"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Question about approaches

trainee

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I have doing approaches during the day lately using a direct line usually something like,

"I know this is random but I think you are cute and I wanted see what you are like."

The problem is that a couple of times the first thing they say is I have a boyfriend. I have looked for bf destroyers but they seem to be used when the girl brings up the bf in the middle of the conversation not right at the beginning. Does it mean that they are not interested in me right off the bat?

I just left after saying ok but is there a way to deal with this.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Scars

Master Don Juan
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It's a bit too forward. You're making it too obvious you're hitting on them without first establishing some rapport. You want to be direct, but not without a little small talk first. Although you have the confidence to approach you're still missing two main ingredients. You need to establish some rapport, and you need to display higher value of yourself. Your opener is a bit needy, try to save the compliments for later on. Reward them by telling them they're cute right after they give you their number, know what I mean?
 

Guitar_Whizz

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trainee said:
I have doing approaches during the day lately using a direct line usually something like,

"I know this is random but I think you are cute and I wanted see what you are like.".
It's fine to be Direct in the daytime. I have done a lot of Direct daytime approaches and gotten great responses. Your problem is the first part of your opener: "I know this is random but..."

You don't need to say that. That just makes you come across like you're making excuses or apologising for talking to her. Chicks will feel you insecurity if you say that, and as a result you'll get a negative response.

Instead, open with something like "Excuse me...I just wanted to say you're one of the best looking girls I've seen all day, and I thought I'd stop and meet you".

trainee said:
The problem is that a couple of times the first thing they say is I have a boyfriend. .".
Again, you probably wouldn't get that response so much if you said your opener more confidently and in the way I suggested above.

trainee said:
I have looked for bf destroyers but they seem to be used when the girl brings up the bf in the middle of the conversation not right at the beginning. Does it mean that they are not interested in me right off the bat?.".
You can use a bf destroyer anytime a girl mentions a bf, whether it's at the start or in the middle of a conversation. The best bf destroyer I've used is "Oh right, so what's it like being in the perfect relationship then?". Usually the girl will say "Oh, it's not perfect", and then you can ask her why and just let her start saying negative things about her bf, thus planting seeds of doubt in her mind. Whatever you do, DO NOT say anything bad about her bf yourself...let HER say the negative things, so they'll seem more real to her.

If a girl mentions a bf, it could just be a default response, it might not actually be true. Or it might genuinely be true. You could reply with "Hey, who said anything about your bf? I just wanted to tell you you were cute". Put her on the defensive.
 
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