"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Pregnancy scare/abortion
- Thread starter Qualtran
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
Abortion is an traumatic experience- so she'll never forget it and it will always linger in her mind. She may want to reevaluate the relationship with you - she may ask, "Would you marry me if I did decide to have the baby" or "Do you love me or are we just having sexual relations?"...right now in her mind she is thinking, "I wonder how he would be as a father?
She won't blame you if that is what you are thinking...she'll blame her carelessness! She'll take less risks from now on and she'll be more cautious.
She won't blame you if that is what you are thinking...she'll blame her carelessness! She'll take less risks from now on and she'll be more cautious.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
This is from my thread “Pregnancy Scare –YIKES!!!!”
I know you horny guys on this site had some pregnancy scares – so how about sharing this frightening scenario with us and tell us how you felt!
Here is my story…
I was 22 years old and a senior in college, circa 1984. This girl comes all the way from New Jersey and let’s me know she is on her way to my/her hometown. We meet, and she only has one thing on her mind and I have two things in my hands. We’re going at it and then she gets on top and I lose it right there – it wasn’t my longest or prettiest performance but the job gets done.
By the way, I never used condoms until the 1990’s – I know it was crazy, but for some reason I was extremely reckless back then and there was a lesser concern of diseases and AIDS was fresh on the scene.
It was summertime. Fast-forward four months to September. I haven’t seen this chick for a few months – she calls me and asks if she can come over. She is on my sofa and we are talking about nothing important, my room-mate is there and there is small talk and then she leaves.
I find out, her girlfriend/somebody tells me a few days later that this chick is pregnant – I PANIC!!! My heart starts pounding bad and I cannot study because no other thoughts will fit in my head! I start wondering to myself that this is why she came over, but was hesitant to tell me. My buddy starts mentioning that he noticed when she was sitting on the sofa that her stomach was fairly high and was protruding from the waistline of her pants, I told him that I noticed the exact same thing but it never occurred to me that she was pregnant!
I find out that the day I learned about it (a few days after she came over) that she was leaving back to her parents home in New Jersey the next day!! I told her friend that I needed to talk to her and I tried to contact her for a few hours but to no avail!! I was waiting for a phone call but it never came – I slept on the floor right next to the phone for a total of 11 minutes for the entire night. I kept going in and out of consciousness, and I didn’t know if all this was a dream or a reality nightmare!
Early in the morning the phone rings – I picked it up before the first ring left my ears – it was she! I quickly remark...
“I hear you’re pregnant?”
“You were going to leave town and not tell me?”
"Yeah I’m pregnant, but it’s not yours!"
“I was going to tell you when I came over to your place but I didn’t want to worry you.”
““How do you know it's not mine?”
“I am so many months pregnant and we did it after that, so it can’t be yours”…..
So I started to do the math and asked for more details – it was too close to call. I swear I banged her right when she came to town how could her “boyfriend” have gotten her pregnant (I believed he lived in my hometown) or maybe he lived in New Jersey. But I believed I asked that and she said that he lives in my town? I forget – it didn’t make sense – she’s from NJ and she just came to town, if she was pregnant from him before she came here then he must have lived there in NJ. She didn’t tell me about the boyfriend deal!!
“Don’t worry, it is not yours - you don’t have to take care of the baby, my boyfriend already knows, he is fine with it. I’m going back home blah blah blah . “
I’m relieved for the moment, but I am still nervous that I’ll get a call in the upcoming months to tell me a different story and it that it is mine after all – I was fearing it would come out looking like a Puerto Rican Lover without the mustache.
I left it alone, and that was that, I haven’t talked to her in 20 years – I may have a 19 year old child out there right now…maybe it is one of you guys here on this website and he is a desperately hopeless AFC and is seeking guidance in the ways of the world. Heck, I could be advising him right now without even knowing it.
The story is not over…the following summer someone comes running to the car with a picture in their hand and shows me Tammi’s baby. It’s a boy and he looks like a splitting image of a picture in my mother’s family photo album – he looked like my brother (I don’t have a baby pic of me at 5 months old); nonetheless, there is a family resemblance. I tried to hide my shock from my friends, I said, “I think that is how I looked when I was a baby!”
In deep contemplation, I wondered to myself, “I hope I don’t get that dreaded phone call……again”
I always thought that someone might show up at my door any day now and blurt out “hey dad, you up for a DNA test?” At 41, I would see it as a blessing to have a 19 year old child but I would always wonder what his life would have been like under my wing!
At 22, I would have been a nervous wreck to have a child, especially since I was not with this girl for more than one night – she was a high school friend that liked me but I didn’t get the hint until she started writing me letters from New Jersey!
At the age 41, it’s a whole different perspective!
I know some of you DJ’s had some pregnancy scares – so let’s hear them!!!
__________________
I know you horny guys on this site had some pregnancy scares – so how about sharing this frightening scenario with us and tell us how you felt!
Here is my story…
I was 22 years old and a senior in college, circa 1984. This girl comes all the way from New Jersey and let’s me know she is on her way to my/her hometown. We meet, and she only has one thing on her mind and I have two things in my hands. We’re going at it and then she gets on top and I lose it right there – it wasn’t my longest or prettiest performance but the job gets done.
By the way, I never used condoms until the 1990’s – I know it was crazy, but for some reason I was extremely reckless back then and there was a lesser concern of diseases and AIDS was fresh on the scene.
It was summertime. Fast-forward four months to September. I haven’t seen this chick for a few months – she calls me and asks if she can come over. She is on my sofa and we are talking about nothing important, my room-mate is there and there is small talk and then she leaves.
I find out, her girlfriend/somebody tells me a few days later that this chick is pregnant – I PANIC!!! My heart starts pounding bad and I cannot study because no other thoughts will fit in my head! I start wondering to myself that this is why she came over, but was hesitant to tell me. My buddy starts mentioning that he noticed when she was sitting on the sofa that her stomach was fairly high and was protruding from the waistline of her pants, I told him that I noticed the exact same thing but it never occurred to me that she was pregnant!
I find out that the day I learned about it (a few days after she came over) that she was leaving back to her parents home in New Jersey the next day!! I told her friend that I needed to talk to her and I tried to contact her for a few hours but to no avail!! I was waiting for a phone call but it never came – I slept on the floor right next to the phone for a total of 11 minutes for the entire night. I kept going in and out of consciousness, and I didn’t know if all this was a dream or a reality nightmare!
Early in the morning the phone rings – I picked it up before the first ring left my ears – it was she! I quickly remark...
“I hear you’re pregnant?”
“You were going to leave town and not tell me?”
"Yeah I’m pregnant, but it’s not yours!"
“I was going to tell you when I came over to your place but I didn’t want to worry you.”
““How do you know it's not mine?”
“I am so many months pregnant and we did it after that, so it can’t be yours”…..
So I started to do the math and asked for more details – it was too close to call. I swear I banged her right when she came to town how could her “boyfriend” have gotten her pregnant (I believed he lived in my hometown) or maybe he lived in New Jersey. But I believed I asked that and she said that he lives in my town? I forget – it didn’t make sense – she’s from NJ and she just came to town, if she was pregnant from him before she came here then he must have lived there in NJ. She didn’t tell me about the boyfriend deal!!
“Don’t worry, it is not yours - you don’t have to take care of the baby, my boyfriend already knows, he is fine with it. I’m going back home blah blah blah . “
I’m relieved for the moment, but I am still nervous that I’ll get a call in the upcoming months to tell me a different story and it that it is mine after all – I was fearing it would come out looking like a Puerto Rican Lover without the mustache.
I left it alone, and that was that, I haven’t talked to her in 20 years – I may have a 19 year old child out there right now…maybe it is one of you guys here on this website and he is a desperately hopeless AFC and is seeking guidance in the ways of the world. Heck, I could be advising him right now without even knowing it.
The story is not over…the following summer someone comes running to the car with a picture in their hand and shows me Tammi’s baby. It’s a boy and he looks like a splitting image of a picture in my mother’s family photo album – he looked like my brother (I don’t have a baby pic of me at 5 months old); nonetheless, there is a family resemblance. I tried to hide my shock from my friends, I said, “I think that is how I looked when I was a baby!”
In deep contemplation, I wondered to myself, “I hope I don’t get that dreaded phone call……again”
I always thought that someone might show up at my door any day now and blurt out “hey dad, you up for a DNA test?” At 41, I would see it as a blessing to have a 19 year old child but I would always wonder what his life would have been like under my wing!
At 22, I would have been a nervous wreck to have a child, especially since I was not with this girl for more than one night – she was a high school friend that liked me but I didn’t get the hint until she started writing me letters from New Jersey!
At the age 41, it’s a whole different perspective!
I know some of you DJ’s had some pregnancy scares – so let’s hear them!!!
__________________
toasttopper1879
Don Juan
You lot are bloody clueless about this pregnancy lark.Qualtran says the lass is only 7 days late.So what.7 weeks and I'd be worried but 7 days.Even if she is pregnant I dont think the home kits would show that early.
I've been there,been a teenage dad and looking back I wish it'd all been different.But it was nt,she was pregnant,too late to change it and 14 years later I'm now worried my daughter does'nt make the same bloody daft mistakes I made.
I've been there,been a teenage dad and looking back I wish it'd all been different.But it was nt,she was pregnant,too late to change it and 14 years later I'm now worried my daughter does'nt make the same bloody daft mistakes I made.
Damn PRL, you tell my story except my story had a damned bad ending, unlike yours.
LIT.. you are 100% on it
The rest of you fools listen or wind up giving some woman you hate $100,000 or more.
Think about it.. really think about it.
And thank God you have Dietzcoi and the others here to warn you.. who warned me in 1983? Nobody! I had damned AFC friends who led my down the garden path, the chump bastards!
Death to them all!
Dietzcoi
LIT.. you are 100% on it
The rest of you fools listen or wind up giving some woman you hate $100,000 or more.
Think about it.. really think about it.
And thank God you have Dietzcoi and the others here to warn you.. who warned me in 1983? Nobody! I had damned AFC friends who led my down the garden path, the chump bastards!
Death to them all!
Dietzcoi
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
This is bullshyt...you two had sex without using proper precautions, now you want to abort an innocent child? If you're not responsible enough to handle the consequences..quit having unprotected sex you idiot.Originally posted by dietzcoi
Damn PRL, you tell my story except my story had a damned bad ending, unlike yours.
LIT.. you are 100% on it
The rest of you fools listen or wind up giving some woman you hate $100,000 or more.
Think about it.. really think about it.
And thank God you have Dietzcoi and the others here to warn you.. who warned me in 1983? Nobody! I had damned AFC friends who led my down the garden path, the chump bastards!
Death to them all!
Dietzcoi
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
Dietzcoi, JPR is talking about Qualtran, and not you - your children were born!
Dietzcoi, you had hardships, I understaand, but appreciate the life you brought into this world, they just may be a light to shine in the darkness!! You may have created splendor in a drab dreary world!!!
Cherish your seed - they are a byproduct of your existence - they are worth something, no?? They are beyond monetary obligations!!
Dietzcoi, you had hardships, I understaand, but appreciate the life you brought into this world, they just may be a light to shine in the darkness!! You may have created splendor in a drab dreary world!!!
Cherish your seed - they are a byproduct of your existence - they are worth something, no?? They are beyond monetary obligations!!
You are right, PRL, as usual
I just need to get past the bitterness.. I feel it every 1st of the month when my pay is diverted to the ex!!!
These young bastards fight the truth and won't learn from those who have lived the nightmare.
Do you know how frustrating that is?
Dietzcoi
I just need to get past the bitterness.. I feel it every 1st of the month when my pay is diverted to the ex!!!
These young bastards fight the truth and won't learn from those who have lived the nightmare.
Do you know how frustrating that is?
Dietzcoi