"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Play hard to get vs spontaneity.

Aiken_Drum

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Hi guys,

I'm having doubts about how to handle this.

Let's say you just started dating a girl, right? You should try to limit messaging, so that you show that have a life (MUCH better to actually HAVE a life besides her, of course :D ).
But, on the other hand, let's say you feel the need to talk to her. Isn't it worse to repress that? Because, you are not doing what you want.
I mean, let's say the standard says "contact her every 2 to 4 days". But what if you want to share something with her with a quick SMS a little earlier? Or calling her because you thought about her and something you both did and wanted to have a quick chat about that?

I'm asking because I'm usually a little uptight and structured about this, and on the other hand, know a natural, who's a friend of mine, who calls his girls "Honey", "My love", etc etc etc. And he's currently dating 4 girls, so he IS getting some. He's very spontaneous, sometimes I'm not and end up repressing this kind of comments for fear of coming to strong. But it does not make me too happy :( . At the beginning of dating a girl, I always feel too rigid and that ****s up my enjoyment.

Sorry for the confusing post, I'm very confused by this myself, so any help clarifying this whole ordeal would be greatly appreciated.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Da Realist

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 1, 2005
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Memphis, TN
Do whatever you feel like doing: just don't get mushy about it. The ting to do is just have fun about it and they will fall for you.
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
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You sound like you care too much. Care less.

Sometimes you should start up the convo and show affection with cute names and compliments. Sometimes i just feel in the mood to do that, and they respond well to it. But also sometimes its important to not reply or not contact for a few days.
 
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