Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
You're right man and I know it. I just don't know how to get to that for once.Being around the community for an year,having 188 post and not having kissed a girl? I'm sorry,but WTF?
What do you mean by loose? What would you suggest instead?Those goals are so loose it's a joke.
I agree with libertine, take some action mate
Doesn't matter. If you want to go from the beginning, go from the beginning. Week 3 is hard though, definitely destroyed me.Pozitron said:So start the bootcamp from the begining? You said follow up but I didn't go through it fully till now. Say just.. I didn't go through it.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Eliminate them from your life. Pozitron, for you, this forum has become the excuse to not take action. The forum is no longer helping you. Facebook is even more useless.Pozitron said:What's the solution? How can I not be dependant on this forum, on my notes, on advice or some random thing I get the feeling I miss out on if I don' read? How? How to be free?
This affected me for the past 2 years.
What can I do about it?
Thank you for this. We share the same view. If I live this way I am ready anytime and anywhere... as a man should be. I wanna be a man.. that's a fulltime thing.. not like I"m a man now but later I'm not. Thats the natural way and the way it should be, right?There's no secret man. You just gotta do it. There's nothing else that will change you. Once you get the momentum going, keep the persistence and do not ever stop. Take SOLID decisions and stick to them! Do them anyway, and stop reading. Do NOT wait for the opportunity to come. There's no right or wrong moment to do it. Do not wait to know everything. Naturals learned all by themselves, by trying. You can't become a breakdancer only by watching tutorial videos. There's no way you can do it perfectly on the first try. You'll hurt yourself several times before doing your trick right. Same goes for life.
That's my way of seeing things. It's up to you broooh.
Exactly.. I want to know all the answers before writing the exam. Oh, I have some moves you know.. like what I did witht his girl: We talked and stuff. My train came in the subway. I said just turned my back on her and made 3 steps then I went straight back, I said bye whyle kissing her on just one side then turned and never look back. I could tell she didn't expect that. There are some actually.. bt as I will get to the real stuff I am sure I will find things that work for me.Trust me man, I know that feeling, you want all the answers before you write the exam, if you look at my journal I also had the same problem but I have solved it by writing my personal book and observe what works for ME! maybe you could try that. Trully speaking, if it wasn't for my journal...I would have left this site, like Pook said "you'll never understand the principles of this site untill you leave it.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.