For the first time in my life, I have been able to achieve my personality goals on a sustained basis. Basically, these goals revolve around generally being comfortable and social around others.
In my opinion, the only way I can exude this charisma and confidence on a prolonged basis is if I abide by the following principle:
Behave in a manner that makes you proud of yourself.
The inner happiness that lets you be confident and comfortable comes naturally when you are living your life the way you want to be living it. The great thing about this principle is that it is completely self-determined. You decide what makes a "great guy" and then you get to live it.
Perhaps it consists of helping others for no reason. Maybe for you it's talking to people simply because they are other human beings, not because they are potential mates. If you live in a city, maybe the next time you see a homeless person, give them some change.
In my experience, when I'm feeling great about myself, I always have a "line" to feed to girls. I'm always in a talkative, social mood. On the other hand, when I've acted in a manner than is less than stellar, it makes me feel like less of a man. And people can detect this about you. No matter how you force a smile or feed lines, it won't work if you don't like yourself.
Now, the concrete tip. If there's one thing I find that works for me, just one thing, it's this:
Look people (even, or especially, strangers) in the eyes.
If you don't do this already, at first it may be awkward. But you'll get used to it. Eventually, you may become comfortable enough to crack a smile. After the smile may come a conversation. But the point is that it all starts with great eye contact.
My 2 cents. Hope somebody found this helpful.
In my opinion, the only way I can exude this charisma and confidence on a prolonged basis is if I abide by the following principle:
Behave in a manner that makes you proud of yourself.
The inner happiness that lets you be confident and comfortable comes naturally when you are living your life the way you want to be living it. The great thing about this principle is that it is completely self-determined. You decide what makes a "great guy" and then you get to live it.
Perhaps it consists of helping others for no reason. Maybe for you it's talking to people simply because they are other human beings, not because they are potential mates. If you live in a city, maybe the next time you see a homeless person, give them some change.
In my experience, when I'm feeling great about myself, I always have a "line" to feed to girls. I'm always in a talkative, social mood. On the other hand, when I've acted in a manner than is less than stellar, it makes me feel like less of a man. And people can detect this about you. No matter how you force a smile or feed lines, it won't work if you don't like yourself.
Now, the concrete tip. If there's one thing I find that works for me, just one thing, it's this:
Look people (even, or especially, strangers) in the eyes.
If you don't do this already, at first it may be awkward. But you'll get used to it. Eventually, you may become comfortable enough to crack a smile. After the smile may come a conversation. But the point is that it all starts with great eye contact.
My 2 cents. Hope somebody found this helpful.
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