regular sex, see her 5-6 days a wek, etc.)
My problem is that we only see each other during the week; on the weekends she usually goes home (we're in college) or hangs out with her friends.

I dont mind her seeing friends or going home for a day or two. Whatever. But, alot of her friends are guys; some (if not all) of whom are quite fond of her---they want to bang her. I have no evidence up to this point to suggest she may be prone to infidelity, but, as I tend to get jealous at times, I have my suspicions. She is fairly quiet, especially for a girl, and I have a hard time discerning how she really feels about me.
So, I dont want to be a b!tch and ask her about it, but sometimes I wonder how important I am to her.

In short, I have feelings for this girl, and I dont want to put my heart into it unless I know she feels the same way. I am relatively inexperienced with LTRs, while she has had several 1-3 year relationships.

Any quality advice would be helpful.

 

[flexion_]

You are doomed to failure if you are seeing her 5-6 times a week and want to see her more on weekends.

It seems like you are smothering her. Back off seeing her so much through the week and then you can justify seeing her on weekends - so get busy with other parts of your life.

 

[chuchu]

College not a good time to worry about girls. Worry will lead to depression and can easily affect your grades. But it can be lonely sometimes, especially on the weekend sitting at your dorm alone.

But in a relationship you should aways ask yourself, do you challenged her enough? Calling everyday might be not a good idea.
Regular sex, who controls who? If she controls you then she might have the upper hands, eventually her interest level will fall. So it's not wise to let your little brother do the thinking. Be the master of your domain.

What ever you do, dont change yourself. Be confident, I know many guys became wussus after dating a few months.

And have a plan for your life. Have a goal. Work out, eat right. Feel good about yourself. Meet other girls, be proactive in your relations with other girls. And most importantly always have a backup plans, be prepare to walk away knowing that you have someone else waiting for you.

 

[WestCoaster]

Colussus, good post and I can relate. I had a very similar relationship in college, wish the gal all the time (I was a royal AFC), she, too, had a lot of guy friends ... and we broke up one time over a guy she had a fling with over the summer. Me in my AFC state, went back to her. I was the poster child for being a man p-ssy ... God, wish I had a time machine to alter that part of my past.

But I digress ... don't be jealous, it's a waste of time. College really is a time to play the field. Some women are looking for husbands, but a lot are just finding themselves as personally, intellectually, emotionally, and yes, sexually. It may be time for you to play the field, too. I'm not saying dump her, but I'm not against it either.

I do know that you're spending too much time with her ... regular sex or not. I know, I've been there, I've smothered women. Step back and become more of a mystery to her. Make yourself the prize, your post reads like she's the prize.

My advice would be to play the field, but if you want to keep her as your GF, I'd step back a bit and spend more time with other people ... get some guy friends as well as gal friends.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Originally posted by chuchu
College not a good time to worry about girls. Worry will lead to depression and can easily affect your grades.

This should be cannonized. Fathers, if you teach your son's one thing, teach them this.

COLOSUS: If you are younger than 25 you shouldn't even consider monogamy, particularly in college. Most guys take this advice the wrong way and think I'm advocating fvcking anything that moves, I'm not, but you need more irons in the fire son. You're only concerned about this girl's weekend activities because you don't have any better opportunities of your own. If you had more prospects to pursue you would even make a post like this. On top of that your manifesting symptoms of ONEitis - a common disease for men your age unfortunately - by presuming that you 'should' be together 24/7. I can't think of a better recipe for personal / relationship disaster.

 

[ER!C L!VE]

If I get serious about a girl, I get concerned if she's hanging out with other guys. Even if the other guy is gay. ( I don't think much of girls who hang out with gay guys anyway - fag hags).

I'm an asshole when it comes to my girl and other guys. It's either them or me. VERY FEW EXCEPTIONS. I was flexible in my younger days, until I found out that after we broke up, the girl would end up dating one of the guys she was hanging out with on the side. I live my life through my experiences. I understand that my outlook will end many relationships before they can fully blossom, but at least I'll be happy. Always make sure that you're happy in the relationship.

God, I'm a dick.

 

[Bible_Belt]

she has had several 1-3 year relationships

How did they end? Do you see any patterns? Are there a trail of broken AFC hearts in her past?