Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Protecting that Heart

SamePendo

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Protect that heart
That is, in my opinion, Anti-Dump's best advice ever given, in just three words.

We will often see posts made on what to do with a certain girl. They ask if they should keep calling, keep trying, keep emailing, etc. This is exactly one-itis. They are thinking too much on this one girl. We also get women asking on this subject, wether to keep trying with this certain guy. The general answer to this questions is to forget about this girl, and next her. I agree, but if you are asking advice on this subject, is probably because you havent lived through it before. So, if you listen, and stop trying, and next him-her, great. If not, by all means, give it a shot. Continue, but always with the DJ principles in mind ofcourse. My advice is to go forward.

But, always protecting your heart. Always. How do you protect your heart when going forward with this certain person? Even if she-he isnt the one-itis person, you must always be investing your time in at least another person (girl-boy). Girl no.2 works as a protection. If your one-itis rejects you (if she is one-itis, she WILL reject you, just because she is one-itis.) you can move on immediately on to girl no.2. If you just had your time into only this one girl, when rejected, you would have nowhere to keep growing, no cushion. Now that you DO have girl no.2, the instant girl no.1 rejects you, you go onto girl no.2 and make the pain of rejection much lighter, because you didnt have all your hopes on girl no.2. Always have your time invested in at least 2 women.
 

***

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To me this is wrong. You will never know truth until you are able to genuinely be yourself. This way you never feel regret for holding back something you really wanted to say because of others. This tip, in the context that you wrote it in,(how I interpreted it) sounds like fear of commitment or the realization that you are imperfect.
 
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SamePendo

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I like you

I just read your thread. Liked it.

To me this is wrong. You will never know truth until you are able to genuinely be yourself. This way you never feel regret for holding back something you really wanted to say because of others.
I agree with you totally.

This tip, in the context that you wrote it in, sounds like fear of commitment or the realization that you are imperfect.
What context does my tip happen to be?, I didnt understand your point here...
 

VIVAlasVEGASBaby

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I don't like the idea of using another person as a fail-safe. Having many GIRL FRIENDS (note the space), is fine. You make it sound like having two "girlfriends".

Now in High School I am going to try to avoid "girlfriends" for at least a while. I think i'm going to try for the date many girls as "friends" routine (have fun, no commitment, and once more HAVE FUN!!!!). Which i think will keep me out of oneitis for good. I probably interpreted this wrong, but when I was reading this I basically read in my mind;

Have a girlfriend, who you have one-itis for, but make sure you have a ***** you can fall back on to keep your confidence and happiness going. Which will somehow cure one-itis.

Again, I probably mis-interpreted this. That is just how I understood what you said...
 

SamePendo

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Great going!

Both of you disagreed, but have excellent points. I feel, that both misinterpreted me though...
Its more like, if you have a PROSPECT (not girlfriend, just someone you are interested in and are in the pre-date stage, or dating stage only).. and you are meanwhile spending your time on another woman also, so if this girl you liked so much (and she didnt, you just fantasized) dumps you, you have girl no.2 to continue to meet.

This does not apply at the time when you have a girlfriend. When you have a girlfiend, what you said is a very good option to take.
 

Pook

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The 'Protect that heart' means making sure that the person you DO open up to REALLY likes you. You know she likes you with her consistant good behavior.

You are always 'genuine'. You are not acting like someone else. You are simply aware of the the fact that just because a woman dates you, it does not mean she truly likes you.

Before, dating was a path towards marriage. Nowadays, especially for women, it is a type of entertainment. Just because she dates you means NOTHING. A guy can easily get burned.

Yes, she can even be having sex with you and not give a real care about you.

From the cradle, we are surrounded by ignorance. Two masters guide our paths. The first is brutal, it is the master EXPERIENCE. The second is more gentle, it is the master FORESIGHT. You do not need to be burned again and again to know what to do.

Why would you throw your heart out there to be stomped on again and again? You wouldn't do that to your friend, would you? No, you protect your heart at the beginning.

Weed them out. Eventually, you will get one that likes you because of you. It is Anti-Dump's machine that leads you to the ONE.
 
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no i agree with the thread starter " always have two at least".
look women play this game too ok so it doesnt matter if you do it to one of them . play the game and if you hurt some one that will teach him or her the same lesson AFC 's learn ok its a game and that is it.


i admit ive been played like this and it sucked but you live and you learn that is the way it is.


you know what this is a competitive world let them suffer likje i did.


:D
 
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