"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Please help i think my girl is cheating on me

JohnBeck

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Hey guys, i don't know if this is the right forum for this. I really don't know what to do and i feel terrible, hope you can help me out.

Yesterday my bestfriend called me on the phone asking to come over to his place, he sounded serious. We sat down and he was like i'm very sorry man but i am just going to give it to you straight, i saw Anita the other night and she was hooking up with some guy kissing flirting and i think he took her home.I told him i can't believe it but he said he was sure, could he just be joking??? Friends do that right..

Anita was at her parents place and got home this morning. I did not talk to her about it but she would not even give me a kiss because she was busy, she asked me why i was doing so wierd but i said i was feeling sick. Right now she is at the shopping mall with her friend. I am afraid to ask her maybe if it is not true she will get mad at me for asking, what should i do i never felt so bad?? :crazy:
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Chickfight

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No, only an enemy would lie to you like that. There's little doubt she's cheating on you. Just end it and move on. If you want to confront her just tell her what your friend told you and her reaction should be enough evidence.
 

TheMonkeyKing

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Responses in bold....

JohnBeck said:
Hey guys, i don't know if this is the right forum for this. I really don't know what to do and i feel terrible, hope you can help me out.

Yesterday my bestfriend called me on the phone asking to come over to his place, he sounded serious. We sat down and he was like i'm very sorry man but i am just going to give it to you straight, i saw Anita the other night and she was hooking up with some guy kissing flirting and i think he took her home.I told him i can't believe it but he said he was sure, could he just be joking??? Friends do that right..

Doesn't sound much like a joke.

Anita was at her parents place and got home this morning.
Was she at 'her parents', or another house...?

I did not talk to her about it but she would not even give me a kiss because she was busy,
She wasn't busy, she was avoiding you and therefore the situation. If she wouldn't kiss you, she's definitely cheating. It makes her feel cheap if she's kissing more than one guy at once - even though she theoretically is anyway.

she asked me why i was doing so wierd but i said i was feeling sick. Right now she is at the shopping mall with her friend.
Is she definitely at the mall....? Or is she somewhere else?

I am afraid to ask her maybe if it is not true she will get mad at me for asking, what should i do i never felt so bad??
Confront her. What's the worst that can happen? You'll be able to tell if she lies or not, right. If she admits it. Tell her to leave and then come back here and we'll help you re-start your life.

:crazy:
The combination of your friend's report and her subsequent behaviour does not bode well.
 

fuko2007

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I dont think your buddy was joking with you on this. I have a saying. If it walks like a duck , looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck odds are its a duck.
Drop her like a used condom on a dirt road man. Sorry this happened to you.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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expos

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Sorry that this happened. This really REALLY sucks.

I completely understand, this happens to a lot of us. In fact, a lot of guys find this site because their woman was acting up. A woman's emotions change like the wind and you'd be surprised at how many women in long term relationships and in marriages actually cheat. I find that half the women I meet are shady as hell.

The best way to deal with it is confront her like a man and demand an answer. You deserve at least this much for her. If she admits to it, then you drop her completely. Remove from Facebook, delete her number, etc. No contact, don't return her calls or texts. Just walk away - this is how you get your revenge - buy not giving a FVCK.

Completely rid yourself of this lousy, untrustworthy b!tch.
 

JohnBeck

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Deep down i know it is true.. I am really mad at her but at the same time i don't want to lose her it hurt so ****ing much.. I am really terrified to talk her about it :(
 

Love<3

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First of all, I am very, very sorry that your gf did that....I understand that must be hurtful. But let me give u an advise. Please don't ask men on here... They have double standards. They give each other advises on how they should have affairs and cheat their gf/wife.... But if a girl does it, they get mad

This site is horrible! Run before they brainwash u!! Plz leave!
 

Dreesy

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Sounds like you have a good friend there. I know a lot of guys who would have just passively kept that information to themselves.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

JohnBeck

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Guys, i have not told her yet. She is back with her friend from the shoppingmall and they having like a girlsnight downstairs with wine. I am upstairs at my computer typing this.. I'm feeling really bad to be really honest i am actually crying about this ****... right now i feel like the most embarresed ever. If i walk down there or they call me downstairs i can't go because they will see my teared up eyes. this situations suck i feel ****ing embarresed about this
 

Igetit!

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JohnBeck said:
I did not talk to her about it but she would not even give me a kiss because she was busy....

Ohhh sh!t.... :eek:

The moment a chick starts mentioning "time" or a lack of it as excuse for not showing you affection/intimacy,you got a problem my friend.


"Too busy" to give you a kiss? Heh....well that's a new one.

Just please don't say you two were standing face to face talking to each other when she said that to you and you ACTUALLY BELIEVED dat' sh1t,cause that would be hilarious......
 

JohnBeck

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Igetit! said:
Ohhh sh!t.... :eek:

The moment a chick starts mentioning "time" or a lack of it as excuse for not showing you affection/intimacy,you got a problem my friend.


"Too busy" to give you a kiss? Heh....well that's a new one.

Just please don't say you two were standing face to face talking to each other when she said that to you and you ACTUALLY BELIEVED dat' sh1t,cause that would be hilarious......
She was prepairing food in the kitchen and i got up close to her side and she did not take trouble to turn the head to give a kiss while i was to lean into her
 

fuko2007

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JohnBeck said:
She was prepairing food in the kitchen and i got up close to her side and she did not take trouble to turn the head to give a kiss while i was to lean into her
She is distancing herself emotionally and physically man. We call this the detachment phase right before she dumps you. It makes it easier on her. Do a preemptive strike and drop her now.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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jurry

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JohnBeck said:
She was prepairing food in the kitchen and i got up close to her side and she did not take trouble to turn the head to give a kiss while i was to lean into her
You're a weak domesticated cuckold. Now accept it or leave her.

The rest is just useless whining and feeling bad for yourself.

Grow up.
 

Between_The_Lines

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You remember those viral videos of people trying to take down a spoonful of cinnamon? Sticking around in the relationship without addressing your suspicion will be a lot like that - it will come out eventually, much sooner than later, and abruptly. Or she dumps you and you get double the dose of humiliation. Or you can calmly end it without a confrontation of any sort, without having her openly admit if she did cheat and without digging up any gut-wrenching details if, like you said, "deep down (you) know it's true". Your call.
 

expos

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Love<3 said:
First of all, I am very, very sorry that your gf did that....I understand that must be hurtful. But let me give u an advise. Please don't ask men on here... They have double standards. They give each other advises on how they should have affairs and cheat their gf/wife.... But if a girl does it, they get mad

This site is horrible! Run before they brainwash u!! Plz leave!
Get lost, B!tch.

We never, ever advise having affairs and cheating on our wives and girlfriends, only pathetic men do that.

We advise that a man date several women and to not commit until we find someone who is right for us. Once we commit, it's a "girlfriend" than possibly a "wife" who we should never cheat on.

Go back to Loveshack.
 

Yorkex

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I know you are cheating , let's just end this now.

" How do you know ?"

Same way you didn't care about me enough to admit that you are having an affair, the same way it's NONE of your BUSINESS how I found out. You have 7 days to get out or I will take legal action.
 

zorg198

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Dude,

Stop wasting time! just end it and move on. its hard but at least you will have your dignity. she's about to dump your @ss soon.

Joe.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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