"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Question about looks in hs dating.

tothefacedawg

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I feel myself letting up on opportunities because i feel like i don't look good enough i know this is weak and im building up on it gaining confidence and such and suggestions/ how much do you think looks affect dating in HS? thanks
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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jeffthechef

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haha let's get straight to the key points.

1. Girls care more about looks in HS but less as they get older cause money and security become bigger issues.

2. Social value matters probably just as much as looks in HS. Social value means less as you get older because "power" becomes more important. I'm not going to get into the difference between power and social value.

3. Don't worry about your looks.

Study hard, that's the point of hs, to get to college. Build a strong relationship with your family. You're going to leave, and you'll miss them. You'll probably need them too for osmething later on. Focus on inner development. Focus ALSO on outer development.

I used to think being physically strong was useless, however i think it was because i myself was skinny. I didn't want to think that i was inferior, however i realize now that it was an opportunity to improve. Bruce Lee taught me that haha...

Although you can't change your looks, aside from plastic surgery and allt hat ****, you can workout/lift weights. Bruce Lee believed physical strength was just as important as mental/spiritual/moral strength. All these aspects of YOU, can be improved. So worry about what you can improve, all other things are not of importance.
 

eaglez1177

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^I agree with all of what jeff said, and just to expand upon the looks part, theres still a lot you can do to improve your looks.

-Lift weights and get muscular (girls LOVE muscular guys)
-Clean your face up if you have acne (wash twice a day and use acne cream)
-Keep yourself well groomed
-If your in a place where you can get a tan, definitely go for that too
-Get a good nights sleep
-Eat healthy
 

needstochange

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Exactly what they said. Taking care of yourself and finding/pursuing your passion and dreams is something women find attractive. Plus it's something you should be doing in HS.
 

tothefacedawg

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thanks for the replys guys! there is this girl id like to try and get with and have something with she says she likes guys that arent wasting her time so like im not too sure what to say to her when we talk it seems like the convo just dies down any suggestions?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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thedoc

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I definitely agree with the previous posts but I'm also noticing that looks are becoming less and less important. Tonight I went out on a basically blind date with a girl whose past boyfriends were much better looking and much more jacked than me. I'd say it went well ;).
 

Audiophile

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Looks barely matter, I don't care who the hell you are, unless you have some extreme disease that deforms your face, looks are not the limiting factor on your attraction. We are all in highschool, so I will concede that in highschool, girls are much more superficial, but even then looks are only in yer head.

I see these other guys here saying "Yeah man! That's your problem, go FIX IT". But, thats not the root problem, its all you. If you can destroy that mental blockade most people have that limits their game to their looks, you will do 10x better with girls. If you care about your looks, you are essentially placing better looking girls on a pedestal, which is not what you want at all.

What I will agree with is Jeff in this topic, because what he said is 100% true. Focus on learning, but mainly focus on yourself. Going to the gym is for yourself! If you go to the gym to impress the opposite sex, that's a terrible mindset, which will eventually deteriorate.

Again, looks are a mental obstruction you put up for yourself. If you are trying to get with a girl that only cares about looks, then she is not worth your time.

Now I'm not saying you shouldn't clean up, what I'm saying is that you shouldn't focus so much energy on just your looks when it isn't the biggest factor to getting girls in highschool.
 
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