"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Pumped

Al Moh.

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Guys, since today is my birthday, I have been on this website for exactly one year now.

As you probably already realised, DJing isn't a skill you can learn like a subject in school, but something that is created by constantly putting yourself on the line.

I always adopted some kind of technique, some kind of mindset and went out. Sometimes I failed. Sometimes I succeeded. Sometimes I succeeded in my goal but then saw that my goal was flawed and this "achievement" caused me a lot of trouble.

It's true, this is not about the women, it's about you. My look on this world has changed, my relationsship to women, to my friends and to strangers has changed.

You see, those techniques and articles here are great but the main point of all of this is to get you out of your shell. Your best teacher will always be life, not some strangers on an internet site. This website can show you the right doors, you have to walk through them. Right doors? Doors to success and happiness? Think long term. Sometimes it is necessary to mess up, to almost loose friends like I did for example.

Don't get caught up in chasing women. Don't let your mind chase women. Your mind is the source of your actions, it's in your mind where the battles are.

Freedom isn't about cutting yourself loose from people but having the choice which people should be in your life. You will always need friends and you'll always need love and affection to some degree, after all you are human. But you can learn to get it from certain people, to choose who to date and who to be friends with and who to listen to.

I don't believe anymore that us being "nice" was the problem in the first place. I love being "nice". I love to make people smile and laugh and doing them some favors. As long as they give me respect and I know they would do the same thing to me. It's desperation and weakness that kills the AFC. And you know what? In his core, the AFC isn't nice. He hates hisself and he is jealous of people.

What else is there to say? I'd like to wish you the best and good luck even though I am not going to build my future on having luck ;)

Oh yeah, follow your dreams and mess up as much as you can ;) It makes you wiser and more relaxed on the inside.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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imarockstar

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happy birthday bro! good post. I like how you describe the AFC. When I first came here, I read too much into the nice guy vs the jerk. I read into ****y and funny. I almost let myself overdo it all, but then I realized Ive been a don juan all along. Well maybe years and years ago I was AFC, but the past few years, Ive been nice to women while being fun.

Guys, theres nothing wrong with giving women compliments. A month ago some chick was watching a victorias secret fashion show. The models were asked what were the cheesiest lines theyve ever heard. i.e. " Did it hurt......when you fell from heaven" etc etc. But the women said just come and introduce yourself, and if youre smooth tell them theyre beautiful.

I understand that you need to build rapport, teasing her in a playful way, and DHV stories are great. I just feel some guys may think you need to be a jerk in order to get women, which is not true. The key is not to be desperate. You dont need to buy her flowers everyday, but once in a blue moon is good, women love that s*it.

I can speak first hand of this because a few days I made a thread about wanting my ex back. I only wanted her back because of some personal issues, and I felt desperate. I dont have a girl I talk to seriously, everyday, although I have many girls that I talk to on occasion that I feel are interested in me. My problem was I wanted a girlfriend again because I was desperate and lonely and I wanted her to hold me and tell me everythings gonna be alright. BS

Now Im fine and I realize that wouldve been a huge mistake. I wouldve regretted getting back with her. Sorry I just went completely off subject, but I had to demonstrate how desperation needs to be cut out of your life.

Guys this site is great, but talking to women is a lot less complex than we make it. You dont need to make sure you use C+F, push pull, DHV story, repeat etc like its a routine. Just talk to the girl and know that you dont need her, you want to invite her to join your journey and enjoy your company, but YOU DO NOT NEED A GF
 

Voice

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Nice man, this puts a lot of things in perspective. This website is more about self-improvement than just getting chicks. It sounds like you got your priorities right. What you said is what a lot of people including myself are missing.
 
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