"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Question

SkillzthatKillz

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First let me start off by saying this site helped me a lot, 9 months ago, I wouldn’t have been able to do what I do now. For those who think it’s impossible to break out of your shell, it’s not trust me, just work hard. Am I a master DJ, NO! But im a lot better now. This site rocks. I’m still sort of new to the game so here is my question.

I got this girls number awhile back. We dated for awhile, had a lot of fun, and then just stopped calling each other. I took the advice of this site and dated other women, and I also had school. It’s been about 8 to 9 months since we talked, and I came by her number the other day, should I call her?? By the way, this girl has my number to, and hasn’t bothered to call me. It seems like some never call, and others call to much, LOL.

It's not a big deal and It’s not like im hard up for women at the moment, but after all this time, and knowing she could have called me, should I even bother?

So let me ask it this way, whats the rule? Should you call flakey chicks. Or always look ahead.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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DarkChaos

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You are the pursuer. If you wait for women to call you then you're going to be waiting for a long time. Women are passive; men are aggressive. You are the initiator.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

Master Don Juan
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9 months is an awfully long time. Any rapport you two might have had is gone because you've both "moved on".

Why on earth would you want to just "cold call" her, out of the blue? What do you expect to get from doing this? If you're just calling to say hello and play a quick game of "catch up" then by all means, go for it... just don't expect to jump back into her life. Chances are she's seeing someone else, anyways.

and you say it's no big deal? If it's no big deal, you'd throw away the number and find a new girl.

This is kinda strange
 

tmpgstx

Master Don Juan
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That's some good advice from BAC ..nothing to add.

You are the pursuer. If you wait for women to call you then you're going to be waiting for a long time. Women are passive; men are aggressive. You are the initiator.

I think many guys have one HELL of a problem with this one. It most likely will depend on the context of the situation.

It's basically a mating dance, and if you're doing all the dancing (pursuing) then you'll be dancing alone.

I agree with calling her first but you want a 'trump card'. Too many girls have too many options (especially the nice looking girls) so you want to land that first date on preferrably the first call. Show her what you have to offer early on a date, not by repeated unecessary phone calls.
 
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