Prayers

[spider_007]

FEMALE PRAYER
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "How big is my behind"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
Amen.
.
.
..
.

MALE PRAYER
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs
who owns a liquor store and a bass boat. This
doesn't rhyme and I don't give a ****.
Amen.

 

[bbestar]

What a self centered prayer you have conjured up here. A fake imitation of Psalm chapter 3 that refers to being dependend on God, not more independent like our selfish will.

 

[seanchai]

Originally posted by bbestar
What a self centered prayer you have conjured up here. A fake imitation of Psalm chapter 3 that refers to being dependend on God, not more independent like our selfish will.

Or you could read it as a joke. Last I checked, this forum wasn't known for its focus on prayer.

 

[Shiftkey]

Lighten up bbestar.

Very funny spider_007! Did you come up with it yourself?

 

[penkitten]

Originally posted by Shiftkey
Lighten up bbestar.

Very funny spider_007! Did you come up with it yourself?

no he didnt
i saw it in an email about six years ago

 

[OfficeSpace]

haha, I got a good laugh! lol

 

[spider_007]

Originally posted by penkitten
no he didnt
i saw it in an email about six years ago

i just got it now

damn i'm out of the loop

 

[Levex]

Amen indeed.

 

[penkitten]

Originally posted by spider_007
i just got it now

damn i'm out of the loop

in five or six years you will see it pass around again and it will give you another laugh.
seems like the really funny stuff always recirculates.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

I found a website talking about the lighter side of life a few years bcak about this. It was something to do with cheering up inmates within bleak walls

Know when to pray, know when to play

 

[Deep Dish]

bbestar
What a self centered prayer you have conjured up here. A fake imitation of Psalm chapter 3 that refers to being dependend on God, not more independent like our selfish will.

Blasphemy—isn’t it great? :woo:

 

[Don Ronny]

Originally posted by Deep Dish
Blasphemy—isn’t it great? :woo:

Indeed it is.

I'm gonna go pee on a church for kicks