"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Question for the older dons

JohnChops

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I'm 19, all this information has sunk into my subconscious and its changed me.forever in a good way. My question to the older dons: if you were in my shoes right now how would you go about progressing ? I'm not really talking about with anything school related , I'm doing great there, more like the women department and also fear is not a factor. Let me know, I don't want to waste my young years, I'm just a bit lost is all . To many hours in the books :p
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Harry Wilmington

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You want actual action steps? Depends on what you're trying to do - just bang 'em or get a girlfriend. Please let us know which you're trying to ultimately do, and we can proceed from there...
 

BMX

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Do not go the girlfriend route while in school. At least as an undergraduate.
 

backbreaker

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1. i know you said you don't care about the business/school route but this needs, to be your first, second, third and forth priority.

I mean, I'm lucky that I have always worked hard, but at that age, i couldn't see life past.. 24-25 years old. lol life is VERRRRRRRRRRRRY LONG. very. **** this last 10 years felt like an eternity. it's even worse when you make ****ty decisions and ****ty career because you didn't' apply yourself.

handle this first and foremost. a few girls flake out on you beucase you aren't fun enough fvck em. trust me. fvck em. 18-22 is the most important time of a man's life. if you take care of your business, the **** is really smooth sailing from then on out.; if you don't, you will be behind the 8 ball for the rest of your life. i can't possibly stress this enough.


2. don't take women too seriously, there is nothing wrong wtih dating but don't go into it thinking that every girl you meet is a LTR or wife or any of that ****. know that this **** is probably going to end and end soon beucase 1. she's a teenager basically and 2. you aren't ready for anything serious. go on dates, have fun, have sex, but don't get too committed at this age. i would say pretty much under any circumstances. not only are you not ready, you don't have enough field experience to successfully deal with a woman for the rest of your life, you dn't know what your real earning power is, just don't get too caught up right now

3. last but not least, do not make any decisions about the rest of your life, based on any woman you are dating, could be dating or have dated. and wrap up.

I'm 29 dude, women aren't going anywhere. **** not only are they not going anywhere i attract more 20-23 year olds now than i ever did when i was actually 20-23. but you got to handle your business.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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bluenorther

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You'll stop finding suitable girls after they reach age 28 or so. They'll all be domesticated by then, and they won't reappear on your screen until they're forty+, divorced with kids.
 

Down Low

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For your own physical and mental health, disregard the advice to play women for fools. Rather, you have about 10 years more to mature before you're ready to conquer and devour an 18-22-year-old woman. Use that time to improve yourself. Sure, get some real-life experience, and toughen up for when it will really count.
 

Mike32ct

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Career and health are always at the top.

But one very useful thing in the women department...

Have a niche hobby that you are passionate about that also can attract women. Playing an instrument, dance, martial arts, learning multiple languages, whatever interests you. These things take a long time to master. Starting early when you are young is always better. Get really good at it.

Don't be the nerdy guy who is ONLY good at school. Having one good niche skill is very helpful with the ladies and can help clear your head in between studying and working.
 

Cremasta

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Take a year off school, it'll be waiting for you when you come back.

Go travelling, do the backpacker thing. As many places as you can afford and outside your own country if you can.
Travel around Europe
Work in hotels in SE Asia
Teach English in Japan

Got a couple of friends who did this while I was slugging my guts out at University... not one of them regrets it.
 

bigneil

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0) Find something you are good at, pick a career and work hard every day.
1) Learn how to eat right and avoid toxins.
2) Do pull-ups, push-ups, chin-ups and biking to stay in shape.
3) Date lots of women to learn from experience.
4) Don't get married.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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JohnChops

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backbreaker said:
1. i know you said you don't care about the business/school route but this needs, to be your first, second, third and forth priority.

I mean, I'm lucky that I have always worked hard, but at that age, i couldn't see life past.. 24-25 years old. lol life is VERRRRRRRRRRRRY LONG. very. **** this last 10 years felt like an eternity. it's even worse when you make ****ty decisions and ****ty career because you didn't' apply yourself.

handle this first and foremost. a few girls flake out on you beucase you aren't fun enough fvck em. trust me. fvck em. 18-22 is the most important time of a man's life. if you take care of your business, the **** is really smooth sailing from then on out.; if you don't, you will be behind the 8 ball for the rest of your life. i can't possibly stress this enough.


2. don't take women too seriously, there is nothing wrong wtih dating but don't go into it thinking that every girl you meet is a LTR or wife or any of that ****. know that this **** is probably going to end and end soon beucase 1. she's a teenager basically and 2. you aren't ready for anything serious. go on dates, have fun, have sex, but don't get too committed at this age. i would say pretty much under any circumstances. not only are you not ready, you don't have enough field experience to successfully deal with a woman for the rest of your life, you dn't know what your real earning power is, just don't get too caught up right now

3. last but not least, do not make any decisions about the rest of your life, based on any woman you are dating, could be dating or have dated. and wrap up.

I'm 29 dude, women aren't going anywhere. **** not only are they not going anywhere i attract more 20-23 year olds now than i ever did when i was actually 20-23. but you got to handle your business.
Can you explain the bold backbreaker?

Agreed, health and school come first hence why I study an hour a day, accept nothing lower than an A- and strive to keep my body in top shape (with some cheat days :p ) .

Just recently Ive had this breaking out feeling, like I want to do stuff I wouldnt want to do before, I want to fvcking explore! I just feel a bit lost at the same time. I obviously do not want a girlfriend, im 19, nothing will ever be serious with me until im 30+ . Harry, some steps would be nice, maybe a template roadmap. Mike Ive been playing guitar for 6 years, thats my thing when im not studying. Every women definitely loves the fact that I play an instrument.

So in essence I guess I am just looking for a bit of detailed guidance here. I know muscleman had a goal to get up to what was it , like 100 lays, sh1t id be down to do something like that except not 100 more like 50 :rock:

I also feel like im stuck in a rut. At college there are SO many WOMEN! And yet all I can think about is leaving campus , going to the gym, and studying, then going to work. Thats what I do pretty much everyday. Maybe thats what I really want to break out from. Fvck its just SO hard too.
 

Harry Wilmington

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Again, it depends on what you're looking for. If you want a girlfriend, try getting involved in a few clubs at your school where you'll be around the same set of girls regularly that you can get to know. If you're just looking to bang a few chicks, go to school parties and learn to flirt with the girls there. Admittedly, they'll usually be drunk and down to do more stuff than they usually would.

Ultimately, though, the main advice I have is to (a) keep doing what you're doing, and (b) be aware of incoming signs of interest from girls. When I was in college I was doing my darndest to remain a virgin until I was married (and remained so until the week after I got out of college, lol). Because I wasn't concentrating on getting sex - and girls knew it - I got a lot of interest thrown my way.

You see, girls oftentimes turn down guys who seem too desperate for sex. However, the opposite is also true: when they see a guy that's motivated, doing his own thing, doing well in school, and NOT concentrating on them, it makes them want to try and see if THEY can be the one to break some of his concentration so he'll spend time with them. You being busy makes you more desirable.

The key, then, is to find things to do where you can be busy AND around girls at the same time. This is why school is such a good time for this. Like, I get a good amount of action now, but if I had known then what I know now, I would've probably been laying every girl I went on a date with in college (instead of playing the "gentleman" route and thinking I shouldn't try anything with them). A girl doesn't want a guy that doesn't have anything else going on in his life besides her.

Anyway... when you're doing these busy things around girls, look for signs of interest from them. If they're starting conversations with you, or giving you unprompted compliments, etc., it means they like you. The best way to test this is to simply ask for their phone number. That's it - a simple test, but one that will let you know right out the gate if they have an interest. If they like you, they'll give you the number with no hassle; if they're not sure or don't like you, they'll stammer, stutter, and give you some BS about looking them up on Facebook instead. Don't take it personally, though, just consider it a time-saver.

After that, pretty simple stuff. You're in school so you don't really have to worry too much about taking girls out to expensive places, but try to show 'em a fun time. Let them initiate the touching first (again, if they touch YOU first it means they're comfortable with you, but you can't find that out if you're being Mr. Grabby) and be the LEADER on the date. Assume things are going well - don't ask AFC questions like "Are you okay?" "Are you having a good time?" "Is this restaurant to your satisfaction, mistress??"

Oh, and most importantly: when you're not around these girls, DO NOT INITIATE TEXT MESSAGE CONVERSATIONS! They fell for you 'cause they thought you were busy and unavailable at times (i.e. mysterious), and texting her constantly will only break this myth in their heads. You want them to WORK for your time, not give it up so freely.

That's all I can think of for now, but it's a good start. Hope this helps!
 

Renegade357

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If I was you I'd try to be the best at everything. I'd be playing sports, kicking butt in class, travelling around the world. I'd be doing everything right. Women aren't going anywhere and there are plenty for you to have fun with along the way.
 

Three

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A lot of great advice here. It's like what I would tell my younger self. From my perspective, I can't stress enough to get your college out of the way early on. Knock out that bachelors degree in four years and you'll at least have that as you move forward in life. Struggling with college in your thirties and balancing wife, kids, bills, second jobs, as well as school, is a bitch. Even if you're not looking to get married and have kids, it's so much better to get the basic college education out of the way to give you more options later on.

That leads to another point no one has yet mentioned: Stay out of debt! Spending more than you earn and also getting into credit card and student loan debt is like swimming in quicksand for the rest of your life. You mentioned medical school and student loans probably make sense with that path, but if you're not looking at a high dollar career as soon as you graduate, stay away from borrowing money in any way. Again, saving up a bunch of money and living below your means will give you many more options later on in life.

I totally agree with the hobby stuff mentioned above. It's great that you play guitar. Don't ever give it up and let the skills slip away from you. It's worth more than just picking up girls, but mastery of that skill is something to feel good about and give you confidence for the rest of your life.

I would also suggest that you take up martial arts or boxing or shooting or some other kind of manly activity. Our society has a way of beating the manhood out of us (as you know already or you wouldn't be here) and these skills set you apart as well as being generally useful, not to mention confidence builders. Every man should be able to handle himself in a fight (and know how to avoid one), shoot a gun, fix a flat tire, and take care of basic first aid.
 

JohnChops

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All great advice guys, really appreciate it. Now its time to put this advice into effect. Im looking into trips out of the country that my school offers, they are doing a trip to Belize but I missed one of the meetings im going to hop on this though to see if I can do it. And you get credit for it! Also something else hit me, the world is our lab. The world is our fvcking lab! This is where we test out what we learn here, aka field reports. No idea why it just hit me today but it is a cool realization. Also doing a trip to NY this week, so the travelling has begun! Im fvcking excited. Also im doing a 10 week cut to lose that little bit of extra fat to get myself fully shredded.

Again, really thanks for all the advice, im glad I found this forum last march, best thing I ever did for myself. It opens doors to people who have been there and done that, you guys, so you can help us youngins out or laugh at us because youve been down that road too :p
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

JohnChops

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Espi said:
Know what you want in life and pursue your goals with passion and confidence...live life true to your own spirit...dont be afraid to walk away from anything or anybody...this will put you in a position of power most of the time...dont get married (my opinon only). Work hard and save your money...dress for success...dont expect to land a prime female easily...embrace fear and rejection and learn from them accordingly...the best things in life dont come free or easy...


Fvcking excellent! Yes dress for success, gotta look good. With embracing failure its always a good thing to do for example I did crappy on my physics exam and.now I review every other night and ask questions in class and go to tutoring. Failure motivates me.even more than my self.motivation can.
 

crossedup

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I'm not an older don by any means, but I have made it through college so I can give you some of my insight about that experience.

Number 1 priority is scoring an excellent job out of school. Get this done any way possible! Grades are important, however, your social ability once out of school is critical. Build your connections, make lots of friends. It helped me so much to find this site at 19 as well, because my social ability increased exponentially. Found a good job straight out of college, and now there is free time to do whatever the fvck I want.

You hit the nail on the head with travel. I've begun travelling more recently, but study abroad looks so fvcking cool. Every guy I have talked to who has in the program has gotten far more lays than in the US.

Party as often as you can without getting sh*tfaced. I'm only 22 and alcohol destroys me now. You will also remember everyone you meet at these parties and will leave a much better impression if you aren't a drunk idiot. People will give you a hard time, but ultimately you will be respected when it counts.

JohnChops, your head is in a really good place for being 19. You are going to be fine if you continue to listen to and ask advice of people with experience. Take what you hear and analyze it, then make the best choice for you, it has to be because you want the change, you do this for no one but yourself.

As far as girl advice goes, continue to do what you do. Becoming a better person will attract good women, games and tricks will attract bishes. The more you get out there, the more you see, the more you will have to say in conversation. Develop your own style, and you will be golden. Good luck throughout college, you're on the right track.
 
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