"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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problem dont get eyed down at nightclubs????

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sportf190

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hey guys i am 18 years old and think im pretty good looking... i am a waitor and get many girls looks thorugh work and usually at the beach and such... but for some reason i cant get eyed down when dressed up at night clubs.. any one else expericance this or no the problem???
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Tom Juan

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No, I'm not a "waitor" nor have I ever experienced this problem.
 

Stoic_Mo

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You are probably too young looking.

And ignore "tom juan", hes just bitter from not getting any play in years.
 

Tom Juan

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Lol. Ok then, Mr. 3 posts.
 
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sportf190

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thats true the young thing may kill me and makes sense thanks for that one any other ideas
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Delta

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actually,

i encounter the very same issue - except i don't get it ANYWHERE.

i'm pretty certain you look far better than i do but i don't think i'm quasimodo. also end up dressing smartly, nice shoes, groomed, fit... but girls never look.

i live in l.a. if that makes a difference.

yah, if anyone has any insight into this particular issue, i'd be really interested in thoughts as well.

delta
 

Mission

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There is a fundamental difference between thinking you are dressing well, and actually dressing well.

Thinking you are dressing well is when you look in the mirror and say "damn I look good". Although I endorse this as a great sign of having high self esteem and confidence which I find to be very important, it really is only half of the equation.

Actually dressing well/looking good is when you go out, and multiple people will compliment you on it. It is when you go out to a party with friends, and your female friends are quick to mention how good you look.

Get it?

--Mission
 

Delta

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well, as for me, at most parties, i'm one of the best dressed guys in the place. and i get complimented for my duds at work all the time.

and beyond personal satisfaction upon evaluation and co-worker validation, i have a pretty keen aesthetic eye in general and it's getting honed constantly from gq, esquire even men's health.

never used to be into clothes but when i got into this pua kick, it's one of the areas that i studied with most interest. my strategy in learning ANY new subjects involves several months of magazine reading and 3 books from 3 different authors - and i did that.

must be a closet metro....

unfortunatelly, doesn't seem to be helping.

delta
 
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sportf190

Guest
thats true i think i focus too much on getting girls to look and all that... and pay to much attention to that and they probaley notice that.. that makes sense also.. its just i always have trouble at night clubs getting looks i dont know why i wud think girls are out there to look like us men instead of places like the mall, beach etc...
 

pooparu

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I think I know where you're coming from. Except here's my deal.

I get looks everywhere where there isn't a crowd. That's too say, on the street, buses, vacation (hotels, etc), church (yea I know I'm taking away attention from Jesus), basically anywhere where people aren't like in huge groups with each other. What does end up happening is that when I'm with my sister or cousin, or another female (I love pivots), I get a TON of looks from guys (Keep in mind though there are cultural difference, I'm black and alot of black guys just like to grill down), and GIRLS. When it doesn't work is if I'm just walking alone through an area thats crowded (foot ball games, some parties, etc), it's like its instantly turned off. I know its not that I'm ugly (not to sound arrogant, but a ton of girls have told my sister that I'm sexy, fine, whatever), and its not that I protrude the wrong body language, i think it's just that where you don't have social proof alot, people are busy living their lives. Think abuot it, girls might pay attention with you because you are with a girl, whether you are ugly or not, they just wanna see how good the girl you are with looks, then how good YOU look. I think that's really key, that if its a big place, you are just another face in the crowd, no matter how good you look if you have no social proof, high value friends, whatever. But when I'm with alot of friends and we are all dressed good, smell good, and we all are prettty attractive, then things become easier.

So I think it might just be a social proof thing really. I mean just make a test like I do, go outside onto a street and while you are walking see how many women notice you, if its anything like my test turns out, a ton will look, its just that when they are with their friends, ***** shields up, whatever, that your just another person, they don't think you are ugly, but don't KNOW that you're attractive until you stand out.

Just my experience
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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chickenlegs03

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Mission said:
There is a fundamental difference between thinking you are dressing well, and actually dressing well.

Thinking you are dressing well is when you look in the mirror and say "damn I look good". Although I endorse this as a great sign of having high self esteem and confidence which I find to be very important, it really is only half of the equation.

Actually dressing well/looking good is when you go out, and multiple people will compliment you on it. It is when you go out to a party with friends, and your female friends are quick to mention how good you look.

Get it?

--Mission
yeah, that, and when the girls you know ask YOU for style advice, like what would go with what...

...that's when i knew i dress well.
 
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sportf190

Guest
yah that sounds real true thanks alot man... i always thought at nightclubs the girls would look for hot guys and i thought it would be easier but i guess social proof and etc. is alot more important at those places.. thanks alot for clearing that up i thoguth my question was a bad one and no one would care
 

Delta

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hmmmm... social proof eh?

good theory. thanks.

delta
 

pooparu

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No problem man, no question is stupid (unless you just are trying to be stupid).

You'll learn alot of **** just from experience, trust me.
 
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