Post I made at loveshack.org

[comic_relief]

This is a post I made up at Loveshack.org and I wanted to post it here first and then over at Loveshack.org. This guy sent into this site the question "How to Get a Girlfriend - A Step-by-Step Guide" He was asking how and here is what I wrote to him.
_________________________________

This is my first post it is going to be giant.
I see some men here and i have decided to help

Before I start posting a few things to know "ATTRACTION IS NOT ABLE TO BE TAUGHT BY ANYTHING. IT JUST IS THERE OR IT IS NOT THERE."
Women are attracted to looks. That fallacy is pure and utter bull. Women look for a certain personality.

a little information about me before I start to tell you anything about me. I am a no-BS man and I will tell you exactly how it is. I am only 17 also. So lets get started

Here is some things that you might want to do.
1.) Don't come to this site anymore (e-mail me at [email protected] if you would like more information on where to go from there).
Reasons for this- Women are giving you advice on relationships- Big no-no - Women say one thing and do another like "Who do you want to go out with a Jerk or a Nice Guy?" Women say nice guy but go out with their jerk boyfriend.

Now to my list of how to get a girlfriend.

Before even going after a girl
a.) Don't even look for a girlfriend until you find a passion in your life.
Whether it be you job, a hobby, or something that keeps you busy. I can't say this enough "WOMEN HATE DESPARATION IN MEN" It is just that simple. Do not put them on a pedistal (later I will go over how to get them off that pedestal) Do not even go girl hunting until you have this. You will be pathetic and reek of desparation and the effect of this is that girls will run for the hills in the state you are in. YOU MUST be happy with where you are in life.

b.) confidence
You must have confidence. You are probably saying how do I get confidence. Well in order to get confidence you must conquer fears. Conquer one thing at a time. First off go with a little fear. then keep building by conquering other fears. You have alot like sky diving. Conquer it and you might just find it very fun. but the more fears you conquer the more confidence you gain. And yes WOMEN DO FIND CONFIDENCE SEXY!!!


2.) Wardrobe

Bad lustmonkey. Wears ratty t-shirts, doesnt have good taste in clothes. Rips holes etc. Never got a girl but good lustmonkey wears

a.) clothing
personally I think that you should dress in what you think is comforatable. I go with Khaki Pants and button up shirt. But that is just me and I get my clothes brand new for 25 cents
Do you think women will want to go out with a piece of crap in ratty jeans and a holey shirt. NO!!! First off, go shopping and ask the woman casheir, "I have a date tonight and I was wondering if you could help me pick out a couple sets of clothes that would make you want to rip these clothes off me and make out with me, right now." (don't laugh I have done it and they think it is cute)

b.) Hair
Get a gay hairdresser. Females make you look like a nice guy. Nice guys get no play too. Ask for the most common haircut among college guys

c.) Shoes
Have a very nice pair of shoes for just getting girls. I have my black dress shoes for this purpose.

d.) Accessories
Buy a nice watch over $100. possibly a mavado. It makes you look classy.


3.) The approach

Eye Contact and a friendly smile does wonders. you won't get anywhere without it. You will also be in the door.

a.)Fear
What is fear other than a four letter word. It is that gut feeling that you have when you are saying to yourself "man I want to go ask that girl out but what if she says no" In order to get rid of fear you must go right through it. Just go talk to that sweet looking girl. Think of it this way. If you go and talk to her and ask for her number and she says no you will have been rejected but wouldn't you rather know instead of already failing by just bailing on not even approaching. You will think about this night after night until you die and then you will look back on your life and say to yourself "Why did I not ever get a girlfriend" because you are a weak sack of crap that is taking up space you peice of shat. Get over that pointless emotion because once you do. You will start to take risks. Which will help you out much more in life than just getting girls.

b.) Conversation
The conversation should be no more than 5 to 10 minutes. You go with "Hi, I am LustMonkey and you are" while reaching out your hands for the handshake. Which puts in Kinostetics. Go on for there for a couple minutes and this will gauge her interest in you. (The convo should be 70% of the convo her 30% you) If she gives yes no answers, not very much. If she opens up with after you asking like sample convo:

bad lustmonkey
Me: "So where do you live."
Her:" I just came from Florida"
Me: "Me oh I live in PA. I love my cat. Blah Blah Blah"
...
Me: "Can I have your number please"
Her: "Umm... here is my number" She hands you a fake number and you both part ways.

good lustmonkey
Me: "So where do you live?"
Her: Well I moved here from Florida
Me: "What part of Florida"
Her: "Fort Lauderdale"
Me: "I have family down there and I go and visit every once and awhile"
Conversation continues
...
About to end convo
Me: So you seem very interesting. We should get together sometime. Whats your home phone number?" This question cuts through all of the childish games bullsh!t that women do to men because it is a direct question
Her: "Yeah just a minute" as she writes the number down.

b-1 Making connections
Making connections between you and herself. Like the sample convo up above. I made a connection on where she used to live. Just continue to demonstrate value.

b-2.) Kinestics=non-threatening touch
Personally I go with the handshake but there is another alternative, The hand kiss. Do a search on yahoo to find out about it.
1st, 2nd, 3rd dates go with kino in the hair, touching of the hands. Don't go overboard on this though (unless she wants to have sex then you will be touching alot more) because you could scare her. Just do it enough to show that you are a sexual being. That is not scared of having sex.
Romantic Kino anything else that might be done by couples usual hand holding etc.

Ok now you got a number and you are probably like "I got a number and going insane" what do I do. GET MORE NUMBERS!!! YOU FOOL!!! Yes you will get rejected(You will hurt after the first few times but after a while you will become impervious to that pain) but you will also get more chances to date women.

4.) Telephone Conversation

By now you should have 4 or 5 numbers. Call up the first one. Your call should be around 7-9 PM If she does not answer your call after your second call up there. She is not interested in you. Move on.

If she gives you a stupid excuse like
Her: "Hey it's lustmonkey"
Me: "How you doin"
Her: "Good"
Me: "I was thinking of taking you out this evening."
Her: "Not so good"
Me: "Oh whatever could be the reason"
Her: "My fish might be sick"

bad lustmonkey
Me: "Let me come over and nurse it back to health with you. I will put fishy medicine on it and nurse it back to health."
Her: "No"

Good Lustmonkey
Me: "well now, I hope you and your fish have a happy life together. Goodbye" even if she is trying to talk you into coming back and talking to her. She has low interest and will break your heart. End of story.

Continue seeing many different girls because you will show signs of desparate and needy person. If something bad happens with one you got another to fall back on.

telephone convos should only be 10 minutes or less. Top 20 minutes at the most.
If she gives an excuse for you like she doesn't like your date idea. Make a counteroffer.
sample convo. she must like your date ideas. If she does not accept the counter offer. Say when you are more reasonalbe. I will give you another call because she is an unreasonable beotch that you do not want to date.

For the date take her on an action date such as mini golfing, swimming, game of pool, parks, carnival, fair, bowling, theme parks, ice skating, boating, gym, go-karting, and you get the idea. take her out on an action date, not a movie/dinner date you boring old people. Use some imagination.

5.) The Date

Pre-date checklist
leave enough time to get ready
gas tank in the car is filled up
money
shower
shave
deoderent
cologne
trim your fingernails
clean your teeth
Take a condom with you If you pull everything off correctly you might just need it.

DO NOT BUY ANY FLOWERS OR GIFTS!!! It makes you look desparate and needy. You are trying to buy the relationship. Don't do it. Just bring yourself. She should be happy to just be with you. She should woo you, not the other way around.

You should then go to pick her up.

When you meet her at the place you both arranged to meet. Preferably her house. Always have a gameplan for the night. Never say to your date, "What do you want to do." Women want decisive men, not women who can't choose. You do the choosing, she follows. Remember that be a man not a girl or a nice guy but a man.

If she shows any disrestect to you about anything dump her a$$ because she ain't worth it

6.) After the date

Drive your date back to her place and walk her to the door to see if she wants to invite you in (condom might be needed there )

For the kiss, timing is everything. Just because it is socially acceptable doesn't mean that you must do it.
I go with the "Can I kiss you " method

Bad lustmonkey
Me: "Can I kiss you"
Her: after not enjoying the date because I took her to suckfest 2004 and a crappy dinner from McD.'s she says sure just to get rid of me. We kiss I never see the girl again.

 

[comic_relief]

Good Lustmonkey
Me: "Can I kiss you"
Her: After enjoying the date because I took her to bumper boats and mini golfing she says sure. If she does not invite me inside. she will say "Sure"
Me: "Great I will do that sometime" and start to walk away.
NOTE: I am not held responsible for what happens next
Her standing there wondering what just happened. She might chase you or something to get that kiss you but just walk away because she will wonder what just happened and about you. Now you got permission for when you can kiss her already. You call up and get another action date and act like nothing happened. When you feel the timing is best you kiss her without even asking just do it. You already have permission anyways.
You can only use this technique once on each girl because they will already know about it.

7.) Exclusiveness
She must say that she wants to become exclusive because then she really has interest in you and it is a way to gauge her interest in you. If you ask you will never know. Always the woman asks not you. Then it will become an Long term relationship
NOTE: DO NOT SAY I LOVE YOU TILL AT LEAST TWO MONTHS ARE UP BECAUSE WOMEN CAN CHANGE THERE MIND ON THE FLIP OF A DIME.

8.) marriage
Do not ask to become married until 6 months after becoming exclusive. I do not like marriage because it cages you and makes you miserable. Don't let that happen.

1.) Possible happening Breaking up
Do not be afraid to end it. If you are unhappy,

In conclusion some tips from this article and some things that I know to be true. Don't forget the basics of this post.
1.) Get rid of your fear of doing anything because fear is a stupid emotion
2.) Let the conversation flow and she does most of the talking.
3.) Don't forget "Whats your home phone number because if you don't you are still stuck with some experience on coversations
4.) Pick an action date
5.) She talks 70% you 30% (women love to flap their gums)
6.) be the man
7.) Any disrespect dump her because that is the harbringer of things to come.
8.) Have a good personality.
9.) She will set the pace of the relationship with regards to exclusivness
10.) If you choose the wrong mate you must end it and don't be afraid to end it either. Be a Man, not a pvssy.

_________________________________
Here is the original post. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t44293/

after being banned from that site . My posts were deleted and I was not allowed to post there anymore.

I know I have used a few pointers I got from this site but the overall theme was written by me

 

[jiza101]

good post.

 

[PeeGee]

It's a good post, but are you getting flamed to a crisp there? Lots of guys can't conceive of the things you speak of.

 

[comic_relief]

Originally posted by PeeGee
It's a good post, but are you getting flamed to a crisp there? Lots of guys can't conceive of the things you speak of.

suprisingly not,
they are now emailing me wanting more tips (I think I will send them to here to help them out because some of the men were whiners and complainers) because it was an "awesome" tip/post but it was moderated and deleted there. mods hated me over there and now over half of my posts were deleted including my marriage post(I was flamed by alot of people over there til it was deleted) think of the mature man's forumn with mostly dietzcoi and westcoaster postings (a little slimmed down) about how bad marriage is if you are not married to the perfect gal like Bungo Pony says he found.

Edit: I guess they deleted that post too but the original posters question is still there They just lost out on alot of good stuff. Oh well there lost. just like attention wh0re that did not want to go out with me

 

[DJ_Dork]

flowers and gifts do not make you look like a wussy. flowers once a month or gifts once a month does not hurt. just make sure it's inexpensive..but don't look at $$$ when it comes to celebrating her birthday (after you know her a good time) or anniversary.

 

[suga]

Hi,

I know you dont like taking advice from women on dating but I wanted to add my own little ol' advice regardless.

By the way Im 26 and was a dancer from my 19th Bday until I was 24, I am now pregnant and will not go back, it was to live on my own and pay for my own lifestyle, nothing about going to college since I have fed grants to help with that and a dad to help also.

But you are what 17?

Not to be rude but I would never go out with a 17 yr old, and your frame of mind is most definately competitive with those of other very young immature men/boys.

Your advice WILL work, most definately great advice for someone who only wants to get notches under their belt and work on social status.

For further tips on how to get a quantities of women, Google: mystery.

He is a man who was a late bloomer, frustrated he became a player using tactics to get multiple partners, or "concubines".

When I was younger these were the type of relationships I also chose, because I was also interested in my own self esteem, so I chose guys who were bad boys, players, etc.

How did this help my self esteem?

Well these guys were usually popular in social groups, they could get things such as drugs.

Now Im going to have a child, I do not want any of these people anywear near my child or future children, so my lifestyle option is taking a turn in the other direction.

Therefore I do not want a guy whos main benifit to me is getting drugs or entertaining, not that I am totally oposed to these things, its just that priorities are a main concern for me right now, my childs self esteem and well being can not come second to my own ego gratification and fun.

If I do get into another relationship it will be with a "nice guy".

Now to me after experiencing boys who are very focused on what how they look to others, my personal view of what "strength" is has become very different than that of when I was 17 yrs old.

To constantly choose social status over people who are TRUE to you, is by far a very undesirable weakness.

Only when you experience a superficial relationship can you really understand what I am saying.

I hope one day you relize that having someone you can trust is the most valuble thing that this world can offer, and I hope you relize this before its too late!

 

[comic_relief]

wow... I cannot believe that I wrote this a very long time ago. Parts of it i still agree with.

My thoughts have been so warped and changed that I cannot believe that I originally wrote this. It's like someone else entirely wrote this under my name, but I remember writing it.

My newer thoughts are much more coherent and more mature. Over three years of trial and error changes a person.

Then, I was just going for tail, but now I have had two serious relationships (a 1.5 years and my current is going strong at three months of being girlfriend/boyfriend).

I realize some advice is still good, but some won't even work anymore. It's interesting that I looked and saw this post. It makes me laugh.

comic_relief