"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Problem with a girl I like...

Tails

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Hi, there's this girl I have met online. She is pretty, 17, doesn't drink or smoke and really nice. I just met her last night online... in the weirdest way. A guy she was seeing, not attached or anything, was talking to me before I met her. He told me about her and how he had sex with her, stuff like that. So after the following day, i was in a chat room and i saw her there chatting and i was being silly and typed to everyone about her and that guy that had sex... yes, that was rather dumb.

but anyway, she messaged me and started to try get info about who i was and how i knew. i told her the story of how he told me, she didn't like that... she told him about it and apparently she hates him for it now... she also told me that he left her alone in the bed for an hour and a half to go pick up his friends to go see some other girls. so i think that's enough reason to not like him. that was rather rude. i just wanted her to know about him and how he thinks of her... he does say he likes her, but if he really cared, why would he be telling me about them having sex? like she was some... object, a toy. i also think i could make her happy. even though i've only known her for one day, i wouldn't mind getting together with her, getting to know her more. i sure as hell know i'd do a much better job than that ass.

(by the way, he lives about an hour away, i live like ten minutes away from her. even less. she's also seen my pic, i seen hers.)

anyway, we forgot all about that, started chatting, getting to know each other over four/five hours online (MSN). i really enjoy chatting to her, i think she does too. i got her number and we text'ed each other just for fun.

when the guy returned home from out, they had a bit of a talk and he was trying to get her back and all... she kept pasting me everything he said and he was pissed off at me for telling. she said she didn't want me to get hurt or anything (i felt good about that). anyway, i sorted him out, he's fine about it now..

however, there is one thing that bothers me... she keeps on asking me about him, like if he's talked to me lately, or if she can read our conversations because she wants to see for her own eyes... i asked her if she still likes him, she said no. but just before, she asked me why i told everyone in the chat room about what they did together and why i didnt just tell her that he told me that they had sex. i told her i was just being silly and i was sorry. i then asked her if there was something she wanted to tell me... she asked what i meant by that, and i replied back with: "forgive me if im wrong, but you are asking about him alot."

she then said: "gotta go."

i told her to have fun at work and said bye.

she just went offline, that was it.

i also feel bad for interupting their small relationship (whatever it was) - yet, i also feel good because i got to know her more... i do like her. and dont worry, i'm playing the dj skillz, taking it easy, not being desperate... which he was last night... he was practically begging her back, i'd assume that turns her off, she pasted it all to me and laughed.

guys, what should i do about this? let her go and forget about it? does she still like that @sshole? help me out here ;/
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Tails

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no one replied :(
 

gav

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how do u know the guy she's seeing?

if i were u, i'd next her

she's probably only talking to u coz she's using u for information on this guy

and if u do steal the guy's chick, he'll go nuts
 

Tails

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i've known him for a bit on chat. but just recently we've talked alot more than usual and that is how he told me about that girl. i just think i could do better than him, that's all. i just don't know what her deal is. she seems to like me enough to of given out her number (which she didn't at first... my charm got around that - instead i gave her mine and she text'ed me, thus, giving me her number)

and she isn't seeing him anymore. she told him to piss off. she does not like him now.
 

Mr.Fortesque

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dude she is using U like her emotions tampon, U should next her and then stop talking on msm, try to go out with your friends and talk to girls face to face.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Tails

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why did she give me her number then? she almost didn't but i gave her mine instead, then she text me with her number there.

also. she and i have lots in common. she is really nice. we have great conversations... last night, the guy wanted to meet me so he could smash me or something. i told her and she got worried about me, telling me not to go. ahh fuk, i don't know what to think anymore.

this is pretty silly. but also.. she lives so close and she doesn't smoke or drink like me. we click really well! you know how hard it is to find girls like this?

maybe had you known the full story (which is in four hour logs from last night) you'd understand more ;/

maybe she really IS using me. it's hard to believe though.

but fuk it. i am not gonna let this get to me. i won't act desperate and call her or anything. i am a strong man. if she really wants to catch up, i told her to give me a buzz and she said she would. so there.
 

Maxtro

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Just meet her somewhere. Tell her you should meet up for coffee or something. If you want something to happen you can't keep talking only online or over the phone.
 

Mr.Fortesque

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I don't know all info, but if U think that her IL is so high, then ask her out first then U will see.
 

LouieVaton Don

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Yo even if you somehow get this girl, you wont get alot of mileage. Your an AFC dude, I don't care how many times you type your a man. Based upon your actions you have proved otherwise.


You hated on another guy who you called a friend because he didnt put this broad on a pedestal? No wonder shes still asking about him. Granted, he lives an hour away and that is grounds enough.....but you need to be more smooth man. I don't think this chick will respect you. Just my 2 cents.
 
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