Point of no return?

[Hyper2010]

Hi Guys,
Just a quick set of questions here I'd appreciate brutally honest advice on, because I can't get it anywhere else...

Had a major argument this morning with my GF of 9 months, over an ex FB rearing his head popping into the picture (they are chief bridesmaid and best man at a wedding Im not invited to) and at around 11:00am my GF says she can't handle it, accuses me of being insecure/paranoid etc...

Later on, as it was my day off I pop around her place at around 2:00pm to apologise for argument and for being pretty hot-headed, which I was. We talked/discussed the future etc for an hour, then ended up having sex and telling eachother we love eachother. She said everything would be alright.

My questions are;

A) - Do I need to worry about her banging this ex FB, as there will be tons of alcohol and I'm not there?
B) - Would a girl still sleep with me if she had lost all interest, or if todays argument had permenantly broken us?
C) - Im guessing not being so available for a while is a good option right now??

Any ideas??

Jason

 

[The Duke]

I think you acted like a insecure & irrational twhat muffin! I expect this kind of behavior from a woman, but not a man.

If a girl is going to cheat on you, there is nothing you can do to prevent it. However, if you pay attention and stay tuned into your relationship, you will see all of the signs that lead to it. Its best to just sit back, keep your mouth shut and eyes open until you have no doubt.

But you flew off the handle and acted like an insecure chump. Now if she is going to cheat she will be even more secretive about it.

 

[SgtSplacker]

If this was a private two person date I would say you are validated, right now you are just being a spaz.

It's a wedding, they are going to be around people id say it's reasonably safe. Just pay attention to what happens after the wedding is over, like where they went.

Her banging you does not mean she does not think you are a spaz, she may still think that.

There is no reason to ignore her, on the contrary how can you know what's going on if you are butthurt trying to distance yourself from your girl?

Get in there, stay in there, let her attend her event. Stop feeding your emotions, but rather pay attention to logic. If you find evidence or real things that actually point to her being unfaithful then you have every reason to suspect something. But if you have nothing to go on, you are only making it more difficult for you to gather information. Get it? Be cool, and listen to what she tells you. All your doing is letting her know you are very suspicious of her so she is going to hide things from you to try and manage your reactions.

As far as the wedding goes if you don't know the groom for more than a couple months you have no business being there. Don't sweat the fact you were not invited. If you do know him, something smells rotten...

 

[HalfPUAHalfAFC]

First, yes, you should not have flown off the handle. Sometimes it works, but probably not this, since you've been whining about the situation prior to the blow it. It makes you look insecure.

But there's something you are not telling us.

Why are you not invited to the wedding?

Usually, invitees are told they can bring guests.

If your GF is a bridesmaid, the typical courtesy is for the bride to tell her she can bring a guest. What, did the bride tell everyone, no boyfriends?

So, if your girlfriend CAN bring a guest and has not asked you to come along, there's a reason for that.

Further, a decent gf would bring you along regardless.

In any case, I don't want to make you more paranoid than you already are, but I would suspect she was planning on banging either her ex there or picking up someone else.

I cannot imagine having a gf that did not ask me to come to a wedding with her.

Something not right here.

 

[Exoduso]

First, yes, you should not have flown off the handle. Sometimes it works, but probably not this, since you've been whining about the situation prior to the blow it. It makes you look insecure.

But there's something you are not telling us.

Why are you not invited to the wedding?

Usually, invitees are told they can bring guests.

If your GF is a bridesmaid, the typical courtesy is for the bride to tell her she can bring a guest. What, did the bride tell everyone, no boyfriends?

So, if your girlfriend CAN bring a guest and has not asked you to come along, there's a reason for that.

Further, a decent gf would bring you along regardless.

In any case, I don't want to make you more paranoid than you already are, but I would suspect she was planning on banging either her ex there or picking up someone else.

I cannot imagine having a gf that did not ask me to come to a wedding with her.

Something not right here.

If he doesn't know the bride or the groom, does he really have any business being there in the first place though? Yeah she could have invited them out of courtesy, but there could be a million reasons as to why she didn't. 99% of them do not point to her wanting to bang her ex.. now you are being just as paranoid as the OP is.

 

[Hyper2010]

reply

Cheers for the advice

So probably stop behaving like a paranoid teenager and start behaving like a mature grown up

 

[Hyper2010]

She has also said that as I'm not going, I could wait at her place until after it is over. So I'll be there when she comes home

 

[Exoduso]

Cheers for the advice

So probably stop behaving like a paranoid teenager and start behaving like a mature grown up

Pretty much.
Like others here have said, if she wants to cheat on you she will... and you can't do anything about that.
If you're in a relationship with her, you have to trust her until she gives you a valid reason to not trust her, or loses that trust by doing something stupid.
Right now she hasn't done anything, and you've practically acted like a little paranoid girl.
My last ex freaked out every time me and my ex were in the same place, even though the only reason we were was because we dated for many years and had a lot of mutual friends. She wasn't able to handle that and it was a major turn off that she didn't trust me. What you want to remember is that she is dating you, not him, and so when you're being insecure like this you're only turning her off.
As for point of no return? I think you're being a bit too dramatic. Just stop being paranoid and insecure and start being confident in yourself and in your relationship, and stupid **** like this won't bother you anymore. If you will be confident enough in yourself, you will have no doubt that a gf will cheat on you just because she runs into an ex bf of hers.