probably the wrong place for this question...

[garruk]

so im in an annoying situation here.

this girl that im friends with, JUST friends, shes not hot enough to pursue though i have hooked up with her once when i was super durnk a long time ago asked to borrow my car a few months ago. obvviously i said no, but becuase im an idiot i made up a lame excuse about why she couldnt and that ''next time" she would be able to.

so now periodically, maybe once every two weeks she has been calling me to borrow my car (we are both in college), each time i come up with an excuse but yet she still keeps calling/texing. and honestly its getting fkn ridiculously annoying. how do i tell this bit ch no without coming off as an *******?

honestly shes a cool person and i dont want to be a ****. now i do realize this is probably the wrong place to ask this question as being a **** is a heavily preached philosophy here (that i dont neccesarily disagree with).

but as members of a site that focuses on women, i figured most of you would have some idea of what to do or have been faced with a similar circumstance.

you think i could just ignore her texts and play dumb? ideas?

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

so now periodically, maybe once every two weeks she has been calling me to borrow my car (we are both in college), each time i come up with an excuse but yet she still keeps calling/texing. and honestly its getting fkn ridiculously annoying. how do i tell this bit ch no without coming off as an *******?

Come off as an *****. Learn a very valuable lesson about manipulation and go on.

You're being used and she doesn't even see it that way so don't bother calling her on it. Don't mention that. Whenever you let someone borrow or you do something the first time without getting at least the same value back, you're trapped.

Example: A girl walks up to you and says "buy me a drink". DON'T EVER DO IT BECAUSE HOW CAN YOU REFUSE FUTURE REQUESTS FOR THE SAME WITHOUT COMING OFF AS A ****. This is manipulation 101 and girls don't learn it in a bad way, they just get used to getting what they want often and do it reflexively.

You're being manipulated. You're being walked on with bootheels. Learn from it.

Turn it around and say stuff like "wow, you don't have any other friends with vehicles that trust you to borrow them?" and things like that and be a bit ****y. She'll stop if she always has to be reminded that she depends on you and it appears that no one thinks enough of her to help her out

You'll gain some respect if you stand up for yourself as not being convenient low/free-cost car rental service and she'll like you more.

Also, stop trying to justify and make excuses for her not to use the car. Turn it around in as many ways as you can think of and she'll be impressed.

 

[horaholic]

A really good excuse to tell her is that your insurance doesnt cover other drivers.

 

[mtlwlu]

+1 ^ best thing you can say.

 

[Frank_Tartaglia]

horaholic's excuse might be accurate. Most insurance plans don't cover other drivers unless you specifically put them on your plan.

 

[WaterTiger]

Tell her she can borrow it "If you fill it up with gas" It's not chumpish to lend things as long as you're getting some sort of compensation.

...or the insurance thing.

 

[garruk]

so i totally wrong, this really was a good place to post this question.

the wide variety of asnwers i got is pretty sweet.

watertiger- filling up the gas is a good idea, dont know why i never thought of it, i just dont know how i would suddenly bring it up after giving her so many excuses lol, but ill def file it for reference when the moment/opportunity strikes and it doesnt seem out of the blue.

mysterious guy- i do understand where you are coming from, and believe me when i say i never buy girls drinks at bars/clubs. but i do understand how your trying to draw a parallel from that into this. and you are somewhat right. I did set myself up for this, but im pretty sure she doesnt think lowly of me at all.

phat rabbit, i like your style the most but my only concern is that it would be weird to suddenly use random excuses after providing "legitiamate" ones for so long. in any case, i will try your mehtod on future instances if this happens with other girls.


in any case, i was beginnign to think that most ppl on this site were nothing but introverts/late-bloomers (lol) with very limited and controlled interactions with girls (just from reading the repetitive posts here and there) that were only applicable in chosen and controlled environments. im very VERY glad that you have all proved me wrong.

thanks alot guys