Question about online dating

[Nikar]

Hi all,

I've 1 account on OKCupid and Match.com. The visitor stats are as follows:

1) OKCupid: 8 people view me. 1 message me.

2) Match.com: 9 people viewed me. 1 sent me a wink.

This sort of stats is bad right? Anyone has any experience in these? Because if I'm really that desirable, then at least 5 out of 9 women who viewed my profile would wink / message me right?
So far, I've sent 1 message to 1 chick on Match.com but no reply yet (though it's only 1 day, but I'm not banking on this or putting my hopes into 1 basket).

Pls advise a noob!
Nik

 

[Purefilth]

Look for threads by naughty ninja on quick number grabs. Many guys here are slaying with his methods.

Don't get worried about the stats of who viewed who - its just BS that may get you down if you dwell on it.

Basically they have options galore and views can just be a bored chick looking around with no intention of buying.

 

[Mr. Bond]

I wouldn't say I'm slaying but I am getting a lot farther than I did at first.

Girls (especially hot ones) won't send you messages. You're the man - that's your job!

 

[Iceberg]

Hi all,

I've 1 account on OKCupid and Match.com. The visitor stats are as follows:

1) OKCupid: 8 people view me. 1 message me.

2) Match.com: 9 people viewed me. 1 sent me a wink.

This sort of stats is bad right? Anyone has any experience in these? Because if I'm really that desirable, then at least 5 out of 9 women who viewed my profile would wink / message me right?
So far, I've sent 1 message to 1 chick on Match.com but no reply yet (though it's only 1 day, but I'm not banking on this or putting my hopes into 1 basket).

Pls advise a noob!
Nik

Would 5 out of 9 women on the sidewalk start a conversation with you?

Would 5 out of 9 women at a party ask you for your number?

I think your imagination is running wild with the idea of what "desirable" men experience in online dating. I do well in online dating, and I live in the biggest city in the world...and I might get between 3-5 messages from new women each week. Sometimes it's more like 2-4.

Nobody is getting a 50% success rate from women who visit their profile. Hell, it's hard enough to convince men to initiate a conversation. Now you're expecting women to do it?

Anyway, you're doing fine. It's more about you putting yourself out there. Don't sit back and wait for the women to come to you.

 

[VladPatton]

Online dating is like dumpster diving for cans of caviar. Hey yeah, sure, you may find one, but deep down inside you know it's gonna be a rusty tuna can...on a lucky day!

 

[JohnnyStorm]

High quality women won't be messaging you unless you have Tony Stark's lifestyle and Captain America's body.

The fact that you have some messages, means that you probably have something going for you.
Definitely see the naughty ninja threads re: POF.

Just remember to not waste too much time with online dating. Spam dem ho's!

 

[incognito42]

Read the countless plenty of fish help threads. Naughty ninja has a couple good ones as well as others from here

 

[Nikar]

Tks a lot guys! Btw, on Match.com, some chicks specify that they want a certain type of guy in their profile, like "must earn $75,000" a year etc....I assume you guys ignore these chicks if your salary isn't up to their expectations? LOL

 

[Nikar]

Oh, and another thing: on Match.com, most of the people there don't seem to be paid subscribers? Only paid subscribers can send and receive messages, so that means most girls don't even receive the messages I sent?

 

[alphamailman]

Online dating is wack.

 

[incognito42]

Tks a lot guys! Btw, on Match.com, some chicks specify that they want a certain type of guy in their profile, like "must earn $75,000" a year etc....I assume you guys ignore these chicks if your salary isn't up to their expectations? LOL

I'd ignore them even if my salary did meet their standards. Unless I was just looking for sex in which case my salary wouldn't matter to her if she was open to only getting pumped and dumped

Its a huge turnoff when chicks have a lost of demands like it's a hostage negotiation rather than an interaction between two people looking for love or booty. If the chick says the guy must have a car and job that's about the MOST demanding I can tolerate, and even that's a little bit of a turnoff to be in a girls profile.

Height, hair, job, car requirement while may be somewhat understandable from th girls perspective is a huge turnoff to have listed in her profile as prerequisites to message her and a huge red flag for me about what type of girl she probably is

 

[pdx1138]

High quality women won't be messaging you unless you have Tony Stark's lifestyle and Captain America's body.

The Hottest women won't be messaging you unless you have Tony Stark's lifestyle and Captain America's body.

(fixed it for you lol)

Agreed about the salary range on Match. HUGE turnoff.
Might as well just get a hot escort and pay for her to leave.

One aspect of online dating is, sometimes you'll go weeks sending out messages and get nothing, then
one day you send out a few and get interested responses from all. It never rains but it pours.

Lately I've been getting lots of interest from asian chicks.

Get used to flakey behaviour and lots of rejection, which is an added benefit if you have
anxiety approaching in the real world. Soon enough it won't phase you in the slightest.

 

[Nikar]

Man, I feel totally enlightened after reading all these replies here.
Thanks guys; will stick around on the sites and see what goes.

 

[Nikar]

Hi guys! Need advice again.

So, this girl whose profile I like (her personality suits me) message me first and commented that I have a nice profile. LOL

Since we both like painting (based on her profile), I replied by asking her what style of painting she does.
She reply by saying impressionist (about one line of sentence) with "hahaha" and signing off with "good day to you". (since I previously sign off with "Good day!" too )

What do I say to her now? Ask her to show me pictures of her paintings? (it's tedious since she probably has no scanner)
Or should I say stuff like "So, what is it about my profile that caught your attention? That I'm a good boy?" etc.?

I need some stuff to say to her to open her up, but can't think of anything. Good to have someone analyse the situation too.

Tks!
Nik

(this girl is a stay-at-home religious type and doesn't list "likes to travel" in her profile, which is rare among female profiles)

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Hi guys! Need advice again.

So, this girl whose profile I like (her personality suits me) message me first and commented that I have a nice profile. LOL

Since we both like painting (based on her profile), I replied by asking her what style of painting she does.
She reply by saying impressionist (about one line of sentence) with "hahaha" and signing off with "good day to you". (since I previously sign off with "Good day!" too )

What do I say to her now? Ask her to show me pictures of her paintings? (it's tedious since she probably has no scanner)
Or should I say stuff like "So, what is it about my profile that caught your attention? That I'm a good boy?" etc.?

I need some stuff to say to her to open her up, but can't think of anything. Good to have someone analyse the situation too.

Tks!
Nik

(this girl is a stay-at-home religious type and doesn't list "likes to travel" in her profile, which is rare among female profiles)

I'm not going to keep repeating myself with the same advice that's been in threads all over the site about chicks who use online dating and or their profile fluff filler.

What you need to be doing right now since she's written is reply back to her off of this line: "She reply by saying impressionist"

"Oh so you're an impressionist? You'll have to show me some of your impressions! I hope your not doing a Lennay Kekua impression and going to Manti Te'o' me. I prefer the real deal. lol I do impressions myself. I can do a mean ("Tom Cruise jumping up and down on the couch/ Stewie from Family Guy/ or pick a funny movie character or celebrity") impression! lol. I'm not on here much. Feel free to give me your number and I'll give you a call sometime to chat, then see your works of art from the Artist herself. (Your real first name) =)"


With that reply you are cutting right to the chase.

You know what she means by impressionist but you're teasing her slightly in a humorous way letting her know you are fun and calling her out right away to give you her number to meet up and see her "Works of art". (Throwing in some sexual innuendo suggestion).

No time to be email pen pals. You have to move quick and go for the number and a meet. You can BS all you want in person. Online Bsing usually just wastes your time.

Reply back what I put in red. Don't use the quotes though " ". She may send her number right away. If not maybe back and forth two to three more emails. If no number from her by then keep it moving and drop it.

 

[Nikar]

Wow, it's NaughtyNinja! Tks a lot! Will try your advice.

 

[incognito42]

I know, its amazing that he graces us with his presence from time to time

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

I look at nothing except photos in my initial email. I don't read profiles at all. I'm not wasting time on chicks that don't move me below the belt.

And don't think for a second that women online don't do the same. They do. Look the best in your pictures, that's the best way to increase your response rate.