"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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quantify, quantify, quantify

2ndTour

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Quantifying pick up attempts

Here’s something I have been doing since I started using this site about a year ago:

Every encounter I had with a girl (anything from a “hello” to a number close) I wrote down, with a rating out of one to ten as to how well I did with the girl, and then a minor comment, such as:
1) 1 point, was completely ignored
2) 3 points, friendly, but no number
3) 7 points, gave name (anne) and number with smile

My rating system was like this:

A) Girl completely snubs me, or is a b*tch – 1 point (always give yourself at least a point for trying)
B) Number Close – 5-7 points
C) Date with make-out – 8-9
D) Got laid – 10

This way, you can judge your improvement by the numbers.
Because sometimes you may be thinking “I’ve asked hundreds of girls out, and they all rejected me” – but this is exaggerating the problem. When you have the ACTUAL numbers, you will see that they’re probably not that high, and you’re actually doing not too bad, in relation to the number of attempts you’ve made.

The other thing cool about this is that you can progress more quickly by quantifying a target. If you talk to 1 girl/week for a year, that’s 52 attempts. But if you force 10 attempts/day for a week, that’s already 70 in ONE WEEK. (You have 70 guaranteed points in a week- and the “gods of getting you laid” notice this kind of effort) Setting the number itself will propel you forward.

See, “I will get laid by a hot chick this year” is a good goal, but its kind of vague, and in a way depends on another person (the chick wanting to lay you)– whereas the goal of “I will approach 70 women this week, ” – well, nobody is in the way of that, but you, and it is very specific.

Eventually you will have enough success that you won’t have to record minor flirtations anymore (especially if you say “hi” to fifty women a day), and you can stick to recording overt successes (ie. you got laid). But at first, you should put them all down.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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mistyc

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Sounds like another post in here, from last year or so!

Bur great idea!
Make everything sound like progress, success, and you'll start feeling better.

As Thomas Edison said.. "I have never failed. I have only found 10 000 ways that don't work" (and acquired a lot of experience in the process)
 

Ricky

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I think this is excellent. I have thought of things like this even for work. I look at it like this. Michael Jordan can look back at what he did on April 15, 1998 and say hey I scored 35 points against the Lakers or whoever. But I thought of it at work, how do I know I was productive, without a better way of quantifying it. There needs to be a good method!

Same thing when you go to a gym if you don't record the weights you lifted, you don't know if you are improving, so I do record them most of the time.

Excellent way when applied to women, it keeps you honest and working harder. I love it!
 

Guitar_Whizz

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That's a bloody good idea I think I'll try it. Something to give me extra motivation to go out and meet chicks
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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djbr

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Finished bumping all 2ndTour's posts. :D

"Gods of getting you laid", hahahahaha... well, they are watching us! :cheer:
 

ApocalypseCow2

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I keep a spreadsheet with all my data. If you want to get better at ANYTHING, you HAVE to keep stats. How much weight you can bench press, how many girls you approach, how many miles you ran, etc...
 

al77

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Originally posted by 2ndTour
Quantifying pick up attempts

This way, you can judge your improvement by the numbers.
Because sometimes you may be thinking “I’ve asked hundreds of girls out, and they all rejected me”
Well...one thing that you do by that is to put more pressure to her her phone number. I dont think you want to have MORE pressure.

I think quantifying should encourage learning and skills, and not the results. who care if you got 10 esy numbers from ho like gals and got laid? You still ive yourself points?

I think it would be a good idea to reward some good approaches, i.e. approaches when you said some good c&f stuff.
So you gotta focus on what you actually said... and if she laugh at it or at least smiles. Laugh +10 points, smile +7. appoach with saying c&f +3. Approach without saying c&f -3.
Just a suggestion.
 
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