Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Question to the women here: Do women prefer being approached direct or indirect?

Guitar_Whizz

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I see endless debates in the seduction community about direct game vs indirect game. I've personally had success with both, though mostly with indirect to be honest.

So I'm asking this question to the females on this board....from an honest female perspective, do you think women in general prefer being approached directly or indirectly?

By direct, I mean when you open with something like 'Excuse me, I think you're cute and I want to meet you'. By indirect I mean where you make an excuse to talk to her, such as asking her opinion, or whatever.

I have been very, very successful with indirect cold approaches, especially during the daytime.

But the direct vs indirect date rages on and I want some more perspective on this.

Thanks
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Mad Manic

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Indirect works better. Virtually all the LRs are from indirect. Subtlety rules IMO.

MM
 

DonJoseCantosie

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^ MM, you are an idiot.
Topic Creator, they both can work. Its just most guys prefer indirect because its easier. Direct is harder and can take longer to master, but is more rewarding.
 

ChrizZ

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DonJoseCantosie said:
^ MM, you are an idiot.
Topic Creator, they both can work. Its just most guys prefer indirect because its easier. Direct is harder and can take longer to master, but is more rewarding.
couldn't have said it any better.

It doesn't really matter though.

It's all about subcommunication anyways.
 

ArtVandelay

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You're all idiots. The answer is: women don't like to be cold approached, period. They already have enough guys in their life (friends, friends of friends, co-workers) to choose from, why would she choose some creepy stranger off the street who throws some corny "who lies more, men or women" lines at her?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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iqqi

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HOWEVER

Since this thread is beneficial to all wondering. If a woman is interested in you, then you can approach her directly. If she finds you attractive, you can approach her directly.

However, you find this out... indirectly.

Through eye contact and body language.

Unless you are a super c0cky mofo, in which case you could move in on an ice queen and either get her interest, or amuse yourself.

Til then, master the art of eye contact, subtle smiling, and body language. Learn how to seduce with your eyes.
 

ArtVandelay

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Iqqi, don't listen to GuitarWhizz, the only action he gets is with this right hand. He's probably upset that some girl dumped him once his pimple cream stopped working. He sounds like he's 17, not 27.
 

Guitar_Whizz

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ArtVandelay said:
You're all idiots. The answer is: women don't like to be cold approached, period. They already have enough guys in their life (friends, friends of friends, co-workers) to choose from, why would she choose some creepy stranger off the street who throws some corny "who lies more, men or women" lines at her?
You post this, and then you tell people not to listen to ME?????

WTF man????

This is what has happened to SoSuave.com. The majority of people here have a negative, closed minded attitude towards things they've not even bothered to try out.

Women don't like to be cold approached, period???? What??? What are you basing this opinion on? Have you been out and done thousands of cold approaches, and then concluded that women don't like to be cold approached? Or are you basing this on your own negativety and closed minded attitude?

Cos unless you've field tested cold approaches and know for sure, how the HELL can you post this?

Let me tell you something, sunny Jim. I know for a FACT that women LOVE being cold approached, as over the past 6 years I have done thousands upon thousands of approaches, and I now have a skillset that enables me to meet women anytime, anyplace and usually be successful.

Now as for YOU....unless you change your terrible, condescending attutude, you will forever be doomed to playing with your hand and posting flames at people like me, because you are bitter you can't do cold approaches and can't get laid.
 

ArtVandelay

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I've done approaches, and if you have, I'm sure the words "get lost, freak" "look at you, then look at me" "I have a boyfriend" "I'm a lesbian" "Hey (insert friend's name here), this guy walked up to me and just tried to talk to me!" and getting pepper-sprayed or threatened to call security/police sound familiar to you. You can lie about having a good success rate online, but let's hear audio of the approaches, or see pictures of the girls you approached. Unless you're Tom Brady with Richard Gere charm, or you're approaching UG0-4s, you haven't got a HB girlfriend from a cold approach and you know it.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Guitar_Whizz

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ArtVandelay said:
I've done approaches, and if you have, I'm sure the words "get lost, freak" "look at you, then look at me" "I have a boyfriend" "I'm a lesbian" "Hey (insert friend's name here), this guy walked up to me and just tried to talk to me!" and getting pepper-sprayed or threatened to call security/police sound familiar to you. You can lie about having a good success rate online, but let's hear audio of the approaches, or see pictures of the girls you approached. Unless you're Tom Brady with Richard Gere charm, or you're approaching UG0-4s, you haven't got a HB girlfriend from a cold approach and you know it.
Dude, if you're getting such negative responses from women, then it's something about YOU that needs to change. You're projecting a creepy, low status male vibe to them, and thus, they respond negatively to you.

Whereas if you were to work in projecting a confident, friendly, masculine, high value vibe, you'd almost always get good responses from women.

I don't need to post pictures of fbs, gfs, etc online.....I feel sorry for you that you are so disillusioned at your lack of success with cold approaching that you have to dis people like me who are being successful.

What sort of approaches are you doing? What is going through your head before you approach a good looking girl? What do you open with? If you can tell me these things, I can get an insight into why you might be getting such negative reactions from girls.
 

ArtVandelay

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Let me ask you a direct question, how many HB8+ girlfriends have you got from street approaches (I'm not talking about ONS at bars or clubs and the like, I'm talking long-term relationships, lasted at least a month)?
 

Jitterbug

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I'll second what Guitar_Whizz said, because I've done the same. I've made a lot of female friends, dates, FBs through cold approaches. I only had negative responses when I was new to this and wasn't good at it.

However, that isn't the topic.

Guitar_Whizz, I don't think you can really get reliable information out of women about what they truly prefer. They can't tell you what they want. It's our job to figure it out.

Most of my approaches are: indirect approach followed by direct interest statement. I've done some direct from the get-go recently and although it's been received well, I haven't got any solid result yet (still playing some fun game with the targets). YMMV, obviously.

You'll find your answer in the field, not here (with so few women, and the types who hang out on a DJ forum aren't representative of the rest).
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Jitterbug

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ArtVandelay said:
Let me ask you a direct question, how many HB8+ girlfriends have you got from street approaches (I'm not talking about ONS at bars or clubs and the like, I'm talking long-term relationships, lasted at least a month)?
I personally haven't got a LTR with an 8+ from a cold approach, but I've heard of plenty of stories. Sure, it's rare enough that most people don't do it, but a DJ isn't an ordinary male. "To boldly go where no man has gone before" is what DJs do.

If it doesn't work for you, fine, everyone has their preference. Keep your negativity to yourself.
 

Guitar_Whizz

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ArtVandelay said:
Let me ask you a direct question, how many HB8+ girlfriends have you got from street approaches (I'm not talking about ONS at bars or clubs and the like, I'm talking long-term relationships, lasted at least a month)?
Why does that matter? I'm not actually looking for LTRs anyway, so the answer is irrelevant. My goal is instant dates, kisses, sex, FBs, and casual open relationships, many of which I've formed from daytime cold approaches.

I can't answer with regards to LTRs, as I'm not looking for LTRs.

Most of my FBs have lasted several months and could have developed into LTRs if I'd wanted them to, but I chose not to as an LTR is not what I want at this time in my life.

Anyway, this post isn't about my success ratio. So can we please get back to the original question....women: do you prefer being approached indirectly or directly?
 

ArtVandelay

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You have this "I just want to get laid" attitude, but you sound like a 17 year old. Have you ever connected with a woman other than at a brothel?
 

Magma

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ArtVandelay said:
Let me ask you a direct question, how many HB8+ girlfriends have you got from street approaches (I'm not talking about ONS at bars or clubs and the like, I'm talking long-term relationships, lasted at least a month)?
There are guys here that don't give a fvck about LTR's, and want to have multiple plates spinning. Conversely, there are guys here that are searching for a quality woman with which they can have an exclusive LTR. To each their own.

If you don't agree with the OP's propensity for cold approaches, then that is your perogative. However, if the cold approach is the vehicle through which the OP finds his desired end, then who are you to judge?

I'm seeing a lot of haters on here lately...
 

The Deacon

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ArtVandelay said:
I've done approaches, and if you have, I'm sure the words "get lost, freak" "look at you, then look at me" "I have a boyfriend" "I'm a lesbian" "Hey (insert friend's name here), this guy walked up to me and just tried to talk to me!" and getting pepper-sprayed or threatened to call security/police sound familiar to you. You can lie about having a good success rate online, but let's hear audio of the approaches, or see pictures of the girls you approached. Unless you're Tom Brady with Richard Gere charm, or you're approaching UG0-4s, you haven't got a HB girlfriend from a cold approach and you know it.
You sound so... negative. I wonder where this negativity is coming from. Have you ever handled a woman in your life? Cold approaches have low success rates, but it doesn't mean no one has EVER hooked up with an HB by cold approach.

I balance between direct and indirect. I like indirect better, cause when you work a room and it looks like you're having a good time, girls are much easier to open. Some girls will open you if you look like you have high social value. All women are receptive to is social status. (at least the HOT ones, anyway).
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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