PuertoRican_Lover--Question..

[yankees13]

Hi

You always seem to give me good advice, hopefully you will remember me, which i think you do here is the post if you dont remember
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=41198

Here is a update after completely forgetting about her


Back in class vacation is over, i have a evening class with her. First day nothing really happened sat way on the right of her.. Then during class break i went to get coffee when i came out of the elevator and started walking towards my class i noticed her and her friend, im pretty good friends with her friend so we chit chatted, and she was talking to me also smiling, laughing at my jokes.. She even said damn your the only guy in class and started giggling. Then i told them another joke that had to to do with a previous teacher and they both started laughing hard, and iwent back to class.

Then i sat in my chair and i got up and went to sit next to another girl who i know has a crush on me but im not really interested ,we talked, then she walked in and saw me talking to her and when she saw me talking to her she gave like a kind of puzzled look "damn he is a playa, or damn he doesnt waste time, or forgets things quickly"

On Day 2

I came in early and she was standing by class we had an i would say 10 minute conversation about classes, teachers etc, she laughed at few jokes etc. At one point she offered to give me a book for another class im taking which i didnt have (no clue why, how generous a $100 book), rest of class i was talking to my friends i made few funny comments in class in which she turned around everytime and started laughing..During break we talked about different stuff with her and her friends.

Just wondering im still interested in her, any chance she realizes that she screwed up and wants to patch up things and start over? Or maybe she is just friendly to patch up the akwardness between us.?

I think one way for sure for me to find out what the deal is when we have a conversation, just tell her. "Jessica so seriously last semester what was the deal, you just played me like that, if you werent feeling me you should of have told me instead of playing games.Or was there another reason? < Would that be appropriate thing to say.?

My thinking is that she refused to hang out last time because she thought i wasnt serious at all. Because when i told her i had my eye on her last semester, she giggled and said yea right..

What do you think?

 

[MVPlaya]

Yankee, you've been her for a year. I'm sure you're aware you can PM PR_L

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

You shouldn't have told her you had an eye on her last semester. One thing is to give her some nice words and get her IL then go away to let it sink inn and make her miss you is ONE thing. Telling her something then doing something that makes your words seem like garbage (as in you were lying or that she cannot trust you) is often NOT good.

I didn't read the old thread and I'm sort of hazy after yesterdays alcohol but if I read it right that's atleast my opinion

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

yes yankees, I recall your situation. You weren't thinking about this throughout the whole semester break - were you

You stated that she was shy or a quiet type (my kind of girl - by the way) and these girls are harder to get because they want to feel comfortable with someone before they give themselves or their number out to you.

But I think she knows you enough from your class room antics and seems to enjoy your commentary. This is a big plus for you because you know she is comfortable with the kind of person that you are. However, if you are always joking then maybe she didn't take you seriously on the romantic side when you stated your interest in her last semester. I don't know - but shy women don't like to be played (as they say) that is why they are reserved and are usually loyal to one man.

When she gave you the 'look' for talking to this other female in class she may have labeled you as a player because you didn't follow through where you left off with her last semester and she thinks you are moving on to other girls and thus reinforcing her perception of you.

To end all the confusing signals - I would make a concrete gesture (don't take the word literally - I don't want you to hit her over the head with a bucket of cement) to her alone - make sure no friends or others around - and ask her if she would like to study together and share a pizza afterwards at a public place. If impossible or if she is allergic to cheese - then make a counter-offer and if she still says no then you have done your duty.

Do not do what you said you might do in your post ...see the following....

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"Just wondering im still interested in her, any chance she realizes that she screwed up and wants to patch up things and start over? Or maybe she is just friendly to patch up the akwardness between us.?

I think one way for sure for me to find out what the deal is when we have a conversation, just tell her. "Jessica so seriously last semester what was the deal, you just played me like that, if you werent feeling me you should of have told me instead of playing games.Or was there another reason? < Would that be appropriate thing to say.?"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The above sounds like 'playa' talk and will turn off some women, especially shy ones.

Don't bring up anything negative or mention last semester - start fresh and move forward. You have her laughing and in a good mood, for crying out softly (I have a hangover), now you are going to ruin this rapport by telling her that she 'played you and she is playing games'.

Remember, your goal is to get her tongue in your mouth and not your foot

 

[yankees13]

Well i cant PM him because his mailbox is full... but anyways

Hi

Thanks for your reply. Although your advice sounds pretty good. I dont really like asking her again because i already did that once. And even i did i am not willing to take the risk of being turned down or played at least not by her.. Is there any other way you can think of i may find out if she is interested?

 

[yankees13]

I forgot to mention. She also is getting little more personal asking what do i do between my 1030am and 545pm class

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by yankees13
Well i cant PM him because his mailbox is full... but anyways

Hi

Thanks for your reply. Although your advice sounds pretty good. I dont really like asking her again because i already did that once. And even i did i am not willing to take the risk of being turned down or played at least not by her.. Is there any other way you can think of i may find out if she is interested?

first of all, she really didn't "play you" as you were saying. she just didn't show up at the scheduled time. no big deal, bro. forget about it. don't bring it up because you're making it sound like she blew you out on a date--which it wasn't. you're making something out of nothing, which chicks (people) don't like, especially when directed at them personally.

she already knows that you made an attempt to get with her in private. she knows she didn't attend. just keep the good convo up, grow some balls, and ask her out for a real date (something that has absolutely nothing to do with school). it sounds like you have good rapport with her and it sounds like you'll get a yes answer.

it really is that simple.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by yankees13
I forgot to mention. She also is getting little more personal asking what do i do between my 1030am and 545pm class

she is interested in you. drop a subtle hint about what you're doing during this period, but be vague about it. don't say "nothing"!

for all you know, she's been obsessing over you during your vactation! you're never gonna know if you don't make a move.

 

[yankees13]

TooCold,


Your response does not make sense, and she did play me. Please read my original post at the top, and you will know the story

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

my man - you said she seems to be interested in you and you are interested in her - and yes she did flake on you and since you don't want to ask her out because of this slight you are iin limbo right now.

Since you don't like the direct approach because you want to save face in case of rejection the only soution is an indirect invite that doesn't put you on the spot --- maybe you could do a group thing with her girlfriend, her, you, and others. Or impress the heck out of her, and wait til she asks you out.

Next time she gives you an open door by asking you what you do after class (this is obvious interest) tell her -- "what, are you asking me out" smiling as you make statement.

The last thing you can do is bring up the situation that happened last semester- but I think that should have been done the day after the event happened and not 4 weeks later - this only shows her that this still bothers you and i think it will give her more power over you.

If you do bring up the past situation - do it in a polite way that shows her that you were offended and state that maybe there was a misunderstanding or a failure in your communication.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by yankees13
TooCold,


Your response does not make sense, and she did play me. Please read my original post at the top, and you will know the story

i read the whole damn thing. what you had with her wasn't a serious and solid meeting. okay, you agreed to meet on that monday after class...

"Then i was like how bout we chill Monday after class, she said what time? I said after class when we get out at 2, 2 second break and she smiled and said yea ok"

bfd? seriously, if you think this is getting played, you don't have much experience. "chill Monday after class" is a weak move. it begs getting blown out. it's BORING. anyway, this is old news--forget about it.

she's interested in you if she's asking you personal questions and such. it looks like this is your situation to fvck up. just be cool about it.

try a little kino on the arm, hand, or shoulder and see if she returns it (not necessarily right away, though). ask her out on a real DATE, with something fun and specific. if she blows you out on this, THEN you've been played.

if you wait any longer, you're risking her losing interest. you're risking her thinking you're scared or intimidated. you both know you like each other, so do it. forget about this "after class" blowout bs. again, for all you know, this was a test to see if you have any balls. if so, you're getting a solid "D" right now.

keep us updated.

 

[yankees13]

Puerto, TooCold


Thanks for the responses.I will attemp to ask her out again.. I just dont understand if u say she is interested, why did she stood me up like that the first time.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by yankees13
Puerto, TooCold


Thanks for the responses.I will attemp to ask her out again.. I just dont understand if u say she is interested, why did she stood me up like that the first time.

FORGET ABOUT THIS!!! IT DOESN'T MATTER!!!

if it was a real date, where you showered, shaved, sh!tted, made plans, drove out of your way, etc...and she blew you out, then that's another thing.

i think this is your problem...you're afraid to ask her because you think she rejected you already. she didn't bro.

chicks can smell fear a mile away. so don't "attempt" to ask her out. don't be vague about it. do it flat out and very specifically and completely non-school related.

make sure it's something fun where you can engage each other physically, like an amusement park or something. if she does turn you down, then you say, "what...you don't like to have fun...okay..." then don't contact her for a while and see what she does.

you're making too much of this.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Originally posted by TooColdUlrick
FORGET ABOUT THIS!!! IT DOESN'T MATTER!!!

if it was a real date, where you showered, shaved, sh!tted, made plans, drove out of your way, etc...and she blew you out, then that's another thing.

i think this is your problem...you're afraid to ask her because you think she rejected you already. she didn't bro.

chicks can smell fear a mile away. so don't "attempt" to ask her out. don't be vague about it. do it flat out and very specifically and completely non-school related.

make sure it's something fun where you can engage each other physically, like an amusement park or something. if she does turn you down, then you say, "what...you don't like to have fun...okay..." then don't contact her for a while and see what she does.

you're making too much of this.

Ditto!