Is it possible to change "who wears the pants" in a relationship? I've been in a relationship with this girl for about 2 months now and while I don't bend over backwards to do anything for her I know I'm not the one wearing the pants in the relationship. I definitely like her more than she likes me, and the cardinal rule of relationships says that that gives her all the power. What can I do about this? It sounds like oneitis, and I expect answers like "walk away", or "spin more plates" but I thought i'd ask. Thanks!
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Possible to change control of a relationship?
- Thread starter smoofle
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
sack up and start wearing the pants. Do what you want to do, if she doesnt like it, svcks for her. Take her in bed. Lead her around. Tell her no.
she will tell you she hates it, and get pissed off, but will secretly love it, as her pvssy will be dripping wet
she will tell you she hates it, and get pissed off, but will secretly love it, as her pvssy will be dripping wet
bukowski_merit
Master Don Juan
Yes, if you become more of a challenge to her - that will increase her attraction.
Can you personally do it? I don't know how skilled you are. You sound like you have "some" knowledge of relationship dynamics.
- Demonstrate higher value
- Make her jealous
- Don't take her sh!t tests serious (which will follow if you make her jealous)
- Put her to do things for you
- Spend less time with her
- Spend less time communicating with her (text/phone/facebook/etc)
- Spank her @ss
- Fvck her good
2 months is a VERY SHORT period of time for this type of stuff to be happening. If you're already feeling like the power struggle is going in her favor 2 months in - then you don't have much chance if you don't throw some daggers in boredom's eyes.
Can you personally do it? I don't know how skilled you are. You sound like you have "some" knowledge of relationship dynamics.
- Demonstrate higher value
- Make her jealous
- Don't take her sh!t tests serious (which will follow if you make her jealous)
- Put her to do things for you
- Spend less time with her
- Spend less time communicating with her (text/phone/facebook/etc)
- Spank her @ss
- Fvck her good
2 months is a VERY SHORT period of time for this type of stuff to be happening. If you're already feeling like the power struggle is going in her favor 2 months in - then you don't have much chance if you don't throw some daggers in boredom's eyes.
thanks for the responses!
@chromeo - i haven't had to do anything i hadn't wanted to do in the first place, not sure if that makes me even more AFC in the first place LOL (she hasn't been able to drag me to places i don't wanna go yet)
@bukowsi - i'm rarely serious with her, i'm always joking around so i don't take her **** tests seriously...though i do have troubles distinguishing any of them. i'll try to spend less time with her, but we're both in small town with the same group of friends and a very small pool of other people to hang out with lol.
@chromeo - i haven't had to do anything i hadn't wanted to do in the first place, not sure if that makes me even more AFC in the first place LOL (she hasn't been able to drag me to places i don't wanna go yet)
@bukowsi - i'm rarely serious with her, i'm always joking around so i don't take her **** tests seriously...though i do have troubles distinguishing any of them. i'll try to spend less time with her, but we're both in small town with the same group of friends and a very small pool of other people to hang out with lol.
IF you like her more than she likes you man, and doing things like spending less time with her, challenging her and having lots of sex etc to raise her IL will on the outside achieve that goal and possibly even change the power dynamic.
But how long can you maintain false control before your heart totally gives into her and you become attached to a woman who wont return the same care and affection you give her.
I have had three relationships so far, I am 24 and they have all lasted about a year and a half and what happens is that somewhere along the line I stop doing the things that I did which attracted the woman to me when I first met her.
The curse of the DJ knowledge is being able to get something then not being able to keep it.
It has to feel like you are doing nothing special and her IL is high this way you never have to act anything other than your true self and you can maintain the relationship and her attraction perpetually and not have it burn out.
But how long can you maintain false control before your heart totally gives into her and you become attached to a woman who wont return the same care and affection you give her.
I have had three relationships so far, I am 24 and they have all lasted about a year and a half and what happens is that somewhere along the line I stop doing the things that I did which attracted the woman to me when I first met her.
The curse of the DJ knowledge is being able to get something then not being able to keep it.
It has to feel like you are doing nothing special and her IL is high this way you never have to act anything other than your true self and you can maintain the relationship and her attraction perpetually and not have it burn out.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
isnt that a b!tch, feeling like your doing nothing and the womans IL is sky high....
thats how its supposed to be gentleman and the more you act with this demeanor the more it will happen and easier it will be for it to happen
thats how its supposed to be gentleman and the more you act with this demeanor the more it will happen and easier it will be for it to happen