"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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questions about eye contact

foreverAFC

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lets say you see a decent looking lady walking down a long hallway toward you. whats the proper way to maintain eye contact here? do you stare at her the entire time till she passes and maintain the eye contact the entire time? or do you wait till she is a bit closer? do you say hi from far away?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Uncharted

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What's the scenario here? Is this a girl you go to school with, work with, complete stranger? If it's someone you don't know at all, here's what I do:

I notice her. I grab my phone and keep walking toward her, but looking down at the phone and waiting until she is close (you'll start to see her in your peripheral). Then look up, smile. She is usually close enough at this point that she will smile back.

MOST IMPORTANTLY. STOP AND SAY "Hi". She will stop.

Then run game. You already have your phone out so it's easier to get her number.

If she keeps walking she wasn't interested or she's a wacko.
 

Darth

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I would do exactly what you feel like. If you want to look at her, then do it. If you are interested, then show it in an obvious way and make eye contact as quickly as possible so that you can say "Hi" as quickly as possible so you can start hitting on her as quickly as possible. No secrets, everything out in the open.
 

JohnChops

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Studies have been done to show that eye contact increases he secretion of a hormone, Oxytocin. Oxytocin is also referred to the "Love Hormone". Its receptors are antagonized via feeling comfortable / connected with someone. It is the body's natural sign of attraction and love.

So in other words, the longer you hold eye contact the more comfortable she will feel towards you. Just don't stare her down .
 

HalfPUAHalfAFC

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bradd80 said:
Look over to her, and hold eye contact for about two seconds. If she catches you looking, just hold her gaze for two seconds, smile, and say hi as she gets close to you. Don't say hi to her if she's too far away. If she's too far for you to say hi, then just hold eye contact with her for the same two seconds, then look away. Or even better, look down slowly, seductively. This is very flirtatious.

Either way, she KNOWS you’re interested, and you want her to know without you having to approach her and say, "I like you" (girls appreciate subtlety).

Be careful with the length of time: too short and she’ll think you’re afraid of her, too long and she might think that you think there’s something wrong with her. Or even worse, she might think there's something wrong with you.
Braddo, I'm older than you and don't pull as many hotchicks as you (I've seen your posts), but I've got to give you props. You have this stuff down pretty damn good and teach me plenty of stuff.

Guys, if you haven't read his sticky, you should. Plenty to learn there and try to remember. Okay, maybe's he not at "Pook" or "Anti-Dump" level/philosophy, etc., but he gives clear examples and cases of his field testing.

Excellent poster and someone to listen to, not only for less experienced guys but also some of us older dudes (who even have some success over the years) can learn from him.

Respect
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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foreverAFC

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bradd80 said:
Be careful with the length of time: too short and she’ll think you’re afraid of her, too long and she might think that you think there’s something wrong with her. Or even worse, she might think there's something wrong with you.

its hard for me to find the proper balance and timing. one thing i did notice was that the times when i held eye contact the entire time, like pretty much stared at her, they noticed the most and would give me back eye contact when i would see them later. too little eye contact or looking away too soon always makes them ignore afterwards. too much seems to be better than too little.

it just sucks that little meaningless things like this can make such a huge difference in how a female reacts/acts to you.

btw, the context is the workplace. im a low level IT worker at a huge internet company, there are attractive women everywhere. a lot of times i open the door to a hallway and see an attractive woman at the very end of it walking toward me.
 

Darth

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Just don't overthink it. Eye contact is as natural as breathing- I don't need a watch to determine proper eye contact. But maybe I am missing something.

PS Who cares what she thinks. You haven't said a word yet- if she judges you for doing eye contact "wrong" before you even open your mouth either she is a wacko or you are not being yourself. One or the other.
 

pdx1138

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Though I do have occasional bouts with low self-esteem, I've never, ever had problems initiating and maintaining good eye contact with a female I'm interested in.

I've also stared down a cop when he pulled me over and gave me the eagle eye lol.

For women, I gaze into the left eye, not the eyebrow. There is something more hypnotic and sensual about it that I read somewhere once. works for me.
 

Darth

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^^I spoke with a cop a few weeks ago. Strolled over to the car and I rolled my window down. Scared the guy. He was holding a flashlight and his hand was shaking.

No reason to be afraid of cops. They're people, just like us.
 

Chamber36

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I have devised a formula so you have the perfect eye-contact ratio.

The further they are from you, the longer you want to look, obviously. If you are better looking you may also permit yourself to look longer. So multiply the square route of the distance in meters from you to the girl with one tenh your grade on a scale of 1-10. In other words: (√D)*(0.1G) = T

D means distance, G is what you grade yourself on a scale of 1-10, and T is the time you have to make eye-contact. So if she's 5 meters, and you are a 7, look at her (√5)*(0.1*7) = 1.56524 seconds.

As you can see, with each encounter you only have limited time, so make sure to time your looks well. You can also do them in intervals of 0.5 seconds or less, if you like. I would personally invest 0.5 early on from a distance, to let her know you've seen her, then look the rest of the time when she is within 1 meter.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Deep Dish

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JohnChops said:
Studies have been done to show that eye contact increases he secretion of a hormone, Oxytocin. Oxytocin is also referred to the "Love Hormone". Its receptors are antagonized via feeling comfortable / connected with someone. It is the body's natural sign of attraction and love.

So in other words, the longer you hold eye contact the more comfortable she will feel towards you. Just don't stare her down .
Prolonged eye contact also releases phenylethylamine, which is similar to speed. It’s the sex drug.
 
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