"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Question about 2 things

DamHE

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Hi,

This is about 2 different things.

Let me give a bit of back ground information - Before Friday I wasn't really like a popular kid in class, I was kind of quiet even though every one was friendly with me. On Friday we had to present our projects that we'd been working on for a month and I (not trying to brag) totally aced it, I was confident and smiling the whole way through, I tossed in a joke when appropriate, everyone else was just mumbling about theirs but I was including audience participation right.. And while I was up in the front of class I noticed the hottest girl in our class (like a 9.5) smiling at me but not like everyone else was.. Everyone else just laughed when I said something funny but she had her eyes were burning into me and she was smiling the whole way through but I didn't look at her because 1) when I present stuff I always look at a large group not one single person (aka left side of class not just one person on the extreme left) and 2) I didn't really care (I'll explain below) and finished my presentation. After that everyone was talking to me and laughing and joking and I got to chat with people who normally wouldn't talk to me.

Then on Monday (yesterday) we made eye contact several times and I did some C+F with her in one class because I was curious why she had that look on her face on Friday, and she was all laughing right. But today we didn't make eye contact at all and didn't speak to each other. I saw her glance at me once out of the corner of my eye but thats it. The question for this one is how come there is this sudden change in behavior? What should I do for the next couple of days?

The reason I didn't care when she was burning into me was because A) I knew if I even thought about her I would screw up my presentation and B) she's gone out with alot of boys so it's kind of like ... I don't know.. And I have only had 1 girlfriend before and Idk it's hard to explain.

Also my second question. This happened to me once on Monday and once today. On Monday we passed each other and when I looked at her eyes she was already looking at me and immediately glanced down at her feet .. This same thing happened today but with some stranger on the street... What does that mean????
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Drones200

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Look at her next time you make eye contact and smile back. If she smiles at you to go in and play your game, simple. Make sure to get her number, if shes looking at you is probrably cause she has interest in you, she woulnt look at you if you were ugly to her or dint find you attractive.
 

The Shocker

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Good advice Drones. Remember, girls can be intimidated pretty easily, especially if they like you and they're not sure if you like them. They feel the same way we do when we do a cold approach.

She may be playing games also. The classic push/pull. You can play games back too, that will intrigue her, but I'd first talk to her and run some C+F by her tomorrow. Gauge her response, if she doesn't seem as enthusiastic as last week, it may mean that she wasn't really that interested.
 

DamHE

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I didn't get a chance to speak to her tooday but I'm sure that this was just a game of HUGE PULL / BIGGER PUSH :( .

Oh well there are others.

If it's one thing I learned from this it's don't think a girl likes you unless you are going out.
 

bigw

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You're giving up too soon. Keep going for it until you get proper evidence that she's unattracted to you.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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DamHE

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Thanks BigW,

I don't know if she likes me or it's push / pull . She said my name and I turned around and she pretended to flick something at me and started giggling..? And also she looked at me a couple times but we didn't make eye contact because it was only glances at me .. By the time I looked her way she was talking to her friends again. And also everyone says to smile when you make eye contact.. Is it like a big happy grin or what??? I don't want to look like Mickey Mouse at Disney World.

It's just hard for me to believe that she even looks at me for longer than the occasional glance because it's like.. I'm not used to it. So one half of me is like "if you think she likes you and then she really doesn't then you'll be all crushed". But the other half is like "maybe she likes you". So IDK.
 

Patrick124

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DamHE said:
If it's one thing I learned from this it's don't think a girl likes you unless you are going out.
no. assume a girl likes you until you get turned down or sense rejection on its way.
you're the man, remeber. you're not a small fish in a big pod, you're the fvcking lochness monster.
 

Grand Wizzard Alamar

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Man, don't give up. next time you see her just immediately say hi and start talking about stuff.. try asking her for her phone # or IM, and get to know her a little. Throw in as much C+F as you can, I'm sure she'll enjoy it, and try some kino if you get the chance (arm on the shoulder, ask for a hug, etc).
If you really like her, don't waste any time, because SHE WANTS YOU!
 

DamHE

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Whenever I'm around her I want to say something but it's hard to think of something.
 

bigw

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DamHE said:
Thanks BigW,

I don't know if she likes me or it's push / pull . She said my name and I turned around and she pretended to flick something at me and started giggling..? And also she looked at me a couple times but we didn't make eye contact because it was only glances at me .. By the time I looked her way she was talking to her friends again. And also everyone says to smile when you make eye contact.. Is it like a big happy grin or what??? I don't want to look like Mickey Mouse at Disney World.

It's just hard for me to believe that she even looks at me for longer than the occasional glance because it's like.. I'm not used to it. So one half of me is like "if you think she likes you and then she really doesn't then you'll be all crushed". But the other half is like "maybe she likes you". So IDK.

There's some of your problem. You're worried about her rejecting you. By the sounds of it she definitely isn't. I'd go for it, but I wouldn't worry if she turned you down.

When you smile, just a normal smile, nothing way too enthusiastic. You're right, don't look like mickey mouse at disney world :p

Haha by the signals she's giving you I'd be taking it up ;)
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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DamHE

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I said Hi to her today and she just stared at me.

Whatever.
 
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