"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Prom? Crazy!

TonyTheTigerOI

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Background:
17 years old. I turn 18 in April. I look 20-25 depending on the day
I am a senior in high school. I attend a local college as well
I am handsome (9.1-4 depending on the day)
I am a good dancer. A great kisser. A better talker
I don’t have a lot of experience fvckclosing
I am tougher than most kids in my area (1st tier suburb) but I am not a “tough kid’
I play soccer for a very good premier club, the state team, and the school team

The Story:
I transferred from the “rival school” during the first week of my sophomore year. One of the most popular kids in school at the time, a senior, was picking on me during my lunch period. I calmly walked up to him, put one hand on his shoulder and smiled... took a breath, as if to say something... and punched him in the face. His head it a wall he was leaning against, he fell over, and he never spoke to me again.

All that week girls were approaching me like crazy. Everyone wanted to know my life story. I laughed, dodged their questions, and asked them about themselves. At the first dance I grinded with all of the hottest seniors... but none of the girls my age. The next week, a cute Italian girl in my social studies class asked me to hang out, I dodged the question, as I was seeing a 19 year old from a local community college and didn’t care to date someone from my school.

All throughout the soccer season girls would approach me, I got invited to a few “jock parties” but I never went. Frankly, I didn’t want to hang out with any guys from my school. They were losers – they followed around girls, gossiped, and bickered all day long.

In gym class I got into another scuffle with a popular guy, this time one my age. That was the last straw... popular kids in my grade just turned their backs on me. I have 3 good friends my age who attend my HS... they all live down the street from me and we have known each other since kindergarten. During school I intelligently conversed with those 3 guys and my teachers... and I tried to be nice to anyone who was nice to me (nerds/loners included). Popular people were very cold towards me. I returned the favor.

This year, my senior year, things were different. Over the summer I ran into a few people in that popular circle at the mall, Starbucks, or the gym... and to my surprise, they were very friendly! One day, I was sitting in Starbucks studying for my SATs, when a girl whom I’d talked to maybe 30 minutes in my life said hi and gave a little wave. She is the 4th hottest girl in school, 2nd hottest girl in my grade. I said hi, stood up, and began to chat with her about senior year, college... simple stuff. She seemed to know a great deal about me, considering we hadn’t spoken much in the past? She sat and talked with me for a few minutes, very outgoing and friendly, until her friend who also goes to our school showed up. As soon as the other girl walked in the door, Cheryl became cold. Shortly after, she exited the conversation.

However! Two days later, again, studying in Starbucks... the best looking girl in school, Amy (9.2 real life, 9.6 high school), who I had never actually met... ran up and hit me in the arm! “Hey! What’s Up Anthony!” When I turned to see who was talking to me I expected ANYONE but her... after a moment of shock, I gathered my composure and began to talk with her about simple HS crap. It was quirky that she knew so much about me, even though we had never formally spoken before. After she finished her drink, we had been talking for 15 minutes and she said she should be going.

This phenomena continued with a few other girls over the course of the soccer season. Nothing overt, nothing in school, but every now and again out on the town, girls would be warm and friendly to me out of nowhere.

Then, with a forth of the school watching, I made an error during penalty kicks and my soccer team dropped out of sectionals. Instances like the above have seemed less frequent since then. But some have occurred.

I have talked to Amy once since she hit me... the day after a soccer game she told me I did a really great job, we chatted about college for 5 min, and I had to leave.

After our chat, and her friendliness... I made a gentleman’s bet with my 3 close friends that I would sleep with Amy by prom night (not necessarily on prom night). I have never lost a bet like this before. I would rather not start now. Hell... in all honesty... I have a crush on her. She is the best-looking girl in school, the 3rd smartest girl in school, and she has a great energy about her... she seems like she would be a lot of fun to spend time with.

Post Script:
I went from being a 14-year-old freshmen in high school to being a 15-year-old freshmen in college. In school and in groups, girls still give me the cold shoulder. But I can see that they are attracted to me whenever I find them 1 on 1. I am not sure how much about my life outside of high school these girls are aware of.

I missed out on high school... and damn it, I want a few months back! I want to date a girl from the popular, good-looking circle. I want to have a great time at prom. And while I’m at it... I want to win that bet!
 
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"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Eternal

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Go do the American Pie thing man...Fvck her brains out!

BTW: You got AIM?
 

misterethoughts

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Heyyy

Hey, whats upp... Intersting life story... You still the man... in my book... You got it all on lock... you will do fine with that 1000 aproaches.... mad respect...
 

Zaine

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How did you start taking college credit courses so soon?
 

Mr. Debonaire

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you seem to have yourself in an interesting predicament here.

from the sounds of things, your just far to mature for the high school scene. but then, if you were you wouldn't care about all this useless prom crap. trust me bud, prom isn't all its cracked up to be, so unless its really important to you i'd forget it

but wait! I'm forgetting the gentlemens bet!

I think in all honesty that you should just do what you do best. except with this girl, dont go for the number close. in my experience this doesn't really work in high school, because the target female automatically assumes that asking for her number means you want to "go steady" to use the ridiculously outdated term.

Play her up and leave at a high point, just generally raise her IL, try to get a little more friendly with the popular club, and then when the time is right, CONQUER!!!
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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TonyTheTigerOI

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A lot of people simply say... "Anthony, do what you do!"

It seems more complicated than that, to me. A few new tidbits of information:
-Amy has a Boyfriend of about a year. He is ugly, stupid, and popular
-I bumped into 3 of the popular girls in starbucks yesterday and one of them was pretty outgoing... I did my best to be friendly and open with all of them... Amy did a little "wave" when she said hi... she was noticably uncomfortable

Honestly, I know that if it was down to me, a girl, a cup of coffee and the right motivation there isnt a High School Girl in Buffalo who stands a chance. The problem is ISOLATING.

If I can extract one of the popular girls, take her on an amazing date, and REALLY kiss her... then Im sure the rest of the circle would open up to me. Then I could work on Amy.

Basically, how can I isolate a girl from a hostile group of fickle high schoolers?
 

I-am-someone

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Anthony, how about "sneaking around" with her?
I mean, having fun with her when nobody else is around, and make sure you both know neither of you should tell anyone? It adds excitement to the formula and keeps you relatively clear, yet able to achieve your goals.
 

Best friends? NAY

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If you have a few minuetes alone with her get the number (iF she doesn't give it then don't deal with this chick anymore) , set up a date then, you can be alone with her in public but not in school.
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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I dont ever have time alone with her? I have seen her a FEW times lately in public... with 3-5 of her friends. Im trendsetting... TONS of people from my school are hitting local coffee shops and teen clubs I have been frequenting for years.
 

WesCottII

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How bout the old

"Hey, can i borrow you for a second?"
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Mr. Debonaire

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Originally posted by TonyTheTigerOI
If I can extract one of the popular girls, take her on an amazing date, and REALLY kiss her... then Im sure the rest of the circle would open up to me. Then I could work on Amy.
one other little tip about the high school scene. dating a girls friends to get closer to her isn't necessarily a good plan. expecially if the group is really tight knit, when you drop that other girl for amy they will ALL turn on you. high school girls are all about drama (which is why i avoid them when possible :rolleyes: ) and if you try to get close by dating you way in, your going to find yourself on a whole new set of hit lists.

my advice, flirt with the other girls more then amy, especially if she knows shes hot. if you can get into their circle and still keep the c&f going with the whole group, her attraction will fall into place. you got the skills, the only thing that changes is the application,

go get em, tiger
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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Ok... after some thinking... I have sketched out a rough plan for retaking my HS life:

-Have my 3 close friends get my name aroun school, how it was when I first transfered. We go nuts on weekends, Ill ask that they find ways to spread the info around
-Do everything I can to indirectly bolster my "big bad wolf" rep
-In person, completely contradict my rep (with both words and actions)
-Isolate ANY popular girl and seduce... using an innocent deminor, light kino, and fun language - nothing DIRECTLY sexual.
*Should I kiss/date this popular girl? Or should I put HER in the friends zone? I am a GREAT kisser, this could definatly increase clandestine attraction girls in the popular circle have for me. Or, I could attempt to completely dispel my rep, confusing everyone*
-Isolate Amy and seduce... no holds bard... as soon as shes isolated she doesnt have a chance =)

Thoughts/comments/sugggestions?
 

undesputable

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This may sound absurd, but im going to suggest to make friends with all those jocks popular guys that you hate, but hang out with the group of girls you like. If you make friends with them, all the girls will open up to you as a group, instead of just 1 on 1.

I think that the reason the girls give you the cold shoulder whenever other people show up is bc they might know what your relationship with their guy friends is like. Im not saying go and become one of the those guys, but become friends with them, and when you get what you wanted you can do whatever you like.
 
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Your story is a lot like mine with the exception of going to college. I can relate to you pretty well but overall I have learned to adjust with what I got and just meet people as I go and I've met tons and tons of people and the girls are very responsive to me, especially 1 on 1 and I still ponder on why that is so! Overall to be happy in high school you just gotta do what the hell you want and don't worry, no one will have the balls to try and stop you.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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familyguyfan

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Be the guy that people go to to get alcohol. You've got the ID, and you've managed to get into bars, so get your friends to spread the word that you can buy not only beer, but liquor (generally harder to get since you can't just get it at any old grocery store where some dumb kid will sell you beer) with EASE. Although at first people may seem to use you, after you show them your good personality, etc. they'll warm up to you and actually start liking you more for who you are and not just what you have access to. And even if that doesn't happen for some reason, you still will gain a reputation, and the girls will notice you more.
 

Void

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this is old, prom is over.
 

comic_relief

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Originally posted by Void
this is old, prom is over.
I was wondering why this post talked about prom this early in the school year but then I looked at the date. Nice post none the less.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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