"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Practice: Reframing

everywomanshero

Master Don Juan
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It's good to read and expand one's knowledge, but it's far better if one actually internalize what one is reading.

Here is some homework, and you can post your answers for review or examples for others. Reframe the following situations:

"Why are you wearing that <X>?"

"Is that your pickup line?"

"I'm not interested"

"Why are you talking to us?"

"Nice story, did you make that up on your way over?"

"I've heard this line before"

These are about the worst that will likely happen. Obviously if you get these often you might want to make sure that something else isn't wrong, however, the point of the exercise to show that even the worst thing you can imagine happening isn't really very bad and is in fact salvagable!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Sun Tzu

Don Juan
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everywomanshero said:
"I'm not interested"
"You're not interestING? I couldn't tell at first, but I'm beginning to see what you mean..."
 
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