Please help. I have scared any women I have ever liked away.

[Rizilki]

How can I fix this this?

Every girl I really like ends up just brushing me off or telling me no we should just be friends. It's either that or I get cues leading me
To the conclusion that she doesn't feel the same about me. I know the problem is in mindset and attitude. However apparently I cannot address the issue. I feel as if any girl that I like doesn't like me
Or any girl that likes me I sure as heck am not attracted to. It has to be mindset but how do I fix this?

To be honest and as least ****y as possible I have very attractive attributes. What I do who I am and what I look like seem very impressive. However it is the mindset, at least I believe.

Ex.I have been crushing on this I met in cross country for the past two months. Just recently I have been trying to get closer to her, but she has been sending me signals that show no interest. She pretty much treats me the same as all the other guys on the team. She is a veryfriendly person, she is Mormon has very high moral standards. Now I would think that she would be attracted to the guy who also worhips the lord(no I don't worhsipfor her) and who has a level head on his shoulder, however instead I was told by one of her close friends that she was crushing on a guy that drinks/parties etc etc however he didn't feel the same way, he just wanted a one night stand. I have no idea why she was attracted to that being the person she is. (they ended up never seeing each other mutual hate).

Please throw me
Some advice help me use what I got

 

[Rizilki]

By the way some things about me.

20
Fr Nursing Major
68W-Medic
Cross-Country runner(biggest guy on team 180)
Fast and strong
Wise
Adaptable(mostly haha)

That's most of it. Oh ya I am 6'

 

[loveshogun]

However apparently I cannot address the issue.

If that's what you think, then you can't address the issue. Fix that. Stop thinking you can't better yourself.

Furthermore, if you do decide to better yourself, I hope you realize that being yourself and being happy is the benefit, the prize, and that women are just a bonus.

You're young. Keep running. Focus on your studies. Stop letting women throw you off your life path.

Because of who you are, more women will tend to be attracted to you if you are in fact athletic, laid back, and have positive things going on in your life. But that DOESN'T mean that women are obligated to like you. You will need to start talking to lots of girl and stop getting hung up by rejection. If a girl doesn't like you, she doesn't. This is not the worst that can happen to you, so don't act like it is. If you have to, go meet some Somalian kids, and ask them what a "bad day" is like.

If you stutter, take speech classes. If you get nervous easily, take up improv or comedy. Finally, be up front about what you want. If you wanna take a girl out, ask her out. Don't try to weasel your way into someone's life to try to sneak something out of them.

Use direct, simple routes to reach your goals, and you'll find that most complications only arise because we create them.

 

[john_trenor]

Like you said she had a crush on some guy that wasn’t anywhere close to being morally equivalent to her. Remember that opposites attract. We have to be respectful towards others beliefs but you don’t have to be the male version of her. I found that in most situations people with different interests and beliefs have a grater chance of being attracted to each other. The way it works is that both of them can learn something new and unexplored about each other and that’s what makes things interesting. Later of course you have to establish some kind of court ship, but that comes later.

Just be your self and try talking to her more often. Use small talk but gradually become interested in what she's about. This will give you some insight on how to draw her attention towards yourself. Also it will give her the notion of you being interested in her. Women love to be heard. After that it’s smooth sailing. Good luck and stay well

 

[mikeyb]

Get some kino in there!! Start easy with a high five or something and escalate slowly. Bust on her if she's lagging behind, surely in training you have every imaginable chance to do C&F. And pay the other girls on the team some attention too.

Do you know why she went for that other guy? Attraction. Value. She was attracted to the "bad boy" image he projected and he pushed her away after getting her interested for the purpose of his one night stand. Women value more what they can't have, hence she values him more as a result. Next time use it to your advantage: if she's used to receiving attention from you be distant one day and she'll be wondering why you're not there boosting her ego.

Finally, no matter if she's mormon or whatever, you still need to be flirty/sexual with her. It can be as subtle as you want but I'll bet it's a lack of flirting that puts you in the friendzone.

 

[Rizilki]

Thank you I will use this advice.