Pissed off husband from private flirting on Facebook.

[rhinostarr]

K guys, here's the deal...I am 49 years old

Got this cute facebook friend. She lives in the next town over, but I never met her personally. Frankly, I can't even remember how she became a facebook friend.

One day last week, she starts posting hot pictures of herself. No body shots, just her sexy face.

I am intrigued. I Private Message her, give her a flirty comment about her pictures. She responds with "Lol"! and the flirtations take off from there. We flirted on and off throughout the day. She responded with fairly long messages, laughing, calling my comments, "funny" and "awesome", saying that she liked guys with a little grey in their goatee like me, ect, ect.


During the course of the messaging, I find out she's in her thirties, currently married, and this is her third marriage. I made no negative comments about her husband, but I admit
when I found out she was married three times and was responding to my messages, I kept going...I NEVER SAID ANYTHING SEXUAL. NEVER GOT AROUND TO ASKING FOR HER CELL. AND NEVER SUGGESTED WE MEET UP.

So the next morning I wake up, look, and notice her Facebook page has been completely taken down. And a simple message from a guy with the same last name, her husband saying. "You and I have something to talk about. See you soon."

Well, quite frankly, the woman was a fun flirtation, but I'm not in love or anything, and I am a little too old to care about fighting some guy over his woman, so I messaged him back an apology for flirting with his wife.

He messaged me back saying, "Apology not accepted. Like I said, I will be seeing you soon."

Any suggestions on how I can diffuse this situation?

 

[( . )( . )]

Betas gonna beta.

It's true these losers can sometimes be quite dangerous when they snap, most of the time they are kittens though. Personally I would never have apologized. Her inability to long term pair bond and then him getting angry and threatening YOU over it would have pissed me off, I probably would have let him know it and I most certainly wouldn't have gone on the defensive. Just gives these mewling ****s fake courage.

 

[RecoveringAFC]

I went through something similar awhile back. The guy was a psycho, compelete with documented criminal record. In the end nothing came of it, just a lot of hot air.

 

[AmIAFC]

How would he have been able to find you in the first place, despite the fact they live in the next town over?

Let me guess, you told her where you lived/worked.

 

[rhinostarr]

AMIAFC. never told her where I live, but my city and my work phone number is on my FB page.

 

[Warrior74]

Here's the thing. I'm a douchebag and I know it. I've dudes call me about their girl or show up and confront me about their girl talking to me and I usually reply with this?

You mad bro? You mad at me? Be mad at your girl, she's the one in the relationship with you. She didn't even mention you, why do you think that is? I never heard of you until now. Your girl's no good, I don't want nothing to do with her. Both of yall leave me alone. Too much drama.


I've had one guy try to fight me in a bar. But online or over the phone, I never hear from the guy again. Mind you this has only happened to me 4 times in my life.

 

[Atom Smasher]

The solution is to buy a time machine, turn back the clock a few days and understand that there are always consequences to dealing with married women.

That doesn't help you, but perhaps it will make other readers think next time the temptation rolls around.

 

[5string]

The solution is to buy a time machine, turn back the clock a few days and understand that there are always consequences to dealing with married women.

That doesn't help you, but perhaps it will make other readers think next time the temptation rolls around.

This^^^^^^!!!!!

Weird thing is, he should be angry at her, not you.

 

[rhinostarr]

Well, ok, I admit I was thinking with my little head, and not my big one. Fact is, she is cute and sexy, but NOT that cute and sexy...maybe it was a little bit of being bored at work that day, the enjoyment of spitting game, ect, ect...when she told me she was married three times, plus she wasn't rebuffing me at all, I was really just having a good time flirting with a hot woman...will I be more cautious with a married woman next time? Of course

But now that the damage is done, what do you think? Should I ignore him? Challenge him and turn it in to a silly HIGH NOON< OK CORAL situation, what?

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Mind you this has only happened to me 4 times in my life.

lol

 

[AmIAFC]

Well, ok, I admit I was thinking with my little head, and not my big one. Fact is, she is cute and sexy, but NOT that cute and sexy...maybe it was a little bit of being bored at work that day, the enjoyment of spitting game, ect, ect...when she told me she was married three times, plus she wasn't rebuffing me at all, I was really just having a good time flirting with a hot woman...will I be more cautious with a married woman next time? Of course

But now that the damage is done, what do you think? Should I ignore him? Challenge him and turn it in to a silly HIGH NOON< OK CORAL situation, what?

Please ignore him. So what if he's pissed and has threatened you -- he's her husband. In the end, just ask yourself what exactly is it you'd be fighting for and if it's worth it in the long run?

 

[ThunderMaverick]

@AmIAFC, when are we going to see an update on your thread?

 

[Naughty Ninja]

K guys, here's the deal...I am 49 years old

Got this cute facebook friend. She lives in the next town over, but I never met her personally. Frankly, I can't even remember how she became a facebook friend.

One day last week, she starts posting hot pictures of herself. No body shots, just her sexy face.

I am intrigued. I Private Message her, give her a flirty comment about her pictures. She responds with "Lol"! and the flirtations take off from there. We flirted on and off throughout the day. She responded with fairly long messages, laughing, calling my comments, "funny" and "awesome", saying that she liked guys with a little grey in their goatee like me, ect, ect.


During the course of the messaging, I find out she's in her thirties, currently married, and this is her third marriage. I made no negative comments about her husband, but I admit
when I found out she was married three times and was responding to my messages, I kept going...I NEVER SAID ANYTHING SEXUAL. NEVER GOT AROUND TO ASKING FOR HER CELL. AND NEVER SUGGESTED WE MEET UP.

So the next morning I wake up, look, and notice her Facebook page has been completely taken down. And a simple message from a guy with the same last name, her husband saying. "You and I have something to talk about. See you soon."

Well, quite frankly, the woman was a fun flirtation, but I'm not in love or anything, and I am a little too old to care about fighting some guy over his woman, so I messaged him back an apology for flirting with his wife.

He messaged me back saying, "Apology not accepted. Like I said, I will be seeing you soon."

Any suggestions on how I can diffuse this situation?

LMFAO @ the "49 y.o." who "doesn't know what to do" so he "finds" SS's mature man forum to "advise" him on something that any sane rational person would just ignore and keep the evidence of subtle threats.

I'm sure our O.P. will be shortly leaking "updated new details" to string a few readers along.

Cool story anyway bro! Trollololol

 

[origin138]

Any suggestions on how I can diffuse this situation?

The situation is already diffused. He won't do anything. Most dudes that WOULD do something about it wouldn't talk about it, they would just pull the trigger, not send out veiled threats over FB keeping you in the lurch about something ominous.

My advice, relax and don't apologize for his girl's slvtty ways. Apologizing for something you owe no apology for conveys weakness, and it also conveys that his tactics got the better of you.

I had a similar situation happen a few months ago. This woman was all over me at a party, talking about how she was single and found me drop dead attractive. So, we started kissing. I didn't know her beta BF was in the back yard seeing this all happen. The dude came in and raged at me tossing out one threat after another. Instead of backing off and apologizing, I made steely eye contact and explained to him what a slvt his GF is that she would disrespect her man like that in public, and asked him what kind of a man let's his GF behave like that in public and then blames other people? As hostile and angry as he was, he couldn't deny the truth. He said "You're right, this isn't the first time she's done this."

Chances are this guy knows what a cow his GF is. I wouldn't worry too much about it. He was acting in the moment. Keep your shotgun by your bed in case I'm wrong though

 

[Warrior74]

lol

I was hoping someone would catch that. In my case these were women who I had no idea were married or dating someone. They never told me. Actual married women, I leave the hell alone, if they are social friends and I know their husband I'll speak and be polite but I go out of my way to never seem inappropriate.

 

[MaddXMan]

The husband is not going to do anything, just brush it off. He probably sent that same message to all the other guys she was chatting up. Don't think you were the only one.

 

[the_stig]

First rule of kicking someones ass is you DONT tell them you are going to kick their ass, you just DO it. Making threats is the equivalent of wild animals posturing and puffing up their chests to scare away the other guy. If he wanted to kick your ass, he would, but he's taking the easy way just hoping to rattle your cage.

Besides.. his threats are on public record, published for the courts and police to see. If he followed through he would be the stupidest mother****er alive.

Tell him you aren't a fag like him and to get his rocks off on some other guy. His life is probably so boring this is how he gets attention, provoking others to get a rise out of them.

 

[Down Low]

Definite troll thread.

Husband has every right to stomp any man who flirts with his wife, and leave him for dead. Troll and every other man knows that already. It's always the man's fault; all women are weak-minded and amoral.

Husband wifed up a two-time loser. Gets what he deserves. She's not worth fighting for. Troll would lose big time if he got involved with her.

Best outcome: husband goes NC, turns up 20 years later in Poland with a then-34-year-old wife and six kids who all look exactly like him. Doubt it will happen.

 

[goundra]

and what if someone, 6 months from now, meets you in the parking lot, with a ski mask on and a 4 ft length of steel pipe, eh? If i were you, I'd be ccwing a pistol for a long, long time, and I'd be GD fast and accurate with it, just in case.

 

[muscleman]

At this point, I would say ignore since you made the mistake of apologizing.

A guy calling you out for PMing his gf/wife is perfectly normal, that's standard mate guarding, but it's usually 'stop talking to my girl' or something similar. 'See you soon' is over the top. Since you already apologized there's no backtracking, just drop it and if this continues call the police,

BUT for next time, after you got the first message I would have called his bluff, something to the tune of:

'Oh look a documented threat. You'll be seeing the police soon too.' And leave it at that.

I have a little respect for a dude doing normal mate guarding (though if he was really all that to her he wouldn't have to in the first place), but if you take it that far you need to stick up for yourself - which you didn't. It's ok, maybe next time.