"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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poor guy

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Robert28

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i saw this status on my facebook today and thought i'd share. read how rediculous this is! i think the guy dodged a bullet with this chick to be honest. she was "in a relationship" with him yesterday and today she's "single". i've known this girl for awhile and i have to admit, she's off her rocker. it's funny because she has many many flaws, is a single mom, divorced, and the list goes on and on. she's one of these girls that when she meets a guy she doesn't look for what's good in him, she looks for what's wrong with him...as if she's miss perfect. anyways here's the status.

"Ok ladies it's like this....It takes 3 months to decide he's your boyfriend. Change your status and it's all good....... But wait you see something that alarms you on his phone, do you pic it up and go through it????? Or do you ignore your gut??????"
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Robert28

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iliketennis said:
man i have no idea what you're even saying
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in other words it too her 3 months to even refer to him as her "boyfriend"....THREE MONTHS. they started dating yesterday(or so i'm guessing since she changed her relationship status). not even 24 hours later she's debating about going through his phone and must have acctually done it because now shes single.
 
SeymourCake

SeymourCake

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You don't mess with single mothers in the first place.
 
nismo-4

nismo-4

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From New Orleans, Louisiana to Atlanta, Georgia!!!
Single moms are to be sexed up. You're gonna run around trying to develop a relationship with one and get your feelings hurt.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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